I've given up my all hope of ascending during my college years.

iamgoingtomakeit

iamgoingtomakeit

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Damn i hated high school with a burning passion. I was always extremely asocial first 2 years of college i only played vidya never bothered to make friends. In junior year i started to lose a bit interest in vidya so i became to feel extremely lonely and bored so i tried to socialmaxx during my last year of college(with very little succes). In summer i would be bored to death while knowing my so called ''friends'' would meet up and do normie things. I was waiting for college to open so that i can better socialmaxx and maybe find gf. I was semi blackpilled so i didnt have huge expectations like everything would become better once im in college. I succeded in socialmaxxing by being a parasite-like to a social guy and being in dorm helped a lot to normiemaxx too. I managed to become semi normie semi schizoid lunatic. Whatever after my first year ended i went back to the city i live in and i realized that i have literally zero friends there. Because i stopped playing vidya 2-3 years ago i didnt care about getting a new pc etc. My pc was extremely old that my graphic card was failed so no vidya too. And i was too schizoid to find a job myself to buy a new pc. I LDAR'ed all summer in my room doing nothing. Towards the end of summer somehow i managed to get my laptop fixed and started playing vidya again. I actually enjoyed the same online game . 3 years ago before i left vidya i became extremely jaded so playing vidya and watching tv series etc didnt give me any joy but after 2 years of not playing games or binge watching tv series i finally started to get satisfaction and joy from playing vidya. Last month of my summer was somehow bearable because of this. I watched many great films and played joyfully my favorite vidya which i spent almost 4000 hours 2 years ago. So i can say that during all the time i mentioned here i was browsing r/incels then incels.me r/braincels truecels etc i realized that my now self will never attract girls. I have to lookmax very hard then i maybe can have a chance but now it really looks impossible. And iam not coming from a rich family so i cant lookmax now. I have to graduate and earn money so that i can invest it into my lookmaxing plans. So what will i do now ? I am just going to normiemaxx , socialcirclemaxx which will help me not look like a weirdo from a college who has 0 friends etc. I will spend my time normiemaxxing and playing vidya again and studying. These are pretty good copes so far. I also stopped gymcelling because i thought that when i graduate i'll spend much of my money to lookmaxing so i cant afford to spend lots of money into gymcelling and food . It would be better to get my lookmaxing done then start becoming a gymcel.
That's it i guess
 
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Reactions: Kristin and Deleted member 6401
your names sugggests otherwise
 
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Reactions: Deleted member 6401
your names sugggests otherwise
i dont think i can ascend in college but after lookmaxing i can hopefully ascend. If i was completely hopeless iwouldve roped by now
 
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Reactions: Kristin, Deleted member 6401 and Deleted member 209
Tldr
 
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i dont think i can ascend in college but after lookmaxing i can hopefully ascend. If i was completely hopeless iwouldve roped by now

Ascend, do it for me
 
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what game did u play
 
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