I will never be able to upload a candid picture of myself smiling to the internet

[6ft4]

I have fear if I posted a picture like this of myself I would cause feelings of disgust in others so I cope by thinking anyone who is willing to post a pic like this must be narcy and low sentience when in reality they just don't believe that a picture of themselves smiling would cause others to feel disgusted

Can anyone relate to this

 

[6ft4]

When I see someone who looks happy and carefree and is willing to share it with the world by posting it online, I insult them in my mind because I tell myself they don't deserve happiness while I am stuck dwelling in misery
I assume other people think this way and would hate seeing me smiling because I simply don't deserve to

 

[sorrowfulsad]

can relate

 

[Entschuldigung]