Nazi Germany
Zubeer Adolf Hipster(One testicle with Micropenis)
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2024
- Posts
- 1,791
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I'm done and that's really all there is to it because when you spend enough time in a place you start to notice the walls closing in and the air getting thinner and at some point you realize you're not breathing anymore you're just cycling the same stale oxygen through your lungs over and over until it stops meaning anything and that's where I am now.This whole thing has become a kind of slow-motion collapse where everybody's talking but nobody's actually saying anything real anymore and I don't mean that in some pretentious way I mean it in the way that when you look at a word too long it stops being a word and starts being just shapes and sounds that your brain forgot how to process and that's what happened here except with entire conversations entire communities entire ways of being. The thing nobody wants to admit is that we've all been rewiring ourselves and not in a good way not in a growth way but in a survival way like when an organism adapts to a toxic environment by becoming toxic itself and you can feel it happening in real time when you're here you can feel your thoughts getting shorter your attention getting more fractured your ability to sit with discomfort or complexity or anything that doesn't immediately reward you just withering away like unused muscle tissue and everybody pretends this is fine this is normal this is just how things are now.But it's not fine because we're turning into something else and I don't think we're even noticing it happening we're becoming these weird half-present entities that exist in multiple places at once but aren't fully anywhere and our relationships aren't relationships anymore they're these strange performance pieces where we're constantly calibrating and adjusting and presenting and none of it feels like actual human connection it feels like some bizarre simulation of human connection that we've all agreed to pretend is the real thing. And the worst part is how it gets into your head how it changes the way you think even when you're not here you start thinking in these short reactive bursts you start performing for an invisible audience you start measuring everything by how it might be received rather than whether it's true or meaningful and that's a kind of violence actually that's a kind of slow erasure of whatever makes you you and replacing it with this crowd-sourced version of a person.I watch people here and they're not even people anymore they're like collections of reactions and opinions and takes that they've assembled from other people's reactions and opinions and takes and there's no center anymore no actual self just this hollow space where a person used to be and they're filling it with noise with content with engagement with anything that makes them feel like they still exist and maybe they do maybe I'm wrong but I don't think so. The whole architecture of this place is designed to make you crazy and I mean that literally not hyperbolically it's designed to keep you in a state of low-level anxiety and arousal at all times because that's what keeps you coming back and we all know this we all understand this on some level but we keep doing it anyway because the alternative is being alone with ourselves and most of us can't handle that anymore we've lost the ability to just sit in our own heads without needing external stimulation every five seconds.And everybody's so angry all the time about everything and the anger doesn't even mean anything anymore it's just become this default setting this baseline state of being and people are addicted to it they're addicted to the feeling of righteous fury even when there's nothing righteous about it even when it's just free-floating rage looking for a target any target and finding one and then moving on to the next one and the next one in an endless cycle that goes nowhere and accomplishes nothing.We're all performing authenticity which is the most inauthentic thing you can possibly do we're all trying so hard to seem real and genuine and vulnerable but it's all calculated it's all strategic it's all designed to generate a specific response and somewhere along the way we forgot how to actually be those things we forgot how to be real when nobody's watching when there's no likes or comments or validation coming back at us.
The speed of everything is destroying our ability to think clearly about anything because you can't think clearly when you're constantly being interrupted constantly being pulled in seventeen different directions constantly being asked to have an opinion on something you just learned about five seconds ago and the idea that you might need time to process information or sit with uncertainty or just not know something has become completely foreign we all have to have takes on everything immediately and those takes have to be strong and confident even when we have no idea what we're talking about.
And I'm tired of watching people mistake information for knowledge and knowledge for wisdom and wisdom for whatever the hell we're calling this thing now where everyone's an expert on everything because they read a thread or watched a video or saw a chart and now they're absolutely certain about complex topics that actual specialists spend their entire lives trying to understand and still come away with more questions than answers.
The feedback loops are getting tighter and tighter and more and more vicious and we're all trapped in them and they're making us worse they're making us stupider and meaner and more tribal and less able to see other people as actual people rather than as representatives of whatever group or ideology we've decided they belong to and this isn't sustainable this can't continue this is breaking something fundamental in how humans are supposed to relate to each other.
Nobody reads anymore I mean really reads not skimming not scrolling not looking for the gotcha or the sick burn but actually taking in information and thinking about it and letting it change their mind if it should and that loss is catastrophic that loss is maybe the thing that signals we're too far gone because without that ability without that patience we're just mobs we're just crowds we're just noise.
The algorithms have trained us so well and we don't even see it anymore we think we're making choices but we're really just following patterns that were designed by people who understand how to manipulate human psychology better than we understand ourselves and every day we give them more data more information more access to our minds and they use it to make us more predictable more controllable more profitable. Everything here is designed to make you feel like you're missing something like there's always more you need to see more you need to know more you need to respond to and that artificial scarcity of attention that manufactured urgency it's killing us it's literally changing our brain chemistry and not in some abstract way but in a measurable physical way that we're only beginning to understand the consequences of.We've built these systems that externalize our memories our thoughts our relationships our entire inner lives and now we can't function without them we've made ourselves dependent on them and that dependency is only growing stronger and at some point you have to ask what happens to a human being when all the things that used to happen inside their own mind start happening outside of it in servers and clouds and networks that they don't control and can't access if the power goes out.
And the loneliness is everywhere you can feel it radiating off everyone here despite being constantly connected or maybe because of being constantly connected we're all more isolated than ever we're all more desperate for real contact for actual understanding for someone to see us as we actually are rather than as our profiles or our posts or our performance of ourselves and that desperation makes us do increasingly strange things to get attention to feel seen to feel like we matter.
The truth is I don't know who I am anymore when I'm here because I've spent so long shaping myself to fit into this space optimizing myself for this environment that I've lost touch with whatever I was before and maybe that person wasn't great maybe that person needed to change but not like this not into this weird reactive defensive fragmented thing that I've becomefor secret agendas for signs of betrayal or disloyalty to whatever tribe you're supposed to belong to and the exhaustion of that the constant vigilance the constant self-monitoring it's unsustainable it's making us paranoid it's making us unable to trust anyone including ourselves.We're drowning in information but starving for meaning we have access to more knowledge than any humans in history but we're not getting wiser we're not getting better we're just getting louder and more certain and more convinced that our tiny slice of perspective is the whole truth and anyone who disagrees is either stupid or evil.
The present moment has ceased to exist we're always somewhere else always thinking about what we're going to post about what just happened or what someone else posted or what might happen next and we're never just here just now just experiencing life directly without the mediation of screens and feeds and notifications. And I know I sound like every other person who's ever said they're leaving I know this is its own kind of performance its own kind of announcement seeking its own kind of validation but I also know that if I don't get out now if I don't physically remove myself from this environment I'm going to lose something I can't get back and I can feel it slipping away already I can feel myself becoming less than I was. The saddest part is how normal this all seems how we've collectively agreed that this is just how life is now and anyone who questions it is a luddite or a romantic or someone who just doesn't get it but maybe the people who don't get it are the ones who can't see how profoundly weird and unhealthy this whole arrangement is how much we've sacrificed for the sake of connection that isn't really connection at all.I'm leaving because I have to because staying means continuing to participate in something that I've come to believe is fundamentally damaging to whatever it means to be human and I don't have a better answer I don't have a solution I just know that I can't do this anymore I can't keep feeding this thing that's feeding on all of us.So that's it I'm out I'm done and I don't expect anyone to care or understand or even read this whole thing but I needed to say it needed to articulate it even just for myself so I can remember why I left when the pull to come back gets strong and it will get strong because this place is designed to be addictive designed to make you feel like you need it like you can't survive without it but I'm going to try anyway.
The speed of everything is destroying our ability to think clearly about anything because you can't think clearly when you're constantly being interrupted constantly being pulled in seventeen different directions constantly being asked to have an opinion on something you just learned about five seconds ago and the idea that you might need time to process information or sit with uncertainty or just not know something has become completely foreign we all have to have takes on everything immediately and those takes have to be strong and confident even when we have no idea what we're talking about.
And I'm tired of watching people mistake information for knowledge and knowledge for wisdom and wisdom for whatever the hell we're calling this thing now where everyone's an expert on everything because they read a thread or watched a video or saw a chart and now they're absolutely certain about complex topics that actual specialists spend their entire lives trying to understand and still come away with more questions than answers.
The feedback loops are getting tighter and tighter and more and more vicious and we're all trapped in them and they're making us worse they're making us stupider and meaner and more tribal and less able to see other people as actual people rather than as representatives of whatever group or ideology we've decided they belong to and this isn't sustainable this can't continue this is breaking something fundamental in how humans are supposed to relate to each other.
Nobody reads anymore I mean really reads not skimming not scrolling not looking for the gotcha or the sick burn but actually taking in information and thinking about it and letting it change their mind if it should and that loss is catastrophic that loss is maybe the thing that signals we're too far gone because without that ability without that patience we're just mobs we're just crowds we're just noise.
The algorithms have trained us so well and we don't even see it anymore we think we're making choices but we're really just following patterns that were designed by people who understand how to manipulate human psychology better than we understand ourselves and every day we give them more data more information more access to our minds and they use it to make us more predictable more controllable more profitable. Everything here is designed to make you feel like you're missing something like there's always more you need to see more you need to know more you need to respond to and that artificial scarcity of attention that manufactured urgency it's killing us it's literally changing our brain chemistry and not in some abstract way but in a measurable physical way that we're only beginning to understand the consequences of.We've built these systems that externalize our memories our thoughts our relationships our entire inner lives and now we can't function without them we've made ourselves dependent on them and that dependency is only growing stronger and at some point you have to ask what happens to a human being when all the things that used to happen inside their own mind start happening outside of it in servers and clouds and networks that they don't control and can't access if the power goes out.
And the loneliness is everywhere you can feel it radiating off everyone here despite being constantly connected or maybe because of being constantly connected we're all more isolated than ever we're all more desperate for real contact for actual understanding for someone to see us as we actually are rather than as our profiles or our posts or our performance of ourselves and that desperation makes us do increasingly strange things to get attention to feel seen to feel like we matter.
The truth is I don't know who I am anymore when I'm here because I've spent so long shaping myself to fit into this space optimizing myself for this environment that I've lost touch with whatever I was before and maybe that person wasn't great maybe that person needed to change but not like this not into this weird reactive defensive fragmented thing that I've becomefor secret agendas for signs of betrayal or disloyalty to whatever tribe you're supposed to belong to and the exhaustion of that the constant vigilance the constant self-monitoring it's unsustainable it's making us paranoid it's making us unable to trust anyone including ourselves.We're drowning in information but starving for meaning we have access to more knowledge than any humans in history but we're not getting wiser we're not getting better we're just getting louder and more certain and more convinced that our tiny slice of perspective is the whole truth and anyone who disagrees is either stupid or evil.
The present moment has ceased to exist we're always somewhere else always thinking about what we're going to post about what just happened or what someone else posted or what might happen next and we're never just here just now just experiencing life directly without the mediation of screens and feeds and notifications. And I know I sound like every other person who's ever said they're leaving I know this is its own kind of performance its own kind of announcement seeking its own kind of validation but I also know that if I don't get out now if I don't physically remove myself from this environment I'm going to lose something I can't get back and I can feel it slipping away already I can feel myself becoming less than I was. The saddest part is how normal this all seems how we've collectively agreed that this is just how life is now and anyone who questions it is a luddite or a romantic or someone who just doesn't get it but maybe the people who don't get it are the ones who can't see how profoundly weird and unhealthy this whole arrangement is how much we've sacrificed for the sake of connection that isn't really connection at all.I'm leaving because I have to because staying means continuing to participate in something that I've come to believe is fundamentally damaging to whatever it means to be human and I don't have a better answer I don't have a solution I just know that I can't do this anymore I can't keep feeding this thing that's feeding on all of us.So that's it I'm out I'm done and I don't expect anyone to care or understand or even read this whole thing but I needed to say it needed to articulate it even just for myself so I can remember why I left when the pull to come back gets strong and it will get strong because this place is designed to be addictive designed to make you feel like you need it like you can't survive without it but I'm going to try anyway.
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