kranerman23123
Luminary
- Joined
- Oct 16, 2022
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Every time im in a group convo with normies I always find myself cringing at literally every single thing the discuss. Like I can not stand the things they say it all feels so tacky and parroted, but its in an asshole way.
Like every thing normies discuss, I almost feel exhausted because I get this feeling like "ive thought about this so much more than you, everything youre all saying right now is something ive already thought its all so basic youre all so below me" and it pisses me off because I hate MYSELF for having such a superiority complex and sense of authority over every single fucking topic like im a 14 yr old chud.
I want to just enjoy the conversation and not think im better than them and im aware im not but I just can't shake these feelings while talking with most people and I think the meanest fucked up cruel thoughts about people in my head the blackpill has completely rotted my soul.
Even when im not deliberately being a complete asshole I am still an asshole. People try and say hello and out of my shyness I completely ignore them or give them a small smirk and look away. From my perspective I just seem shy but from some people's perspective they probsbly think im a complete douche and they sense my air of superiority and so they never say hello to me again because I make them nervous and im unreciprocative.
And I can tell people literally want to be friends with me, they want to get to know me, people come up to me and ask me things about me and want to know all about me and try so hard to make conversations day by day and their effort fizzles as I only talk about myself and never ask them about their hobbies or how theyre doing, and I never say yes when they want to hang and develop some kind of connection. Im so closed off.
And I blame it on being shy but regardless of my reason, it just makes me seem like a self centered asshole. And maybe I am one. Because I have this sense like everyone should want to get to know everything about me before I can build a connection with them, like they need to worship me as this almighty interesting enigma that they want to know all about and then and only then will I open up and talk deeply with them. Its such a little insecure chud way of being.
People just give up trying to talk to me or interact with me because im so awkward I make them so nervous and I blame it on my looks, blame it on being nd, but then I look and realize that the sub5s and the nd people give up interacting with me too. Im just a douchebag and I need to accept it.
Not to mention that my only close friends are slowly moving on in life and are all either really stupid or extremely shitty friends who have wronged me super bad. So this bitterness and loneliness and isolation will just continue to spiral and deepen until im a 30 yr old chud inkwell doomer who hates everyone and every thing. This life is so brutal
Like every thing normies discuss, I almost feel exhausted because I get this feeling like "ive thought about this so much more than you, everything youre all saying right now is something ive already thought its all so basic youre all so below me" and it pisses me off because I hate MYSELF for having such a superiority complex and sense of authority over every single fucking topic like im a 14 yr old chud.
I want to just enjoy the conversation and not think im better than them and im aware im not but I just can't shake these feelings while talking with most people and I think the meanest fucked up cruel thoughts about people in my head the blackpill has completely rotted my soul.
Even when im not deliberately being a complete asshole I am still an asshole. People try and say hello and out of my shyness I completely ignore them or give them a small smirk and look away. From my perspective I just seem shy but from some people's perspective they probsbly think im a complete douche and they sense my air of superiority and so they never say hello to me again because I make them nervous and im unreciprocative.
And I can tell people literally want to be friends with me, they want to get to know me, people come up to me and ask me things about me and want to know all about me and try so hard to make conversations day by day and their effort fizzles as I only talk about myself and never ask them about their hobbies or how theyre doing, and I never say yes when they want to hang and develop some kind of connection. Im so closed off.
And I blame it on being shy but regardless of my reason, it just makes me seem like a self centered asshole. And maybe I am one. Because I have this sense like everyone should want to get to know everything about me before I can build a connection with them, like they need to worship me as this almighty interesting enigma that they want to know all about and then and only then will I open up and talk deeply with them. Its such a little insecure chud way of being.
People just give up trying to talk to me or interact with me because im so awkward I make them so nervous and I blame it on my looks, blame it on being nd, but then I look and realize that the sub5s and the nd people give up interacting with me too. Im just a douchebag and I need to accept it.
Not to mention that my only close friends are slowly moving on in life and are all either really stupid or extremely shitty friends who have wronged me super bad. So this bitterness and loneliness and isolation will just continue to spiral and deepen until im a 30 yr old chud inkwell doomer who hates everyone and every thing. This life is so brutal
