Im scared my parents will find out

[Deleted member 318951]

Im scared they will find out i steal lie and more and im always cared and in alert mode cause of this what can i do(im 13 btw)

 

[Deleted member 104510]

I’m really glad you said something. What you’re describing sounds really stressful, especially at 13. Being in “alert mode” all the time is exhausting, and it makes sense you’re scared.





A few important things first:

• You’re not a bad person. Stealing or lying doesn’t define who you are—it usually means something else is going on (fear, pressure, wanting approval, avoiding trouble, impulse).
• Constant fear + always being on guard = anxiety. That doesn’t mean anything is “wrong” with you, but it does mean you need support.

What you can do


right now








1. Stop digging the hole deeper


The biggest relief comes from stopping the behaviors that keep the fear alive.

• Decide: “I’m done stealing. I’m done lying.”
• Even if it feels hard, this alone lowers anxiety over time because there’s less to be caught for.

2. You don’t have to confess everything at once


People often think it’s “confess or explode.” That’s not true.

• You can start by being honest from now on
• If something small comes up, tell the truth even if it’s uncomfortable. That builds confidence fast.

3. Tell ONE safe adult


This is really important.

• A parent, older sibling, school counselor, teacher, or another adult you trust
• You don’t need to give every detail. You can say:
  “I’ve been lying and stealing sometimes and it’s making me anxious all the time. I don’t know how to stop and I need help.”

Adults can help protect you and help you fix things. Keeping it secret keeps the fear alive.





4. Learn how to calm your body


When you’re always scared, your nervous system is stuck in danger mode.


Try this when you feel panicky:

• Slow inhale through nose (4 seconds)
• Hold (2 seconds)
• Slow exhale through mouth (6 seconds)
  Do it 5–6 times. It actually tells your brain you’re safe.

5. Understand this truth


Most people who “get found out” don’t get ruined.


They:

• get consequences
• feel embarrassed
• but then… the fear is gone

Living scared every day is often worse than facing a problem once.

 

[McSkziofren]

Whoever lies, steals as well.

But its not neccesarily correct the other way around.

 

[Deleted member 318951]

I’m really glad you said something. What you’re describing sounds really stressful, especially at 13. Being in “alert mode” all the time is exhausting, and it makes sense you’re scared.





A few important things first:

• You’re not a bad person. Stealing or lying doesn’t define who you are—it usually means something else is going on (fear, pressure, wanting approval, avoiding trouble, impulse).
• Constant fear + always being on guard = anxiety. That doesn’t mean anything is “wrong” with you, but it does mean you need support.

What you can do


right now








1. Stop digging the hole deeper


The biggest relief comes from stopping the behaviors that keep the fear alive.

• Decide: “I’m done stealing. I’m done lying.”
• Even if it feels hard, this alone lowers anxiety over time because there’s less to be caught for.

2. You don’t have to confess everything at once


People often think it’s “confess or explode.” That’s not true.

• You can start by being honest from now on
• If something small comes up, tell the truth even if it’s uncomfortable. That builds confidence fast.

3. Tell ONE safe adult


This is really important.

• A parent, older sibling, school counselor, teacher, or another adult you trust
• You don’t need to give every detail. You can say:
  “I’ve been lying and stealing sometimes and it’s making me anxious all the time. I don’t know how to stop and I need help.”

Adults can help protect you and help you fix things. Keeping it secret keeps the fear alive.





4. Learn how to calm your body


When you’re always scared, your nervous system is stuck in danger mode.


Try this when you feel panicky:

• Slow inhale through nose (4 seconds)
• Hold (2 seconds)
• Slow exhale through mouth (6 seconds)
  Do it 5–6 times. It actually tells your brain you’re safe.

5. Understand this truth


Most people who “get found out” don’t get ruined.


They:

• get consequences
• feel embarrassed
• but then… the fear is gone

Living scared every day is often worse than facing a problem once.

Omg this is the best advice i ever got tysm

 

[Deleted member 104510]

Omg this is the best advice i ever got tysm

Yeah you’re welcome

 

[Deleted member 259104]

I’m really glad you said something. What you’re describing sounds really stressful, especially at 13. Being in “alert mode” all the time is exhausting, and it makes sense you’re scared.





A few important things first:

• You’re not a bad person. Stealing or lying doesn’t define who you are—it usually means something else is going on (fear, pressure, wanting approval, avoiding trouble, impulse).
• Constant fear + always being on guard = anxiety. That doesn’t mean anything is “wrong” with you, but it does mean you need support.

What you can do


right now








1. Stop digging the hole deeper


The biggest relief comes from stopping the behaviors that keep the fear alive.

• Decide: “I’m done stealing. I’m done lying.”
• Even if it feels hard, this alone lowers anxiety over time because there’s less to be caught for.

2. You don’t have to confess everything at once


People often think it’s “confess or explode.” That’s not true.

• You can start by being honest from now on
• If something small comes up, tell the truth even if it’s uncomfortable. That builds confidence fast.

3. Tell ONE safe adult


This is really important.

• A parent, older sibling, school counselor, teacher, or another adult you trust
• You don’t need to give every detail. You can say:
  “I’ve been lying and stealing sometimes and it’s making me anxious all the time. I don’t know how to stop and I need help.”

Adults can help protect you and help you fix things. Keeping it secret keeps the fear alive.





4. Learn how to calm your body


When you’re always scared, your nervous system is stuck in danger mode.


Try this when you feel panicky:

• Slow inhale through nose (4 seconds)
• Hold (2 seconds)
• Slow exhale through mouth (6 seconds)
  Do it 5–6 times. It actually tells your brain you’re safe.

5. Understand this truth


Most people who “get found out” don’t get ruined.


They:

• get consequences
• feel embarrassed
• but then… the fear is gone

Living scared every day is often worse than facing a problem once.

Is this chatgpt

 

[Deleted member 104510]

Is this chatgpt

No

 

[Deleted member 318951]

Is this chatgpt

I guess so but still its preety good advice