Matrix88
Silver
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2026
- Posts
- 640
- Reputation
- 412
I finished school 4 months ago, I'm alone now. I don't go out with friends, I don't have a gf, and I don't like my family.
I don't know what I'm going to do with my life, I hate the idea of studying a career I hate. I hate not being able to move to another country. I hate that I don't have the lives others do.
Days go by, the world moves, but I don't. I'm just waiting for something to happen, but it won't. I have to make the change in my life, but I'm not sure of what I want to do with my life specifically.
I don't want to be mean to people around me, I know they might appreciate me to a certain degree, but they don't mean that much to me.
When I'm alone with my thoughts, they are not there, its just me. They obviously didn't care enough, never asked me anything important about my life. I'm just another person to talk to in their lives, so why would I care about them.
My point is, I don't appreciate my life, so that includes all the people who "loves" me. If I were to be 100% sure my life won't change anywhere near the way I want it to, I WOULD kill myself
Being self aware might be a curse, I can't live knowing I'm a loser
I don't know what I'm going to do with my life, I hate the idea of studying a career I hate. I hate not being able to move to another country. I hate that I don't have the lives others do.
Days go by, the world moves, but I don't. I'm just waiting for something to happen, but it won't. I have to make the change in my life, but I'm not sure of what I want to do with my life specifically.
I don't want to be mean to people around me, I know they might appreciate me to a certain degree, but they don't mean that much to me.
When I'm alone with my thoughts, they are not there, its just me. They obviously didn't care enough, never asked me anything important about my life. I'm just another person to talk to in their lives, so why would I care about them.
My point is, I don't appreciate my life, so that includes all the people who "loves" me. If I were to be 100% sure my life won't change anywhere near the way I want it to, I WOULD kill myself
Being self aware might be a curse, I can't live knowing I'm a loser