Beanermaxxer
Kraken
- Joined
- Apr 6, 2020
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“Just mew bro” is finally dead. Literally.
Dr. John Mew (1928–2025), the orthodontist turned cope prophet, has officially been permanently LDARed.
The man who told millions they could tongue their way to hunter eyes and a chad jaw is now six feet under
Old man spent his life convincing birdcels that pushing their tongue against the roof of their mouth would morph them into gigachads.
Died before delivering a single peer-reviewed result btw.
The Mew Manifesto
Dr. John Mew’s entire ideology boiled down to:
Yes. The dental establishment literally exiled him because he was peddling tongue yoga to fix skeletal deformities.
Why It Never Worked (Except Maybe for Toddlers)
-Facial bones stop growing vertically at 16–18. Horizontally? Sooner.
-Tongue pressure isn’t enough to move adult bones.
-Every “mewing transformation” online is actually:
Mewing is the perfect cope. Think about it:
-Requires no money
- Requires no real effort
-You can do it while gaming, rotting, or lying in bed
-Gives you the illusion you’re “working on yourself”
-Delayed results = infinite excuse to never reevaluate
-“You’re not doing it right” = unfalsifiable ideology
-“It takes years!” = unlimited rope to cope
This nigga is the reason of why the PSL space got infested with low IQ TikTok zoomers, in glad he is dead.
#RIPBOZO
Dr. John Mew (1928–2025), the orthodontist turned cope prophet, has officially been permanently LDARed.
The man who told millions they could tongue their way to hunter eyes and a chad jaw is now six feet under
Old man spent his life convincing birdcels that pushing their tongue against the roof of their mouth would morph them into gigachads.
Died before delivering a single peer-reviewed result btw.
The Mew Manifesto
Dr. John Mew’s entire ideology boiled down to:
- Tongue on the roof of your mouth
- Nasal breathing
- Don’t be a mouthbreathing subhuman
- And just wait.
Yes. The dental establishment literally exiled him because he was peddling tongue yoga to fix skeletal deformities.
Why It Never Worked (Except Maybe for Toddlers)
-Facial bones stop growing vertically at 16–18. Horizontally? Sooner.
-Tongue pressure isn’t enough to move adult bones.
-Every “mewing transformation” online is actually:
- Weight loss
- Better lighting
- Better jaw angle/picture tilt
Mewing is the perfect cope. Think about it:
-Requires no money
- Requires no real effort
-You can do it while gaming, rotting, or lying in bed
-Gives you the illusion you’re “working on yourself”
-Delayed results = infinite excuse to never reevaluate
-“You’re not doing it right” = unfalsifiable ideology
-“It takes years!” = unlimited rope to cope
This nigga is the reason of why the PSL space got infested with low IQ TikTok zoomers, in glad he is dead.
#RIPBOZO
