i'm a piece of shit retard

[hax]

you guys cannot come remotely close to being as neurodivergent as me. i put that on everything i love.

i just ranted about my life for the past 3 hours, and it made me discover so much i didn’t know about myself.

i reflected on the future, the present, the past... i’m just a horrible person with hyper-obsessions.

jfl at you normies: “muh sex, muh social skills, 6'0 bro, 6'0 btw.” dating isn’t even a fraction of my suffering.

you all will never understand the pain of being in a body that not only doesn’t belong to you, but that you also cannot control.

 

[HundredManSlayer]

talking to myself in solitude always fixes my life ngl, always calms me down too

 

[Wuzzdio]

You smoked @ihateevb in a thread though

 

[hax]

talking to myself in solitude always fixes my life ngl, always calms me down too

didn't do shit for me, the more i think, the sadder i get.

it's so putrid having to wake up knowing my body is not mine, knowing i will tweak out against my own will, knowing i'm fighting myself.

i can't control myself, my emotions remain blank, my tics ruins my living and everyone irl cannot stop laughing about them.

 

[donpuro]

I’d rather have whatever autism that is than that be short jfl

 

[HundredManSlayer]

didn't do shit for me, the more i think, the sadder i get.

it's so putrid having to wake up knowing my body is not mine, knowing i will tweak out against my own will, knowing i'm fighting myself.

i can't control myself, my emotions remain blank, my tics ruins my living and everyone irl cannot stop laughing about them.

what do you mean “body is not mine”?

i also have tics, i developed them through stress and trauma in high school, never got rid of them since then

 

[hax]

I’d rather have whatever autism that is than that be short jfl

no you fucking wouldn't, there are no amount of threads i can make to truly express the lack of control i have over my own body.

 

[hax]

what do you mean “body is not mine”?

i also have tics, i developed them through stress and trauma in high school, never got rid of them since then

that would have to be a whole seperate thread, i'll make sure to tag you after i get good sleep later today, i cannot formulate a thought right now.

 

[donpuro]

no you fucking wouldn't, there are no amount of threads i can make to truly express the lack of control i have over my own body.

Have you considered seeing professional mental help or like just trying with parents or dig yourself out of this whole

Like so you are going ldar forever?? Why not rope at that point

 

[hax]

Have you considered seeing professional mental help or like just trying with parents or dig yourself out of this whole

sent to the ward once, past 6 years in therapy, have seen multiple people that were supposed to help me, nothing.

all my problems aren't fixable though words but physical change and touch, nothing will ever satisfy my needs.

Like so you are going ldar forever?? Why not rope at that point

i dream every morning about not moving, acting completely disabled until the day i die, pass on the news as "the kid who couldn't move due to his retardation", like a rock, a glued object, waiting for things to get better.

not a day in my life will i consider roping without the affection of another human being. being unable to love other humans i a putrid, putrid feeling. it will haunt me to the grave.

 

[ihateevb]

You smoked @ihateevb in a thread though

How

 

[Wuzzdio]

How

I tagged you in another thread

 

[dawooddX]

you guys cannot come remotely close to being as neurodivergent as me. i put that on everything i love.

i just ranted about my life for the past 3 hours, and it made me discover so much i didn’t know about myself.

i reflected on the future, the present, the past... i’m just a horrible person with hyper-obsessions.

jfl at you normies: “muh sex, muh social skills, 6'0 bro, 6'0 btw.” dating isn’t even a fraction of my suffering.

you all will never understand the pain of being in a body that not only doesn’t belong to you, but that you also cannot control.

listen pal im gonna say this, it may not be the best but its true

it does not matter, genuienly

your a male in modern society. ur bound to suffer one way or another as society gets more fucked.

ur victim complex will be the death of u. i wanna complain abt sm other shit as well genuienly. but ik it doesnt matter because nobody will care NOR do anything about it. past or future, u only do what u can during the present to change that

learn to embrace it and accept it. theres no value in suffering its the way in life. learn to suffer in silence and stop feeling pity for urself

or else the only ne responsible for what happens is YOU

 

[MANLETprettyBOY]

Cute

 

[ihateevb]

you guys cannot come remotely close to being as neurodivergent as me. i put that on everything i love.

i just ranted about my life for the past 3 hours, and it made me discover so much i didn’t know about myself.

i reflected on the future, the present, the past... i’m just a horrible person with hyper-obsessions.

jfl at you normies: “muh sex, muh social skills, 6'0 bro, 6'0 btw.” dating isn’t even a fraction of my suffering.

you all will never understand the pain of being in a body that not only doesn’t belong to you, but that you also cannot control.

Being nd and a mentalcel is different, having sadistic traits and being scizo, and autism is different. Why do you think your nd maybe i can help

 

[hax]

listen pal im gonna say this, it may not be the best but its true

it does not matter, genuienly

your a male in modern society. ur bound to suffer one way or another as society gets more fucked.

ur victim complex will be the death of u. i wanna complain abt sm other shit as well genuienly. but ik it doesnt matter because nobody will care NOR do anything about it. past or future, u only do what u can during the present to change that

learn to embrace it and accept it. theres no value in suffering its the way in life. learn to suffer in silence and stop feeling pity for urself

or else the only ne responsible for what happens is YOU

my problem does not come from society, i am actually well isolated from it.

it comes from internal pain and control, something subconscious i cannot control.

 

[hax]

Being nd and a mentalcel is different, having sadistic traits and being scizo, and autism is different. Why do you think your nd maybe i can help

i'll make a thread tagging you and hundredmanslayer where i'll explain everything in full detail.

 

[ihateevb]

i'll make a thread tagging you and hundredmanslayer where i'll explain everything in full detail.

Yes good bhai

 

[IAMNOTANINCEL]

that would have to be a whole seperate thread, i'll make sure to tag you after i get good sleep later today, i cannot formulate a thought right now.

u wanna troon out or what

 

[hax]

u wanna troon out or what

do you want me to tag you in a wall of text thread?

 

[IAMNOTANINCEL]

do you want me to tag you in a wall of text thread?

ok

 

[whateverittakes245]

terabump, fuck this evil world. you might have it worse than me, or not, I don't know, but just remember never to apologize to anyone for how you are man

 

[kenibba]

i'll make a thread tagging you and hundredmanslayer where i'll explain everything in full detail.

tag me as well

 

[hax]

tag me as well

well it was mostly this thread:

https://looksmax.org/threads/looksmaxxing-and-its-influence-on-my-retardation-tldr-included.1891672/

i wanted to make an actual FULL thread of all the complications i'm facing but it was gonna be too long for the quality of text i provide.
i just don't feel like thinking about what i'm going up against; it makes me more aware of the bad that's happening around me.