jealousngreedy
Iron
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2026
- Posts
- 8
- Reputation
- 3
To start off im 15 so u could argue im jus going thru hormonal bs and also i just started school but im just realizing that idk what makes me happy anymore and its not that nothing makes me happy but going to school after a good while made me see that i fucking hate all the kids in my classes and also i got fucking heightmogged by this 6’6 ogre truly is a halo bc everyone was talking about him. Im a pretty average guy as in height i think in most of my classes im better looking than most bc i have dorks in all my classes. The main thing im getting at is that im also feeling crazy insecurity with this girl ive been talking to all summer and its not that i dont like her maybe bc i like her too much i just see every little detail and its like at school she doesnt wanna be seen near me and i mean shes 2 years apart from me so maybe shes trying to distance herself but we were always open to eachother about stuff so idk but it makes me kinda sad tbh and i dont wanna be a pussy, for reference ive never had problems with girls because i was always a bit of an asshole to most since i was like 8 just bc i always had other things i found more important but for the one time i try to actually have and keep a good emotional connection to one i have these weird feelings and its also bc for me i get extremely jealous even thinking about her around other guys even though i met her family and stuff and shes met mine, i think its mostly bc i havent met most of her friends and she never tries to introduce me to any of them and shes always with them instead of me it makes me feel like im just here for if she wants but she talks to me on a daily basis, i think im just really insecure bc of my height (im 5’9 always wanted to be 6’6) but also it makes me question wether i could even be in a relationship with anybody but a girl thats never even talked to a guy romantically. Ive never been much of a women hater but i for sure have a gender bias but idk if u could say its mysogynistic but i for sure feel like this girl im talking to could be deeply evil and just be trying to hurt me but i always contradict myself when i think about it. To sum things up its mostly about that girl but also i play lots of sports and they dont really satisfy me as much as before with all the time it takes up with practice then i also dont make money like at all which ive been working on the past 2 months so basically i think all of this stuff except for the sports will kinda just crumble eventually and potentially within the year and im scared ill become like depressed and go back to my old habits (it sounds nerdy but i was really insecure b4 and i only cared about looks until i started getting confidence which made my life way better until now). Anyways thanks for reading and lmk what u think i should do if u want updates.
