I miss my teen years

[Loko88]

Legit. I'd pay to go back. I'm just 20 but it feels like it was the only time I was happy.
Here's my story, wanted to share because I'm feeling really down and needed to vent.

Freshman year of HS I was still a cel. As a kid I was GL, but then when puberty started I became kindof ugly (always had nice bones but had 0 harmony).
My face looked weird, and I had weird short haircuts because my hair started becoming trash and I didn't know how to manage it, so my father used to tell me to just have short haircuts. As a kid I had greek god tier soft hair with huge volume.
Through the year (and thanks to soft verbal bullying from a "cool" kid I always hang out with back then) I started taking care of my hair, and puberty has started to make me good looking. This is when I discovered looksmaxxing, starting, like a lot of you guys, with the red pill and then moving onto the black pill.

The next year puberty was almost finished and I became good looking.
I still remember my first love. Everything back then was so magical. I was 16. She had a boyfriend at the time.
We were flirting the entire year and without that experience I don't think I'd have the confidence I have now. It also taught me how to act around girls. I remember reading a huge thread on bodybuilding.com / the misc on how to behave with girls (it was a 10 page thread!!). I think that was the foundation of my current behavior.
Anyway, after a year of flirting and hinting, at the end of the year we basically confessed that we liked each other. Two days later you know what happened. It went on until the end of HS. I was finally happy. I had (and still have) solid friends, and I had someone special in my life. I didn't feel like the worthless cel that I was anymore.

I have a slay count of ~11 girls right now.
None of them have made me feel the way she did.
I'm not really happy anymore. I look great, I'm confident, have solid bros, but I still feel like something is missing.

 

[Vermilioncore]

Too bad bitch welcome to the future

 

[Deleted member 21146]

To long

 

[Deleted member 21628]

American psycho pfp = edgelorde cringe vomit

Die

 

[ascension!]

I'm just in your same place as you started, I'm 15 years old (and I suspect with late puberty, do you know how I can make sure of this? I guess because of my youngish looks at my age) and about 2-3 months ago I discovered the pills and the Looksmaxing, unfortunately I can say that although this change was not for the worse, but it was not for the better either, after being blackpilled I knew the "reality" of the world and that is, basically, if you are ugly you will not be happy and quite the opposite if you are GL, I am not ugly and some ppl tell me that I am GL, but my self-perception/knowledge changed for the worse, I lost all the confidence and security I had with myself (although every time I feel that I look better due to puberty), my biggest failo are my asymmetries and my hair doesn't compensate for it, I was already finding a haircut that compensated for this and it was a messy fringe, but I went to get it from a stylist and he screwed up my hair (literally he shorn everything, I'll never go back) and from that once everything fell down, because with my old haircut I was literally getting more appeal than what I get now fucked up. Although, I haven't even started Looksmaxing, I already have a plan, but I also lost my discipline and now I just procrastinate by playing video games every afternoon and eating SHIT, I need to fix this ASAP, I have one of the best potentials and I don't have such a bad base to start with (which means that most of my failures are fixable) and even so I'm already a bit GL for some friends, but I need to improve, I need to gain muscle mass/weight and not look so malnourished and "asshole". What do you recommend to change all this and start to really improve and make the most of my puberty? I have long wanted to find someone who has been through the same thing for me and has been successful and could help me.