banku don
Silver
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2025
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Life has been going down for a long time
Till the March-April of this year, my life wasn't the best, but it was improving. I was finally decreasing my weight because I was fat for my entire life growing up (typical grown house), my curls were healthy and growing out, finally, for the first time, and I slowly started to enter the blackpill space, and everything was on track when I met HER
My first gf, she lived far away from me in another tier 1 city, but I was okay with it (mostly cause I was fucking desperate) till the time she made time for me and talked to me (jfl), I actually started feeling something for her slowly in may-june I genuinely fell for her HARD, we started to stay on call for fucking 4 hours per day, I gave up everything for her, my studies, my friends, my social life etc. she was actually going thru a summer vacation so her family (her dads networth is $25M) decided to come to my city as a vacation and we were both very excited for it, then at the end of july she came to my city, we met once, I made a DIY black rose for her while she gave me nothing, I had my first kiss with her, after things were going pretty good UNTIL
Late August, I decided to make a dating account with her pictures and see what it's really like for her (she's 14 btw) and made it for all age group, as usual it got 50+ likes within 15 minutes from indian uncles writing cheesy copy-paste pick-up lines like how age dosen't matter (I put her age as 18) which I found very fucking funny idk why I decided to send the creepy, cheesy messages to her, she called me saying "wtf are you doing? are you a fucking psycho wtf dude?" which I did take seriously but she cut the call abruptly cause she wanted to go somewhere, for a while I took it seriously then I was like, "everythings gonna be fine, we're soulmates, we're gonna marry eachother, we're gonna overcum all these obstacles blah balh" so I continued to do my LDAR, till night when I called her I realized she has been crying from the entire morning for what I did, I tried to explain to her I just wanted to joke about how she didn't look her age blah blah but obviously this was a serious topic, no 14 year old would find it funny when 30+ men commented on her body, as a compensation I even wrote 2 pages of why I was grateful that she's in my life but she said she wanted me to do more
Her summer vacation ended, she actually shifted to a new school, and she had told me to give her space, and I did say, "Oh yeah, totally, please make friends and be happy."
and we were still on bad terms, but Idk why I don't take anything seriously, so for a few days it went like that and then she brought up the topic of "break" and I did say that im against that shit and we shouldn't be doing this but she was very admant about this and I actually was on the verge of saying "lets breakup uf we're gonna do this" but I loved her too fucking much to say it and my beta male brain coped with saying "I'm the wrong one over here, so I should accept this" and so I did.
A week goes by, every 2 days I messaged her something reminding her of how much I loved her and I'm there for youfeelswhy:) and she was like yeah yeah, then on the end of the week, I sent her some reel telling "ik we've been going thru tough times but I also do know we're gonna over come blah blah" and to that this bitch basically replies with saying how much she has been happier since we've been stopped talking at that point I was man wtf how can she writes such a rude thing to me knowing its gonna hurt me like a fucking needle, and then we started arguing and then she bought up the topic of breakup and how we should breakup and part ways and holy fuck I never experienced this level of pain in my entire life, I wrotes fucking paragraphs and paragphs on how much I love her and please don't do this, I beg of you to do this please but she didn't listen to me at all, and we brokeup
For the next 10 days, I just tried ways to contact her through my mother's phone number, my father's phone number, my friend's phone number, and my different stalking Instagrams through which I could just talk to her and then on the 10th day she told me about how "she was fucking embarassed of me, of how I looked and how I spoke thats why she never told anyone about me" and also 3 days after the breakup she told me how she's already in a situationship with a pretty good guy then her roomate took her phone and told how nice of a guy she is talking to blah blah and then I confornted her about that and she told me yes I am pursuing him blah blah
I was fucking devastated, dude. This pain I never felt this, I made this chick my entire life, that was my problem, which I did know I shouldn't be doing this but I left my feeling control over me like a beta cuck, and now that my life's most important exams are near like in a damn month, I haven't studied anything like NOTHING I am so fucked, I also stopped looksmaxxing and blackpill after I got her thinking "I alr have a gf so why do I need that stuff"
TLDR
life was going great for the first 4 months, then a girl came, she became my first gf, I made her my everything, spent all my day thinking about her and talking to her, she left me for another guy when she changed schools, my mental health is fucked, my grades are at lowest, I got fat, lost all my hair and no friends
Till the March-April of this year, my life wasn't the best, but it was improving. I was finally decreasing my weight because I was fat for my entire life growing up (typical grown house), my curls were healthy and growing out, finally, for the first time, and I slowly started to enter the blackpill space, and everything was on track when I met HER
My first gf, she lived far away from me in another tier 1 city, but I was okay with it (mostly cause I was fucking desperate) till the time she made time for me and talked to me (jfl), I actually started feeling something for her slowly in may-june I genuinely fell for her HARD, we started to stay on call for fucking 4 hours per day, I gave up everything for her, my studies, my friends, my social life etc. she was actually going thru a summer vacation so her family (her dads networth is $25M) decided to come to my city as a vacation and we were both very excited for it, then at the end of july she came to my city, we met once, I made a DIY black rose for her while she gave me nothing, I had my first kiss with her, after things were going pretty good UNTIL
Late August, I decided to make a dating account with her pictures and see what it's really like for her (she's 14 btw) and made it for all age group, as usual it got 50+ likes within 15 minutes from indian uncles writing cheesy copy-paste pick-up lines like how age dosen't matter (I put her age as 18) which I found very fucking funny idk why I decided to send the creepy, cheesy messages to her, she called me saying "wtf are you doing? are you a fucking psycho wtf dude?" which I did take seriously but she cut the call abruptly cause she wanted to go somewhere, for a while I took it seriously then I was like, "everythings gonna be fine, we're soulmates, we're gonna marry eachother, we're gonna overcum all these obstacles blah balh" so I continued to do my LDAR, till night when I called her I realized she has been crying from the entire morning for what I did, I tried to explain to her I just wanted to joke about how she didn't look her age blah blah but obviously this was a serious topic, no 14 year old would find it funny when 30+ men commented on her body, as a compensation I even wrote 2 pages of why I was grateful that she's in my life but she said she wanted me to do more
Her summer vacation ended, she actually shifted to a new school, and she had told me to give her space, and I did say, "Oh yeah, totally, please make friends and be happy."
and we were still on bad terms, but Idk why I don't take anything seriously, so for a few days it went like that and then she brought up the topic of "break" and I did say that im against that shit and we shouldn't be doing this but she was very admant about this and I actually was on the verge of saying "lets breakup uf we're gonna do this" but I loved her too fucking much to say it and my beta male brain coped with saying "I'm the wrong one over here, so I should accept this" and so I did.A week goes by, every 2 days I messaged her something reminding her of how much I loved her and I'm there for you
feelswhy:) and she was like yeah yeah, then on the end of the week, I sent her some reel telling "ik we've been going thru tough times but I also do know we're gonna over come blah blah" and to that this bitch basically replies with saying how much she has been happier since we've been stopped talking at that point I was man wtf how can she writes such a rude thing to me knowing its gonna hurt me like a fucking needle, and then we started arguing and then she bought up the topic of breakup and how we should breakup and part ways and holy fuck I never experienced this level of pain in my entire life, I wrotes fucking paragraphs and paragphs on how much I love her and please don't do this, I beg of you to do this please but she didn't listen to me at all, and we brokeup For the next 10 days, I just tried ways to contact her through my mother's phone number, my father's phone number, my friend's phone number, and my different stalking Instagrams through which I could just talk to her and then on the 10th day she told me about how "she was fucking embarassed of me, of how I looked and how I spoke thats why she never told anyone about me" and also 3 days after the breakup she told me how she's already in a situationship with a pretty good guy then her roomate took her phone and told how nice of a guy she is talking to blah blah and then I confornted her about that and she told me yes I am pursuing him blah blah
I was fucking devastated, dude. This pain I never felt this, I made this chick my entire life, that was my problem, which I did know I shouldn't be doing this but I left my feeling control over me like a beta cuck, and now that my life's most important exams are near like in a damn month, I haven't studied anything like NOTHING I am so fucked, I also stopped looksmaxxing and blackpill after I got her thinking "I alr have a gf so why do I need that stuff"
TLDR
life was going great for the first 4 months, then a girl came, she became my first gf, I made her my everything, spent all my day thinking about her and talking to her, she left me for another guy when she changed schools, my mental health is fucked, my grades are at lowest, I got fat, lost all my hair and no friends
