H
hotfudge
Iron
- Joined
- Jun 24, 2025
- Posts
- 5
- Reputation
- 4
Today was the first day of school; I thought everything was going to be different. Thought maybe I could be more normal and make new friends. In my third period, it was a class in which I did not know anyone at all. I walked in, and everyone already had their groups. These loud, happy noises I hear from everyone. It made my stomach turn. My heart raced even though no one was paying attention to me. I could not see their stares, but I could feel their gazes. I sat next to four people at the start of class. None of these people were above ltn. I saw the people in their groups play board games and bond with each other as I sat and watched from a distance. I've never felt more lonely. I noticed a girl; she was alt! She looked really good. Stand out. The girl next to me bordered on Sub 3 (This will be important later.) Every glance at this girl, sitting by herself, made my heart flutter. She was beautiful. She stared at the groups, being by herself, like she longed to have company. I eventually had enough courage to go up to her and ask if she wanted to play a board game; my voice had gone soft, like I couldn't speak, close to shaking as I asked. I was brutally denied. I saw the disgust in her face. The tone was disdainful, like she couldn't believe I even had the confidence to ask her. I felt so, so embarrassed. Who did I think I was? Like I was normal. Like I wasn't destined to be alone. I went back to my seat as I got the confidence to ask the girl next to me. She was also alone. I asked once. "Excuse me?" No reply. "Excuse me? Do you want to play a board game with me?" "Ughhh, no." The same voice of disdain and displeasure. Thankfully, the class was close to ending, so I quickly left. Two rejections in less than 5 minutes. Both by 2 Women of different statuses. Maybe if I was better looking, maybe if I wasn't cursed with these genetics, maybe if I was taller, my parents cared for me more. I wouldn't be this disgusting. It's so over.
