lolcow megathread

91302

91302

ride dick LikeaCARN!VAL
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Chance "Wance Chilkins" Wilkins
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King of Akron, Ohio's Very Own.

He's known mainly due to his grotesque appearance due to being born 26 WEEKS EARLY!!!

The lore for this one stemmed from him losing his record deal with "Bender Boy Records"


Him being dropped resulted in a freakout that cemented him as one of the most delusional niggas on earth, he actually believed he was going to make it big with that fucking face.

MusicBizMarty has spent 4 years tormenting this 5'2" goblin, and even went as far as to fight this fuck IRL.


This is particularly brutal as Marty is 6'7" 200 lbs, you can tell by the goblins shrieks of agony this fight was one-sided, and brutal as fuck

Our bud Wance Chilkins stops at nothing to breed with his 3in humpstick, not even age.
He's seen often going after 12-15 y/o bitches on his free time, because he "is 34 but looks 14" in his own words. In an interesting case a woman named "Strawberry Sally" pretended to be a 14y/o, which is irresistible to Cyraxx. With him being an actual retard, he's gullible as fuck. Marty & Sally divised a plan to make Cyraxx molest himself, which worked effortlessly.

You DO NOT want to watch the OG video of him penetrating himself, but in this video you can see him intimately succinng the shit covered ink dispenser, truly a marvel. After realizing Sally was not a 14 yo and NOT interested in breeding with him, he threatened her with murder, and then at a shocking turn of events, grabs the accursed pen and holds it up to his neck and begins to stab himself.


Overall Cyraxx is the epitome of what a retard looks like, and acts like. He's EXTREMELY easy to set off and will argue for hours about nothing

Wings of ICANTTAKETHISSHITNOMORE
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Hailing from Conway, this 500LB fucker plays video games for a "living", better yet anything that will make him money.


As his name suggests, his timeline as a lolcow started with a meltdown stemming from a day full of being streamsnipped and being berated for not getting a gastric bypass in a timely manner.





This 1v1 started because Syndicate was a lot better at COD Zombies than Wings, and since this fat bitch needs something to be known for he belligerently challenges Syndicate to a 1v1.

The 1v1 was a complete lanslide and Wings left that lobby with 3 new assholes, but more notably a fantastic meltdown.


You read that right, this guy wants 12yolds to have the ability to consent to having sex with his fatass. His reasoning


He's traumatized from watching all his classmates lose their virginity to their first love while he rotted on MW2, so now @ 30 yrs old he says shit like this.


An alias trolls made up and reported to news stations. These dumbass news stations believed it w/o fact checking, resulting in brain hemorrhaging posts like this
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I could not find the clip, but this one's pretty simple. He had a black rottweiler and he named it Nigger. He defended himself from being racist by saying "He has a black dog" and that a name is a name, so people shouldn't care his name is Nigger.
His most recent appearance outside of his doublwide trailer was his fight against Boogie
For once in his life, he won a sport (he got mogged by a foreign in first grade), he actually destroyed Boogie. Boogie did not land a single punch and overall did not move during the fight.

This fight also holds the title of being the heaviest fight in the world, with their being at minimum 900 LBS in the ring combined.

DANIEL "VANDERWAAL" LARSON

best for last, this fuck is completely deranged, and has NO touch with reality.
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Yes, his nose is that big...

A well-known singer songwriter/president/dating grace vanderwhaal/speaker/does it fucking all. He claims to only have autism, but his actions suggest his brain is most likely completely fragmented, and probably not in one piece.


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His number #1 obsession, and probably the only reason he wants to lived. Nothing wrong with being a coomer, except the fact that he started liking her when she was 15 on AGT
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On numerous occasions, Daniel is seen speaking about their non-existent relationship, even sending her dick pics, and humping the floor while moaning her name

How Grace Feels about Daniel

Would rather geomaxx than fuck him brutal.


While homeless Daniel had to get his nutt somehow so he resorted to pinterest.
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They featured pictures such as these, to no surprise Grace is there and also Sky Brown another 12 yo he desperately wanted to fuck .

When confronted about the Pinterest account, he claimed he was hacked and didn't even know what the app was.


As 2024 approached, Fine Dining Records asked Daniel how he would go about cp if he was president.

"As long as they're doing it right" JFL :lul::lul::lul::lul:

What about these freaks makes them want anal sex so bad IDK, but here goes this little fucker shoving a pencil up his ass

There are more but there's enough dick itt alr.


I WANTED THIS THREAD TO BE LONGER BUT THERE IS WAY TO MUCH LORE FOR THESE FUCKS


 
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and at the top of the list .org user known as 91302 for effortposting only to have his dogshit thread fail miserably
 
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