iamgoingtoascend
Silver
- Joined
- Jul 17, 2025
- Posts
- 581
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one year later looking back at this thread, i spent it all depressed and rotting. Didnt make any progress.
I dropped out of high school in august 2025 around the time i joined the site. I had 1 year left. Now im 19, soon to be 20 in january. I spent all 12 months wasted. I didnt get a job, i didnt save up for surgery, i knew what to do, i knew what i needed to do and i did nothing. I just rotted in my room all day LDARING. Wasted an entire year of my life doing this.
Prior to summer 2025 i had no clue about the fact i needed to hardmaxx, i was bluepilled and naive. So that time period i cant blame myself for. But these last 12 months were literally just all my fault. Fucking brutal. And now i am so astronomically behind everybody else.
I have completely fucked up everything by doing this. Now i am even more behind and if i do end up ascending it will be at a later stage. I dont know whats wrong with me. I dont know why i cant bring myself to take action. I KNEW i needed surgery. I KNEW i needed a job to wageslave. I didnt even apply. I didnt even write a CV. Why? What is wrong with me. Why cant i do anything? What is the solution? Is there a solution? Is it over? Should i commit? Rope?
Fuck. I wish i could go back. just go back to last summer and actually do something. Have done something for this year.
And i already see the replies, "oh well take action now" and yes i know. I dont know if i can though. As mentioned, i cant bring myself to do anything. I just LDAR all day and do nothing. I have no habits, no routines, and i dont know how to cut off the LDARING. I dont know how to take action. Like seriously i dont know how to bring myself to do shit i need to do. This is my biggest failo of all.
My username is truly hypocrisy
