D
Deleted member 22124
Prosocial, accountable, well-adjusted participant
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2022
- Posts
- 13,595
- Reputation
- 15,961
Feels like it's the only thing that helps right now. I don't drink a lot. I just need it sometimes or else life feels almost unbearable at times. I guess it shuts off the thinking part of the brain and lets me be a little bit in the moment.
Some days are really bad. I feel like a sponge for all the pain, loneliness, angst and despair. I try to squeeze it all out, but sooner rather than later I give out and it all just comes flooding back into me.
I cried the other day. It's not often that it happens, although it brings about a sense of healing and relief. It's a humbling experience, to know how fragile I still am deep down despite my ever so cavalier and nonchalant attitude.
I went out in the forest, because im embarrassed. Embarrassed because I'm embarrassed. Embarrassed because I'm not embarrassed. Embarrassed because I'm embarrassed that I'm embarrassed.
There's so many things that I would've different if I go a second go. I want to return to a place that never existed. For I have never known happiness. Never known what it means to be OK or felt a genuine sense of belonging.
I'm poisonous, tainted, toxic and malign. I need to go through a filtering process. Let the unpurities wash away and leave me as an untarnished, unscattered being.
It is not possible, I know it is not. When the storm came I took shelter in the most unexpected places. I stood and absorbed the radioactive energy right where lightning strook. I am now a superhero. Pay homage to my services, dear peasant folk. I will be your guardian angel and source of solace when showers scour.
Some days are really bad. I feel like a sponge for all the pain, loneliness, angst and despair. I try to squeeze it all out, but sooner rather than later I give out and it all just comes flooding back into me.
I cried the other day. It's not often that it happens, although it brings about a sense of healing and relief. It's a humbling experience, to know how fragile I still am deep down despite my ever so cavalier and nonchalant attitude.
I went out in the forest, because im embarrassed. Embarrassed because I'm embarrassed. Embarrassed because I'm not embarrassed. Embarrassed because I'm embarrassed that I'm embarrassed.
There's so many things that I would've different if I go a second go. I want to return to a place that never existed. For I have never known happiness. Never known what it means to be OK or felt a genuine sense of belonging.
I'm poisonous, tainted, toxic and malign. I need to go through a filtering process. Let the unpurities wash away and leave me as an untarnished, unscattered being.
It is not possible, I know it is not. When the storm came I took shelter in the most unexpected places. I stood and absorbed the radioactive energy right where lightning strook. I am now a superhero. Pay homage to my services, dear peasant folk. I will be your guardian angel and source of solace when showers scour.
