i people-please to avoid being questioned

D

Deleted member 86840

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i mask heavy because i grew up being conditioned, my authenticity was punished by my retarded parents. and when i just have my neutral face on and am minding my own business people ask if im okay which triggers me so bad, they obsessively ask if im upset and such, i feel like i cant ever be myself

i be masking heavy, raise my tone like a child, force expressions, making a fool of myself, like a jester, but it makes them not question me so i just keep doing it

im so fucking annoyed, i know its genuinely foolish. i hate people so bad why cant they just not question me and let me be
 
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i cant even get caught walking by myself when im not aware people are looking, because im not masking and they come up and ask why i look so pissed off, like fuck off nigger
 
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Yes, when I've wanted to mask hard, to hide an emotion or to avoid being seen as a weirdo during puberty, the most effective strategy was playing a caricature of a normie.
Over the top, interested in every little thing socially. "Oh that's a cool bag where did you get it from?" "Oh what music do you listen to" Who cares? But it really worked
 
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Yes, when I've wanted to mask hard, to hide an emotion or to avoid being seen as a weirdo during puberty, the most effective strategy was playing a caricature of a normie.
Over the top, interested in every little thing socially. "Oh that's a cool bag where did you get it from?" "Oh what music do you listen to" Who cares? But it really worked
i wanna un-normie myself and show people how i rly am
 
i wanna un-normie myself and show people how i rly am
Accept that the world wasn't made for aspies like us. At all
You are a 2 headed calf, a freak of nature
1772063089039

You will just have to focus on masking, but not to the point where you have a psychotic breakdown

For some people, that limit is a few days straight, some a few weeks, some it hits when they're 65 with grandkids, and for some it never does, in which case they're incredibly lucky

Places like this forum are a great place to not mask. Mask irl, act like a complete aspie here
 
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Reactions: moggerofhumanity
I relate a lot, especially with raising voice tone like a child. I was obsessed with reversing everything about masking myself latter half of last year. It's a very slow process but I've lowered my inhib significantly since then
1772063723087



I can share more pics like the one above if u wanna see them
 
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