shikimorilover69
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- Jul 5, 2025
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Tbh uni entrace exams are coming up real soon and idk what to do. My parents has invested so much money into my education, im really privelaged and yet I dont think I can repaied them, maybe all their time and effort will be wasted because I think I may fail the exams and fail uni admissions. Maybe uni isnt end all or be all. But for my parents it is, waht does it matter if I cannot make them proud? Yes theres life to make myself happy. But if I wanted to be happy I probably owuld fuck off and play video games all day, and plus I think it would be hell knowing that other people think i'm a fucking loser. Maybe I can be susccessful in life later and become a politican and startup founder or whatnot. Still, if I dont get into good uni I will never hear it from my family until I get successful, and I dont know how much shame I can bring on my family since i'm the only son, my sisters may be considered more 'successful' than me even though i'm smarter than them, i jsut ahvent put inm the effort. If I fuck up my TMUA and dont lock in on my PS, maybe my life will go downhill unless I take gap year. BUt i cannot live with the shame of having to take a gap year just to get into uni. Theres my friends who seem to instalty get how to solve a problem and are so much smarter, so maybe my mom just thinks i'm smart, I think i'm just really stupid yet im supposed to bear expectations of being smart, even all of my friends think im smart. when i'm not really. im just a dumb piece of shit. Relatively yes im smart but there are tens of thousands of people smarter than me. Does that really make em smart? Im certainly likely not smart enough to get into my dream uni. Wasted the whole eyar doing fuck all. I dont even know how to work hard, so they say and i start to believe it. What counts as worrking hard? My friend study like 10 hours a day and I couldnt posssibly think of doing that. I cannot even read a book. Somehow I get by in life. Maybe I just dont like school and should just drop out. Then my parents who so firmly believe in uni will cut me off and i'm so cooked. And its all or nothing, ill probably droopout of uni if i get good connecitons but have to fucking get in frist. fml. did I have to mention im also khhv? maybe not hugless but def khv. and sub 5? and fat? Reta coming soon me and my friend gonna pin but still. Life is not very good. I dont want to live a life of mediocrity and living in shame.
But who knows, maybe when I wake up one day ill realise what im going through right now aint that deep. I always learned that if i'm aking a decision I should sleep on it because my mood swings can be EXTREMELY volatile. Once I sleep on somethign everything usually sorts itself out. I know that much
Gonna go order some takeout
But who knows, maybe when I wake up one day ill realise what im going through right now aint that deep. I always learned that if i'm aking a decision I should sleep on it because my mood swings can be EXTREMELY volatile. Once I sleep on somethign everything usually sorts itself out. I know that much
Gonna go order some takeout
