If I was born good looking

[Deleted member 15674]

I was sitting in my room earlier contemplating things and meditating, the impact inceldom has had on my life is unspeakable. The blackpill and this entire fringe ideology will always be with me, and even if I were to break free and become someone wanted, my problems would remain the same. I was affected by this shit at a young age, a formative age. My entire life I was treated badly, at no point in my life had I ever deluded myself I was someone wanted by women or even remotely attractive. From the start I was blackpilled, my mother commenting on my appearance, telling me I was ugly and asking me why I was so dark. Even to this day, the idea that a woman would find me remotely attractive still feels foreign to me - despite women telling me before I was attractive.

From the ages of 4 to 11, I was beaten up at school because of my small frame and introverted nature. My earliest childhood memory is me being beaten, and then hiding behind the teacher. Even in my school reports there are comments on my introverted behaviour, my refusal to work with others and my unwillingness to speak to big groups of people.

My life had started to improve past 11, and I was functional and very normal at that age. I still knew I was ugly, but at least I was funny. By 16 I wanted to find out why I was not getting girls and how can I remedy this situation. I stumbled upon r/theredpill. And from there, life began to descend so fast. I quickly found myself on r/incels and finding the meme relatable, the part where they were talking about 5'4 Indians was brutal too. I am the archtypical incel, the genetic trash, I had accepted it was over.

Even now with my life improving, I still feel the same. Even when women are starting to give me attention, I just think of my previous life experiences, nothing will ever change for me.

If I was born good looking maybe I'd never have found this place, I'd never have found out about redpill, never read about philosophy, never have gotten bullied and picked up fighting sports. I might have been normal and gone drinking every weekend with my girlfriend like how normies would.

 

[Deleted member 23558]

You are not that bad looking tbh w proper fashion and lifts i can see you slaying semi regularly

//RabidRosaries

 

[emoterrorist]

 

[Deleted member 23558]

View attachment 1937126

niga are u jacking off

 

[Deleted member 15674]

You are not that bad looking tbh w proper fashion and lifts i can see you slaying semi regularly

//RabidRosaries

It would change nothing man. Imagine being a fucking 10 year old kid, your mother calling you a nigger because you are dark skinned and being yelled at for being short. I had no control over these features yet my mother hated me for it. I even tried coping with religion, thinking maybe I am not ugly because God made me in his vision. But then religion can only shield you so much

 

[Deleted member 23558]

It would change nothing man. Imagine being a fucking 10 year old kid, your mother calling you a nigger because you are dark skinned and being yelled at for being short. I had no control over these features yet my mother hated me for it. I even tried coping with religion, thinking maybe I am not ugly because God made me in his vision. But then religion can only shield you so much

indeed life is gay and cringe sometimes but arent you ntmaxed and hobby maxed niga? U also on the chubby side last time I saw you. Leanmax and prettyboy max I srsly see you slaying hard you have an extremely NT palate and smile- ur best feature imo (and my worst)

//RabidRosaries

 

[Deleted member 15674]

indeed life is gay and cringe sometimes but arent you ntmaxed and hobby maxed niga? U also on the chubby side last time I saw you. Leanmax and prettyboy max I srsly see you slaying hard you have an extremely NT palate and smile- ur best feature imo (and my worst)

//RabidRosaries

Oh I am a bit leaner now, I can send you what I look like now bro. And yeah I appear very normal on the outside

 

[Deleted member 23558]

Oh I am a bit leaner now, I can send you what I look like now bro. And yeah I appear very normal on the outside

get to 10 percent

 

[Deleted member 15674]

get to 10 percent

I am bulking to build some muscle atm, I wanna be gymcelled first. I have accepted it's over for me for the time being.

 

[Danish_Retard]

What are your thoughts/copes on the unfairness of life?

Do you find meaning in the nihilism of it?

 

[ChadpreetMaxxer]

obviously your problem is height and race. not face

 

[Deleted member 17920]

life is so fucking unfair i wanna kms everytime i think about it

 

[BugeyeBigNoseCurry]

You look better than me facially

 

[Nihlismmaxxer]

I was sitting in my room earlier contemplating things and meditating, the impact inceldom has had on my life is unspeakable. The blackpill and this entire fringe ideology will always be with me, and even if I were to break free and become someone wanted, my problems would remain the same. I was affected by this shit at a young age, a formative age. My entire life I was treated badly, at no point in my life had I ever deluded myself I was someone wanted by women or even remotely attractive. From the start I was blackpilled, my mother commenting on my appearance, telling me I was ugly and asking me why I was so dark. Even to this day, the idea that a woman would find me remotely attractive still feels foreign to me - despite women telling me before I was attractive.

From the ages of 4 to 11, I was beaten up at school because of my small frame and introverted nature. My earliest childhood memory is me being beaten, and then hiding behind the teacher. Even in my school reports there are comments on my introverted behaviour, my refusal to work with others and my unwillingness to speak to big groups of people.

My life had started to improve past 11, and I was functional and very normal at that age. I still knew I was ugly, but at least I was funny. By 16 I wanted to find out why I was not getting girls and how can I remedy this situation. I stumbled upon r/theredpill. And from there, life began to descend so fast. I quickly found myself on r/incels and finding the meme relatable, the part where they were talking about 5'4 Indians was brutal too. I am the archtypical incel, the genetic trash, I had accepted it was over.

Even now with my life improving, I still feel the same. Even when women are starting to give me attention, I just think of my previous life experiences, nothing will ever change for me.

If I was born good looking maybe I'd never have found this place, I'd never have found out about redpill, never read about philosophy, never have gotten bullied and picked up fighting sports. I might have been normal and gone drinking every weekend with my girlfriend like how normies would.

I get caught on the what ifs too man. But from your pain you have the gift of self growth and introspection that a normie does not have. It could be a cope but that’s a valuable skill and can make even being by yourself and thinking somewhat interesting if nothing more. It’s why philosophy is interesting to me, even if it doesn’t necessarily lead anywhere

 

[Deleted member 15674]

What are your thoughts/copes on the unfairness of life?

Do you find meaning in the nihilism of it?

I blame the education system/school for your first question. Our view of "fair" is a false skewed view which was fed to us as kids. As kids the idea that someone who works hard will be rewarded and that looks doesn't matter, is a view which would make someone obedient. If we were told the truth from a young age, we'd not view this as unfairness, but simply view it as it is.

There is very little meaning in anything really. I've created some arbitary goals, and have a rough plan of where I want to be in life. I know they won't really solve my problems, but they keep me going. If I cannot achieve my dreams, I don't see much point in living tbh.

obviously your problem is height and race. not face

everythign is my problem

You look better than me facially

cope

I get caught on the what ifs too man. But from your pain you have the gift of self growth and introspection that a normie does not have. It could be a cope but that’s a valuable skill and can make even being by yourself and thinking somewhat interesting if nothing more. It’s why philosophy is interesting to me, even if it doesn’t necessarily lead anywhere

That's true man, a lot of my normie friends think I am wise or some shit because of the introspective aspect of me. But the self growth stuff is really what keeps me alive. I believe in myself and think I can turn things around. But I know my emotions won't change.

 

[rand anon]

Oh I am a bit leaner now, I can send you what I look like now bro. And yeah I appear very normal on the outside

Pm

 

[AscensionMan98]

It would change nothing man. Imagine being a fucking 10 year old kid, your mother calling you a nigger because you are dark skinned and being yelled at for being short. I had no control over these features yet my mother hated me for it. I even tried coping with religion, thinking maybe I am not ugly because God made me in his vision. But then religion can only shield you so much

Should have snapped back at her saying why did she mate in the first place to make you. Stupid self hating bitch. And height comes from the mom also.

I wonder how bad the self hate is with hapa families. The moms married a white dude out of self hate, and then the kid still has asian eyes. Its not really a problem or the foids , but the men

 

[ascension]

Good thread man. I can relate to the part where your brain refuses to believe a woman finds you attractive even though girls in the past have said that you are. I've been called ugly since I was 11 years old. These things stay with you for life, even if the odd girl here or there calls you attractive. A drop of red dye into the ocean won't turn the whole thing red. A few compliments won't make any difference in an ocean of insults and bad experiences. I've been permanently damaged by all the hate but the lack of support too. No one has ever asked me if I'm feeling ok, or how I'm doing, or attempted to get to know me on a deeper level. In their eyes I'm not human, you see. I'm just another ugly brown guy, a drop in a vast sea of a billion ugly guys that inhabit the Earth. It's not like I'm special or have any value to society.

 

[Deleted member 15674]

Good thread man. I can relate to the part where your brain refuses to believe a woman finds you attractive even though girls in the past have said that you are. I've been called ugly since I was 11 years old. These things stay with you for life, even if the odd girl here or there calls you attractive. A drop of red dye into the ocean won't turn the whole thing red. A few compliments won't make any difference in an ocean of insults and bad experiences. I've been permanently damaged by all the hate but the lack of support too. No one has ever asked me if I'm feeling ok, or how I'm doing, or attempted to get to know me on a deeper level. In their eyes I'm not human, you see. I'm just another ugly brown guy, a drop in a vast sea of a billion ugly guys that inhabit the Earth. It's not like I'm special or have any value to society.

It’s weird I sometimes feel like things like having a gf isn’t for me. Like people like me aren’t supposed to have one, and that normal people are meant to. It’s so weird, it’s like I’m detached from the idea of intimacy with a woman

 

[vaninskybird]

some of us are cursed and the worst part is that we're not even special in out misery and misfortune