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Attachment is the cause of suffering.
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2025
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I was circumcised at birth. And because of this: I want to kill myself. Let me explain.
I grew up in an evangelical Christian family - they mentioned that they didn't see an issue in the Bible due to Old Testament commandments, although they openly concede it isn't mandatory for individuals after Christ - in the United States; my parents circumcised me at birth.
Like many individuals when I hit adolescence: I started masturbating shortly afterwards. But I've always noticed that it's not very pleasurable at all. (Even with stuff... not like dry rubbing)
And the lubrication part? I didn't realize it was naturally destroyed until years later.
It gets even worse.
I can't even get into the ocean anymore. Recently, my exposed glans - from my lack of foreskin - become irritated, itchy, and sore in the salt water for days afterwards.
And here's the worst part.
I know that there's significant scientific debate on whether circumcision significantly affects sensitivity on parts of the penis that EXCLUDE the foreskin.
But that's not the point. I'll NEVER KNOW WHAT THOSE SPECIFIC NERVE ENDINGS FEEL LIKE. Does it not - even in the best case scenario - logically change the whole feeling of masturbation and sex in a much, much less pleasurable way?
So even if there isn't a significant change in pleasure for the REST of the penis: I'm missing a significant amount (majority?) of pleasurable sensations for the rest of my life.
I still have a sex drive: of course. But that makes it the worst part. There's not a lot of sensation at all. And I feel utterly humiliated because of this.
I've tried to cope with it. But I can't do it.
I've lost my faith in God. I resent my parents. And I just wish it could be undone.
I feel so emasculated.
And I just wish I could feel what sex/masturbation is actually supposed to feel like: just for ONE TIME in my life.
Is there any upcoming scientific research program that attempts to both RESTORE the foreskin and the NERVES lost as an infant?
I want to die right now. I'm filled with raw, horrific anger at what they did to me. I'll never have sex as it was supposed to be.
They mutilated me.
-I'll never have natural lubrication -I'll never have foreskin nerve endings -I'll never have an ability to reverse it
And if I tell anyone I know...
... they'll think I'm crazy.
Why is it so common in this country? How do religions defend the mutilation of children? How is this evil allowed?
Anyway I can cope with this? I do I handle being a man with this? I hate myself so much. What is wrong with this world?
I'm so, so desperate for an answer. I want my sexual relationships to be unaltered by this. But it seems like they'll always be tainted. I feel violated by my parents.
Is there anyone here circumcised as an adult that wants to help me cope? Because I don't know how to handle this.
I think of suicide everyday.
I grew up in an evangelical Christian family - they mentioned that they didn't see an issue in the Bible due to Old Testament commandments, although they openly concede it isn't mandatory for individuals after Christ - in the United States; my parents circumcised me at birth.
Like many individuals when I hit adolescence: I started masturbating shortly afterwards. But I've always noticed that it's not very pleasurable at all. (Even with stuff... not like dry rubbing)
And the lubrication part? I didn't realize it was naturally destroyed until years later.
It gets even worse.
I can't even get into the ocean anymore. Recently, my exposed glans - from my lack of foreskin - become irritated, itchy, and sore in the salt water for days afterwards.
And here's the worst part.
I know that there's significant scientific debate on whether circumcision significantly affects sensitivity on parts of the penis that EXCLUDE the foreskin.
But that's not the point. I'll NEVER KNOW WHAT THOSE SPECIFIC NERVE ENDINGS FEEL LIKE. Does it not - even in the best case scenario - logically change the whole feeling of masturbation and sex in a much, much less pleasurable way?
So even if there isn't a significant change in pleasure for the REST of the penis: I'm missing a significant amount (majority?) of pleasurable sensations for the rest of my life.
I still have a sex drive: of course. But that makes it the worst part. There's not a lot of sensation at all. And I feel utterly humiliated because of this.
I've tried to cope with it. But I can't do it.
I've lost my faith in God. I resent my parents. And I just wish it could be undone.
I feel so emasculated.
And I just wish I could feel what sex/masturbation is actually supposed to feel like: just for ONE TIME in my life.
Is there any upcoming scientific research program that attempts to both RESTORE the foreskin and the NERVES lost as an infant?
I want to die right now. I'm filled with raw, horrific anger at what they did to me. I'll never have sex as it was supposed to be.
They mutilated me.
-I'll never have natural lubrication -I'll never have foreskin nerve endings -I'll never have an ability to reverse it
And if I tell anyone I know...
... they'll think I'm crazy.
Why is it so common in this country? How do religions defend the mutilation of children? How is this evil allowed?
Anyway I can cope with this? I do I handle being a man with this? I hate myself so much. What is wrong with this world?
I'm so, so desperate for an answer. I want my sexual relationships to be unaltered by this. But it seems like they'll always be tainted. I feel violated by my parents.
Is there anyone here circumcised as an adult that wants to help me cope? Because I don't know how to handle this.
I think of suicide everyday.