Is this a good plot for a movie?

[Vermilioncore]

The movie starts like a rom com. Some happy go lucky cuck being a funny Adam Sandler/Ben Stiller type character and doing funny stuff while the typical family comedy tropes happen.

Then the wife says “off to work honey!” And leaves the house. The happy goofy music turns off and the movie is now UNSCORED.

The man goes into the garage and pulls two kittens from a bag and brutally bludgeons them to death with a tire iron. (Keep in mind, there’s no musical score and the entire movie completely changed tone, plot, mood, lighting and the character of the guy doesn’t even act the same)

After he kills them, he goes and eats breakfast and browses his phone and the credits roll.

Who’s watching this movie? I know I am!

 

[anthony111553]

don't forget the modern sjw character who is in the trailer a lot but only in the actual movie for 5 minutes

 

[GuyFromSingapore]

Bludgeoning is a little too much but chopping their limbs off and then head cartel style should be enough.

@Banasura

 

[Deleted member 21182]

Too short

 

[NewOneXY]

@FBI

 

[Skywalker]

don't forget the modern sjw character who is in the trailer a lot but only in the actual movie for 5 minutes

this; you need to throw in some blue haired lesbians ,the gay best friend, a trailer with 90% black/ non white people and an australian abo or 2 @Vermilioncore

 

[Deleted member 20399]

Bro why don’t u actually make it? Cannes would go crazy for sure

 

[blacksheep]

The movie starts like a rom com. Some happy go lucky cuck being a funny Adam Sandler/Ben Stiller type character and doing funny stuff while the typical family comedy tropes happen.

Then the wife says “off to work honey!” And leaves the house. The happy goofy music turns off and the movie is now UNSCORED.

The man goes into the garage and pulls two kittens from a bag and brutally bludgeons them to death with a tire iron. (Keep in mind, there’s no musical score and the entire movie completely changed tone, plot, mood, lighting and the character of the guy doesn’t even act the same)

After he kills them, he goes and eats breakfast and browses his phone and the credits roll.

Who’s watching this movie? I know I am!

story needs more depth bro. why is he doing that? why even introduce the wife if she has no significance to the story? also give the audience a reason to root for any of the characters (dude, kittens, wife,...)

 

[Vermilioncore]

story needs more depth bro. why is he doing that? why even introduce the wife if she has no significance to the story? also give the audience a reason to root for any of the characters (dude, kittens, wife,...)

That’s the thing; it’s not a typical movie. It follows no tropes or literary/film guides or story telling; it’s simply a look into what perverted sick minded men do when no one is around

 

[blacksheep]

That’s the thing; it’s not a typical movie. It follows no tropes or literary/film guides or story telling; it’s simply a look into what perverted sick minded men do when no one is around

I'm not saying you have to follow tropes or buy yourself any screenwriting guide. As a film maker you are a story teller, fictional or non-fictional. Story tellers need to keep people hooked on the story or no one will even listen to what you have to say. Does keeping someone hooked mean you have to go Hollywood extravagance and explosions on them? No. The critique I gave you were just points that I believe can be more thought out to not chase your audience away. Also the why-questions I asked you should be easily answered before even starting to write your story. How are you gonna make characters behave and react in certain ways if you yourself don't even know why they are doing it?

 

[IAMNOTANINCEL]

Do you want to produce movies?

 

[Vermilioncore]

Do you want to produce movies?

Yup and you’ll be the first movie star