In a way, mild Asperger's can hold a man back more than severe autism

[BadLuck7892]

I know a man with severe autism who has a wife.

Meanwhile, every autist who complains online about bad luck with foids (myself included) simply has mild Asperger's.

You'd expect a severe autist to struggle a lot more than a guy with mild Asperger's. Yet I finally came to the realization of why it is that those of us with mild Asperger's struggle the most.

I will elaborate more on a future post. For now, before I share my hypothesis, I'd like to see if anyone else has any hypotheses.

 

[neurosis]

and this goes for everything in life, not just dating.

aspergers exists in the perpetual grey zone of disability purgatory.

we're functional enough that we get none of the pros (sympathy) from being disabled, whilst getting most of the cons that comes along with a disability . but simultaneously dysfunctional enough to the point we get virtually no pros from not being disabled whilst getting most, if not all of the cons from being expected to be normal but failing miserably.

 

[BadLuck7892]

and this goes for everything in life, not just dating.

aspergers exists in the perpetual grey zone of disability purgatory.

we're functional enough that we get none of the pros (sympathy) from being disabled, whilst getting most of the cons that comes along with a disability . but simultaneously dysfunctional enough to the point we get virtually no pros from not being disabled whilst getting most, if not all of the cons from being expected to be normal but failing miserably.

Your explanation is along the lines of what I was going to say.

As you said, we're mild enough we're expected to be normal.

I've managed to get a decent amount of dates/sex partners, yet I have a hard time keeping a woman.

I never inform a foid of my Asperger's. Since I'm able to pass as NT at first glance, I can simply pretend to be NT to get short-term dates/short-term sex.

Yet as for why I have a hard time keeping a foid: Eventually, my autistic mannerisms shine through. But since she doesn't know I'm an autist, she's totally freaked out. She has no idea why I'm acting the way I'm acting.

With a severely autistic man, it's impossible for him to hide his autism. As a result, the vast majority of foids will be turned off by him. Yet as for the few foids who aren't turned off by autism? He's in luck. He doesn't have to hide his autism from her...she already knows (and is ok with it). He can be his true self around her.

The severely autistic married man I know probably couldn't have gotten any of the short-term dates or short-term casual sex I've gotten. Yet he ended up getting a long-term partner (whereas I ended up becoming a hopeless escortcel as my looks have faded with age). He got the last laugh.

 

[Latinus]

Very interesting thread. Subscribed.

 

[whotthehell]

Mild Asperger is a good thing if anything

 

[BadLuck7892]

Mild Asperger is a good thing if anything

On the surface, it might appear that way.

As another poster pointed out, however, we have a double whammy: Lots of the disadvantages that come with having a disability (a mild disability is still a disability), yet at the same time we're expected to act normal (because of how mild our disability is)

 

[NT Master]

99% of men with a severe disability will never reproduce (men will fuck disabled foids though). Even average men struggle nowadays. You think a disabled man has a shot at having a wife and kids? Severe downies or paraplegics with a happy family are absolute rarities posted on social media to get support and acknowledge how rare it is.

If you had the choice of acting normal or acting like a basket case, what would you honestly pick?

 

[Klasik616]

Atleast 80% male aspies are KVs

 

[Richard Cheese]

Atleast 80% male aspies are KVs

opposite for female ones btw.

 

[BadLuck7892]

99% of men with a severe disability will never reproduce (men will fuck disabled foids though). Even average men struggle nowadays. You think a disabled man has a shot at having a wife and kids? Severe downies or paraplegics with a happy family are absolute rarities posted on social media to get support and acknowledge how rare it is.

If you had the choice of acting normal or acting like a basket case, what would you honestly pick?

If I had the choice, I'd act normal.

As for the severely autistic married man I mentioned on my OP, he doesn't have kids (as far as I know)

 

[pprimus43]

I know a man with severe autism who has a wife.

Meanwhile, every autist who complains online about bad luck with foids (myself included) simply has mild Asperger's.

You'd expect a severe autist to struggle a lot more than a guy with mild Asperger's. Yet I finally came to the realization of why it is that those of us with mild Asperger's struggle the most.

I will elaborate more on a future post. For now, before I share my hypothesis, I'd like to see if anyone else has any hypotheses.

Yeah because we don’t get any leeway

 

[BadLuck7892]

Yeah because we don’t get any leeway

No we don't.

 

[destinedtobetabux]

Is that distinguished gentlemen in your pfp an ai like version of you?

 

[cute]

aspergers isnt even a diagnosis anymore

 

[Tusseleif]

Tag me in your post brah. I have assburgers but struggle heavily with 4/10+ looking girls, even though I get rated well and get many matched. The number of women who match me, respond or not to my opener and then disappear is ridiculous. Not to mention ghosting me before or after a date.

I'd be incel if I didn't dumpster dive tbh. There's something about me that repulse women

 

[Archimedes]

What's the difference?

 

[6ft4]

legit thread I've thought the same
I wonder if you're a geezer I've spoken to on discord before

 

[BadLuck7892]

Is that distinguished gentlemen in your pfp an ai like version of you?

Yeah it is.

 

[BadLuck7892]

aspergers isnt even a diagnosis anymore

I know.

I found out I'm an autist back when they still made the Asperger's distinction. I was told I have Asperger's. A lot of other men are in the same boat as me (found out they had Asperger's back when the medical community still made the distinction)

Regardless, even if psychiatrists don't make the distinction anymore, Asperger's is still a thing.

 

[BadLuck7892]

Tag me in your post brah. I have assburgers but struggle heavily with 4/10+ looking girls, even though I get rated well and get many matched. The number of women who match me, respond or not to my opener and then disappear is ridiculous. Not to mention ghosting me before or after a date.

I'd be incel if I didn't dumpster dive tbh. There's something about me that repulse women

I can relate. Even when I was more successful than I am now at getting free cooch, I had to dumpster dive for some of that cooch.

I've also run into the problem of foids losing interest either before the date even happens or shortly after the 1st date.

And here's the real kicker: Even though my looks have faded somewhat with age, I'm still above-average (6-7)...and I was bordering on 8 in my younger days. Sounds like you have decent looks too...yet still struggle.

 

[cute]

I know.

I found out I'm an autist back when they still made the Asperger's distinction. I was told I have Asperger's. A lot of other men are in the same boat as me (found out they had Asperger's back when the medical community still made the distinction)

Regardless, even if psychiatrists don't make the distinction anymore, Asperger's is still a thing.

Its literally the same thing as autism except the severity, and aspergers was considered more "high functioning" aka less severe than normal autism

 

[BadLuck7892]

What's the difference?

Asperger's is a lot more mild than full blown autism.

It's like comparing HIV to AIDS.

 

[Alias!]

I know a man with severe autism who has a wife.

Meanwhile, every autist who complains online about bad luck with foids (myself included) simply has mild Asperger's.

You'd expect a severe autist to struggle a lot more than a guy with mild Asperger's. Yet I finally came to the realization of why it is that those of us with mild Asperger's struggle the most.

I will elaborate more on a future post. For now, before I share my hypothesis, I'd like to see if anyone else has any hypotheses.

You really pulled. A “ i know a guy”

 

[batman1997]

No It can't stop coping

 

[BadLuck7892]

legit thread I've thought the same
I wonder if you're a geezer I've spoken to on discord before

No. I'm not on discord.

I wouldn't call myself a geezer either (but at 33, I might be a geezer compared to the average age on this forum)

 

[BadLuck7892]

Its literally the same thing as autism except the severity, and aspergers was considered more "high functioning" aka less severe than normal autism

All you've done is make my case.

Asperger's is more high functioning.

 

[cute]

All you've done is make my case.

Asperger's is more high functioning.

Your hypothesis is that higher functioning people suffer more than the lesser functioning ones, without any explanation as to why of course.

 

[BadLuck7892]

Your hypothesis is that higher functioning people suffer more than the lesser functioning ones, without any explanation as to why of course.

I've gone on to explain on a subsequent post after my OP.

I'm not necessarily saying we suffer more overall than the lower-functioning ones. All I'm saying is lower-functioning ones can keep their partner easier than we can

(Because a lower-functioning autist's partner can clearly tell he's autistic right off the bat. If she's willing to get involved with him, that means she's OK with his autism. On the other hand, those of us with high-functioning Asperger's tend to mask our autism as a tactic to get partners. As a result, we tend to get higher body counts than lower-functioning autists, yet have a harder time keeping a partner...because once we inevitably unmask, our partner gets freaked out...because she's under the impression we're NT, therefore she sees no reason for us to act off kilter)

 

[Archimedes]

Asperger's is a lot more mild than full blown autism.

It's like comparing HIV to AIDS.

Interesting. I do think its important to note that even the most autistic dudes you meet almost always were able to make friends and get into relationships with other autists, think the stereotypical weird kids at school (obviously not all of them are actually autistic).

 

[uksucks]

There's a study that approx half of men (age 35 average so half are older), were virgins

 

[BadLuck7892]

Interesting. I do think its important to note that even the most autistic dudes you meet almost always were able to make friends and get into relationships with other autists, think the stereotypical weird kids at school (obviously not all of them are actually autistic).

I'm not sure how accurate your premise is.

I went to school with a kid who was clearly severely autistic. From elementary school all the way through high school, he never had friends. Neither did his severely autistic brother 2 grades behind us.

On the other hand, even though I (mild case of Asperger's) was never the most popular kid, I had some friends at points in my childhood.

 

[BadLuck7892]

There's a study that approx half of men (age 35 average so half are older), were virgins

Half of men on the autism spectrum?

If so, that's a vague study. The autism spectrum includes those with mild Asperger's, the severely autistic who wear diapers for a lifetime, and everything in between.

 

[uksucks]

Half of men on the autism spectrum?

If so, that's a vague study. The autism spectrum includes those with mild Asperger's, the severely autistic who wear diapers for a lifetime, and everything in between.

No just high functioning

 

[BadLuck7892]

No just high functioning

Ok. Sounds realistic (50% of high-functioning autists are virgins)

 

[Bitchwhipper2]

 

[Archimedes]

I'm not sure how accurate your premise is.

I went to school with a kid who was clearly severely autistic. From elementary school all the way through high school, he never had friends. Neither did his severely autistic brother 2 grades behind us.

On the other hand, even though I (mild case of Asperger's) was never the most popular kid, I had some friends at points in my childhood.

Yeah it will come down to trading anecdotes but I personally have seen multiple kids who would universally be considered extremely bizzare having friend groups with other outcasts, by autistic I mean these kids couldn't read any social cues, weird mannerisms, and would act out anime scenes in the lunchroom.

My opinion is that there might be some advantages to not understanding social etiquette AT ALL, mainly that it can actually make some severe autists lower inhib when it comes to making friends / talking to people.

 

[BadLuck7892]

View attachment 3709611

I fit some of the Asperger's meme (not all)

 

[BadLuck7892]

Yeah it will come down to trading anecdotes but I personally have seen multiple kids who would universally be considered extremely bizzare having friend groups with other outcasts, by autistic I mean these kids couldn't read any social cues, weird mannerisms, and would act out anime scenes in the lunchroom.

My opinion is that there might be some advantages to not understanding social etiquette AT ALL, mainly that it can actually make some severe autists lower inhib when it comes to making friends / talking to people.

Ok, you could be onto something.

Those of us with Asperger's have difficulty with cues, yet also have enough self-awareness to know we struggle with cues (which makes us become high inhibition)

On the other hand, a more severe autist might not even know he struggles with cues (so he develops a low inhibition demeanor)