carbonprynt
Art of Facade
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2025
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If you are below a MTN, you are fucked. You can try, but your efforts may be in vain. Read away either way. I have made a summarized version for all my challenged friends. You won’t get much just by reading the summary though. High effort post coming through.
1. The Masking Game
What you might not realize is that nobody truly shows their true face. All the popular guys you may know are masking themselves, because that’s the way they become likable. You are left with the choice of being yourself, being authentic, and living happily ever after in a world of sunshine and rainbows. Or you can shove that personality pill up your ass and become a likable person. You need to realize that there is no going back, you are someone new now. You will not allow your personality to be affected by others around you. You will switch between personalities effortlessly and manipulate those around you. And you will succeed.
2. Why being real doesn’t win
Your personality is affected based on three factors: Nature (genetics), Nurture (environment and experiences), and Choices (decisions you make). As you develop, so does your personality, either for the better or the worse. If you grew up as a social reject, your personality is probably unlikable, and you might seem like a weird kid. Depending on how these factors affected you, you lose most of the time because we're all imperfect. with a bunch of racists (I know you don’t need to imagine), your humor would be much more different than some liberal raised boy who goes out to protest for BLM. If you were to remain true to your acquired personality (experiences not genetics) then you would be incompatible with someone who has opposing view points. Your palate is forever limited, and your options are few. This is why your incel personality doesn’t earn you any friends.
3. Building the blueprint
When you walk into a room, what do you notice? Most people can't observe anything, and this is what makes them submissive and controllable. You’re not most people. You need to start seeing patterns. Who’s the talkative one? Who’s the listener? Who’s the guy who everyone thinks is the listener but doesn’t give a shit about what’s being said? Some people just accept their social position, while others aren’t even aware of it. Start reading the room. When you walk into a room, scan it and take notes of each individual character that is contained within. You need to pay attention to each little detail, and in a world full of lies, knowledge is power. Never reveal your cards in the beginning. Get to know everyone else’s.
(The following is a visual example for our visual learners. If you skip this next paragraph, no essential information will be left behind. I still strongly recommend you read through though.)
For an example, imagine yourself going to a new college for the first time. You’ve been assigned a dorm with people you’ve never met before. Right before you do anything, assess what type of people you live with. Posters on walls, clothing choices, snacks on the floor, it all tells a story of the type of person someone may be. If you notice your roommate spends his free time doing extra assignments for class, congrats you’ve been paired with a nerd. If you notice your roommate decides to hit the gym in his free time, congrats you’ve been paired with a gym bro. Whatever the case may be, don’t brush any of their actions aside. Note it down in your head. Everyone has their own secrets, their own true personalities. Some hide it better than others. Observe that. Find out what type of person they truly are.
4. Silence, observation, and setting up
Silence is the best option if you’re ever unsure of group dynamics. Before you learn to talk to others, learn to shut the hell up. Let others do the talking. Most people can’t stand silence, so they automatically fill it up, giving you information. Watch, collect data, and adapt. This is essentially what quiet kids do. They’re quiet by choice, they choose to observe.
At the same time, notice who everyone orbits around. Watch hand movements and facial gestures. Analyze them. Some tell-tale signs of group dynamics are as such. Group leaders usually walk in front of their friends. They’ll fill in silence, and they’ll initiate events. They’ll stand tall and confident, and they won’t feel the need to give you attention when you say something. Yet somehow everyone is craving their attention. When someone makes a joke, you might not realize it, but subconsciously everyone takes a peek at the leader to see if they found it funny. Everyone is constantly fighting for the approval of one person. Everyone but you. If someone doesn’t acknowledge the dominance of a group leader, there is already tension in that group. Take advantage of their weakness and turn it into submissiveness.
We already acknowledged the first step, which is to observe. Once you figure out group dynamics, find out what people are interested in. It doesn’t matter if you hate fishing for the life of you, try it out, and force yourself to go with that one angler in the group. Maybe you hate sushi, force yourself to eat it with that one friend who’s obsessed with Japanese culture. Your actions are silent, but they make an impact. Start spreading your seeds, making plans with one person at a time. It’s hard to kick out the leader on the spot, but if you become likable in the eyes of everyone, it won’t be as hard. Start finding everyone’s interests, note them, and spend time with them. Adopt their personality. I don’t care whether you’re a liberal or a democrat, because for the time being, you’re both. Don’t force yourself to only become friends with those that have your interests. Get interests from others and make it seem to them that you guys are alike in a way.
What I like to think of as target practice are group outliers. You see the sub5 weird kids that are never invited to group gatherings (maybe that’s you), start calling him off to go somewhere 1 on 1. Again, NEVER FOR YOUR INTERESTS, you are only going for him, not for yourself. Once you do this, you’re dividing up the group into different sections. You have friend groups within friend groups. To the entire friend group you might not seem significant, but to those you spend time with, you’ll notice the status they place you in. You’ll walk in front of them, make jokes catered to their personality, and do activities they enjoy. To them you’re a great friend, and a great friend is a great leader.
Before any of you go off to go on a walk with some guy you’re not close with, and spend an hour in silence with them, you need to know a thing or two about confidence.
5. Illusion of confidence
Confidence isn’t real. It’s just an illusion of rhythm. For all you know, I could have no idea what I’m talking about, but you’re invested. You’re listening to a grey right now. But I sound confident. I have you right where I want, because I’ve injected the type of person I want to be in your brain right now. Any assumptions you’ve made of me have been made from only what I’ve decided to tell you so far. And the hand behind at work is really just confidence.
You fake it till you make it. You’ve heard that before. You fake it until you forget you’re faking it. You’ve probably heard that one less. You could be the most pathetic, loser, weak, submissive kid ever known, but you inject what you want into other people. You can either show up to school in shorts and a tee that has a rock band on it, or you can dress casually without attracting attention. You can dye your hair green, or you can hide your messy hair that day with a beanie. Fake everything. Stand up straight, take up space, and hold eye contact. Not so much that you challenge dominance, but enough that you assert your presence. Slow your speech, lower your tone, and never, and I mean NEVER rush what you’re saying. Don’t be anxious to get others to listen to you, speak knowing that they are listening to you.
People don’t check if you’re confident, they check whether YOU think you are. When you have a group of people around you, stay relaxed, posture up, and drink some water. When it’s your turn to speak, don’t slur your tone, speak confidently and slowly, knowing that you’re in control here and people are here to listen to you. Once you place yourself above everyone in your mind, they shift you accordingly.
6. Charisma at work
Charisma falls under the same rules. You’re not fighting for it. You weren’t born with it. However you use it to leach onto the minds of others. You don’t need to be funny, you have to make others think they’re funny. You don’t need stories to tell, you need to give reactions. You know what helps? Looks. Holy shit I could write an essay on how much looks speeds this shit up. All of it. But you don’t have the looks. You’re a pathetic loser trying to gain validation. But so are they. Everyone is just trying to gain validation from each other. So give it out, and get your charisma. When they start talking, tilt your head. You could have no idea what they’re saying, but just do it, because it makes them feel like you’re listening. When they tell a joke, even if it’s the most horrendous shit you’ve heard of, give a chuckle. Show them they’re interesting.
When you start showing others that you care, they feel special. You’re the only person who makes them feel that way. And to you they come back. To you they seek validation from. You might think that’s manipulative, but that’s because you’ve been taught honesty is a moral requirement instead of a social strategy.
7. Expanding on likeability
Sure, now you have some guy thinking you like him, that you genuinely care. He asks you if you want to hang out later, and you say no because nobody wants to hang out with a loser. Blunder. To you this guy is the most interesting person you’ve ever met. It doesn’t matter if you hate to talk to him. The same things apply to him as to everyone else. You remember his name. You remember his hobbies. You remember his habits. At the start you might genuinely despise hanging out with the guy, but as I’ve said before, fake it until you forget that you’re faking it. Keep hanging out with them until it becomes a habit. Until he is no longer a side character. Until you’re now his group leader. Make them believe that you feel important to them, that you care about them. He’ll keep coming back for that validation, and it’s up to you to constantly give that validation. At this point, your personality, your actions, they’re fused with him. You are his emotional companion. At first you might hate it, but later you’ll realize you have access to one more person you can manipulate, one more person under your control. In essence what one might say, you have one more friend. In reality this friendship is really one sided, and you’re just a charismatic manipulator.
8. Emotional camouflage
Everyone deals with emotions differently. People love to say “just be yourself” until “yourself” starts to make them uncomfortable. That’s where your control comes in, pretending to feel nothing, but tweaking exactly how people see you. It depends once again, the Nature, Nurture, and Choices that you use. Everyone falls somewhere between controlled or reactive personalities.
Controlled types are calm by default. They talk in slow motion, relaxed, thinking before they speak. On the other hand, reactive types burn through their words. Every single expression is displayed without a second thought. Of course there’s a spectrum to this. I’ve met people who can literally not be taken out in public. Others have selective mutism. Neither is ideal, but the trick is to identify what exactly you are and to cover your tracks.
If you’re controlled, you are quite literally controlled. People use you because they know you’ll stay silent. However confidence either makes it or breaks it. It’s the difference between being the weird quiet kid or the lone wolf. Apart from the looks, things like your posture, the way you present yourself, as well as your dominance affect this. Straighten up, wear darker clothing that highlights your personality, and don't be afraid to stare others down. You can still stand in the center of the room without staying a word. Don’t sit in the corner to fit the stereotype.
If you’re reactive, direct your energy. Instead of letting your mouth run wild, put a filter on it. Learn to read the room. It is extremely easy to be classified as the annoying kid with this personality. Learn how to balance your words with humor, not senseless corny things which people laugh at to avoid being awkward. You are already given an advantage, you are more sociable, so use it.
In either case, channel your personality. Do not let your determined personality dictate your likability. Socialize with others, but don’t be the one talking. Stand tall but not with ego. Stay quiet but not with shyness. Direct, but make sure to look confident.
If you’d like to, you can think of this as a game of poker. If you are a controller player, win by not revealing anything. If you are reactive, convince others your emotions are honest. Either way, you decide what version of yourself to display to others.
9. Controlling the narrative
At the end of the day, people don’t remember you for who you are. They remember you for how you make them feel. Someone I knew killed themselves last week. The only thing I constantly heard about them was that they had a giant ego. They were remembered by nothing else. So this is the entire game, shaping how others view you.
You don’t necessarily have to lie to be able to manipulate others thoughts, you can simply withhold information. You don’t need to tell them what you do in your free time when you’re home free. Let them fill that in by themselves and they’ll usually fill it in with something better than the truth. The first thing I did was define a character.
Think of yourself like a public figure. Are you mysterious? Charismatic? Confident? Whatever it is, stick with is, and commit to the bit. Practice day and night infront of a mirror. Slightly change your pitch and tone until you master that character. Truly convince yourself this is the new you. You can tell stories to go along with your character. Let others connect the dog. Stay away from your ego in front of others though. Even if you’re joking. I’m being serious man.
Control doesn’t mean to filter what everyone thinks about you. There will inevitably be rumors spreading about you somewhere. However if you look like you don’t care, and deep down you really don’t, there’s not a single thing one can do to get under your skin. If you fumble in front of a group of people, brush it off, act like nothing is wrong. Make them feel awkward for laughing.
Remember that in every interaction you make with someone, there are always two parts to it. What actually happened, and what they think happened. If you can control the latter, the first one stops mattering.
10. Losing yourself
One day, if you get deep down enough, you can lose yourself. You can completely become lost in your different personalities, unable to identify which one is the real you. That’s where people crash, spiral into depression, personality disorder, all of that.
A simple way you can counter this is to build an anchor. Make one singular genuine friend who you can count on. Someone who you can be corny with, talk about anything, without being judged. Someone who you can show your incel side and they wouldn’t care, nor would they tell anyone. Friends like this are hard to come across, so there’s a simpler approach to this.
You can also break your personality into different stones, giving one to each person you know. If you enjoy fishing, have one friend who you regularly go fishing with. If you like anime, find another friend who shares a favorite show with you. If you still play fortnite, find someone who you can relate with in this regard. These are all traits that you may want to hide depending on the personality you’re going for, however when you’re home by yourself, it is important to let your real self shine. Don’t let yourself get lost.
The goal isn’t to erase who you are, it’s to be able to mask that personality with something else, and adapt it based on who you’re with. It’s to be able to control how exactly you’re portraying yourself to others. Don’t chase validation, arrange it in a way that people seek it from you. Become a leader. Choose your destiny, don't let anything be predetermined.
Summary/key-points
Everyone wears a mask, being likable is controlling your mask instead of letting others decide it for you.
“Being yourself” doesn’t always work because your personality is shaped with your development, so sometimes people are just socially incompatible.
The key is to build a version of yourself that you can adapt to any environment.
You must learn to read rooms and people before acting.
Confidence and charisma aren’t something natural, everything is performative.
The point isn’t to lie, it’s to control the truth, a game of knowledge.
Mastering your emotions will keep what benefits you and hiding everything else.
To stay likeable, give others validation. This is about others not about you.
Balance yourself out, don’t forget who's under the mask. Take the mask off when you get home.
End points
Don’t read this post as if I’m some sort of philosopher. This is what worked for me. Most of this is scientifically backed up, however there are some parts in here that are exaggerated to fit into the narrative, however will still end up working. The trick is to just figure out something that works out for you. Carbonprynt out.
The Art of Facade
1. The Masking Game
What you might not realize is that nobody truly shows their true face. All the popular guys you may know are masking themselves, because that’s the way they become likable. You are left with the choice of being yourself, being authentic, and living happily ever after in a world of sunshine and rainbows. Or you can shove that personality pill up your ass and become a likable person. You need to realize that there is no going back, you are someone new now. You will not allow your personality to be affected by others around you. You will switch between personalities effortlessly and manipulate those around you. And you will succeed.
2. Why being real doesn’t win
Your personality is affected based on three factors: Nature (genetics), Nurture (environment and experiences), and Choices (decisions you make). As you develop, so does your personality, either for the better or the worse. If you grew up as a social reject, your personality is probably unlikable, and you might seem like a weird kid. Depending on how these factors affected you, you lose most of the time because we're all imperfect. with a bunch of racists (I know you don’t need to imagine), your humor would be much more different than some liberal raised boy who goes out to protest for BLM. If you were to remain true to your acquired personality (experiences not genetics) then you would be incompatible with someone who has opposing view points. Your palate is forever limited, and your options are few. This is why your incel personality doesn’t earn you any friends.
3. Building the blueprint
When you walk into a room, what do you notice? Most people can't observe anything, and this is what makes them submissive and controllable. You’re not most people. You need to start seeing patterns. Who’s the talkative one? Who’s the listener? Who’s the guy who everyone thinks is the listener but doesn’t give a shit about what’s being said? Some people just accept their social position, while others aren’t even aware of it. Start reading the room. When you walk into a room, scan it and take notes of each individual character that is contained within. You need to pay attention to each little detail, and in a world full of lies, knowledge is power. Never reveal your cards in the beginning. Get to know everyone else’s.
(The following is a visual example for our visual learners. If you skip this next paragraph, no essential information will be left behind. I still strongly recommend you read through though.)
For an example, imagine yourself going to a new college for the first time. You’ve been assigned a dorm with people you’ve never met before. Right before you do anything, assess what type of people you live with. Posters on walls, clothing choices, snacks on the floor, it all tells a story of the type of person someone may be. If you notice your roommate spends his free time doing extra assignments for class, congrats you’ve been paired with a nerd. If you notice your roommate decides to hit the gym in his free time, congrats you’ve been paired with a gym bro. Whatever the case may be, don’t brush any of their actions aside. Note it down in your head. Everyone has their own secrets, their own true personalities. Some hide it better than others. Observe that. Find out what type of person they truly are.
4. Silence, observation, and setting up
Silence is the best option if you’re ever unsure of group dynamics. Before you learn to talk to others, learn to shut the hell up. Let others do the talking. Most people can’t stand silence, so they automatically fill it up, giving you information. Watch, collect data, and adapt. This is essentially what quiet kids do. They’re quiet by choice, they choose to observe.
At the same time, notice who everyone orbits around. Watch hand movements and facial gestures. Analyze them. Some tell-tale signs of group dynamics are as such. Group leaders usually walk in front of their friends. They’ll fill in silence, and they’ll initiate events. They’ll stand tall and confident, and they won’t feel the need to give you attention when you say something. Yet somehow everyone is craving their attention. When someone makes a joke, you might not realize it, but subconsciously everyone takes a peek at the leader to see if they found it funny. Everyone is constantly fighting for the approval of one person. Everyone but you. If someone doesn’t acknowledge the dominance of a group leader, there is already tension in that group. Take advantage of their weakness and turn it into submissiveness.
We already acknowledged the first step, which is to observe. Once you figure out group dynamics, find out what people are interested in. It doesn’t matter if you hate fishing for the life of you, try it out, and force yourself to go with that one angler in the group. Maybe you hate sushi, force yourself to eat it with that one friend who’s obsessed with Japanese culture. Your actions are silent, but they make an impact. Start spreading your seeds, making plans with one person at a time. It’s hard to kick out the leader on the spot, but if you become likable in the eyes of everyone, it won’t be as hard. Start finding everyone’s interests, note them, and spend time with them. Adopt their personality. I don’t care whether you’re a liberal or a democrat, because for the time being, you’re both. Don’t force yourself to only become friends with those that have your interests. Get interests from others and make it seem to them that you guys are alike in a way.
What I like to think of as target practice are group outliers. You see the sub5 weird kids that are never invited to group gatherings (maybe that’s you), start calling him off to go somewhere 1 on 1. Again, NEVER FOR YOUR INTERESTS, you are only going for him, not for yourself. Once you do this, you’re dividing up the group into different sections. You have friend groups within friend groups. To the entire friend group you might not seem significant, but to those you spend time with, you’ll notice the status they place you in. You’ll walk in front of them, make jokes catered to their personality, and do activities they enjoy. To them you’re a great friend, and a great friend is a great leader.
Before any of you go off to go on a walk with some guy you’re not close with, and spend an hour in silence with them, you need to know a thing or two about confidence.
5. Illusion of confidence
Confidence isn’t real. It’s just an illusion of rhythm. For all you know, I could have no idea what I’m talking about, but you’re invested. You’re listening to a grey right now. But I sound confident. I have you right where I want, because I’ve injected the type of person I want to be in your brain right now. Any assumptions you’ve made of me have been made from only what I’ve decided to tell you so far. And the hand behind at work is really just confidence.
You fake it till you make it. You’ve heard that before. You fake it until you forget you’re faking it. You’ve probably heard that one less. You could be the most pathetic, loser, weak, submissive kid ever known, but you inject what you want into other people. You can either show up to school in shorts and a tee that has a rock band on it, or you can dress casually without attracting attention. You can dye your hair green, or you can hide your messy hair that day with a beanie. Fake everything. Stand up straight, take up space, and hold eye contact. Not so much that you challenge dominance, but enough that you assert your presence. Slow your speech, lower your tone, and never, and I mean NEVER rush what you’re saying. Don’t be anxious to get others to listen to you, speak knowing that they are listening to you.
People don’t check if you’re confident, they check whether YOU think you are. When you have a group of people around you, stay relaxed, posture up, and drink some water. When it’s your turn to speak, don’t slur your tone, speak confidently and slowly, knowing that you’re in control here and people are here to listen to you. Once you place yourself above everyone in your mind, they shift you accordingly.
6. Charisma at work
Charisma falls under the same rules. You’re not fighting for it. You weren’t born with it. However you use it to leach onto the minds of others. You don’t need to be funny, you have to make others think they’re funny. You don’t need stories to tell, you need to give reactions. You know what helps? Looks. Holy shit I could write an essay on how much looks speeds this shit up. All of it. But you don’t have the looks. You’re a pathetic loser trying to gain validation. But so are they. Everyone is just trying to gain validation from each other. So give it out, and get your charisma. When they start talking, tilt your head. You could have no idea what they’re saying, but just do it, because it makes them feel like you’re listening. When they tell a joke, even if it’s the most horrendous shit you’ve heard of, give a chuckle. Show them they’re interesting.
When you start showing others that you care, they feel special. You’re the only person who makes them feel that way. And to you they come back. To you they seek validation from. You might think that’s manipulative, but that’s because you’ve been taught honesty is a moral requirement instead of a social strategy.
7. Expanding on likeability
Sure, now you have some guy thinking you like him, that you genuinely care. He asks you if you want to hang out later, and you say no because nobody wants to hang out with a loser. Blunder. To you this guy is the most interesting person you’ve ever met. It doesn’t matter if you hate to talk to him. The same things apply to him as to everyone else. You remember his name. You remember his hobbies. You remember his habits. At the start you might genuinely despise hanging out with the guy, but as I’ve said before, fake it until you forget that you’re faking it. Keep hanging out with them until it becomes a habit. Until he is no longer a side character. Until you’re now his group leader. Make them believe that you feel important to them, that you care about them. He’ll keep coming back for that validation, and it’s up to you to constantly give that validation. At this point, your personality, your actions, they’re fused with him. You are his emotional companion. At first you might hate it, but later you’ll realize you have access to one more person you can manipulate, one more person under your control. In essence what one might say, you have one more friend. In reality this friendship is really one sided, and you’re just a charismatic manipulator.
8. Emotional camouflage
Everyone deals with emotions differently. People love to say “just be yourself” until “yourself” starts to make them uncomfortable. That’s where your control comes in, pretending to feel nothing, but tweaking exactly how people see you. It depends once again, the Nature, Nurture, and Choices that you use. Everyone falls somewhere between controlled or reactive personalities.
Controlled types are calm by default. They talk in slow motion, relaxed, thinking before they speak. On the other hand, reactive types burn through their words. Every single expression is displayed without a second thought. Of course there’s a spectrum to this. I’ve met people who can literally not be taken out in public. Others have selective mutism. Neither is ideal, but the trick is to identify what exactly you are and to cover your tracks.
If you’re controlled, you are quite literally controlled. People use you because they know you’ll stay silent. However confidence either makes it or breaks it. It’s the difference between being the weird quiet kid or the lone wolf. Apart from the looks, things like your posture, the way you present yourself, as well as your dominance affect this. Straighten up, wear darker clothing that highlights your personality, and don't be afraid to stare others down. You can still stand in the center of the room without staying a word. Don’t sit in the corner to fit the stereotype.
If you’re reactive, direct your energy. Instead of letting your mouth run wild, put a filter on it. Learn to read the room. It is extremely easy to be classified as the annoying kid with this personality. Learn how to balance your words with humor, not senseless corny things which people laugh at to avoid being awkward. You are already given an advantage, you are more sociable, so use it.
In either case, channel your personality. Do not let your determined personality dictate your likability. Socialize with others, but don’t be the one talking. Stand tall but not with ego. Stay quiet but not with shyness. Direct, but make sure to look confident.
If you’d like to, you can think of this as a game of poker. If you are a controller player, win by not revealing anything. If you are reactive, convince others your emotions are honest. Either way, you decide what version of yourself to display to others.
9. Controlling the narrative
At the end of the day, people don’t remember you for who you are. They remember you for how you make them feel. Someone I knew killed themselves last week. The only thing I constantly heard about them was that they had a giant ego. They were remembered by nothing else. So this is the entire game, shaping how others view you.
You don’t necessarily have to lie to be able to manipulate others thoughts, you can simply withhold information. You don’t need to tell them what you do in your free time when you’re home free. Let them fill that in by themselves and they’ll usually fill it in with something better than the truth. The first thing I did was define a character.
Think of yourself like a public figure. Are you mysterious? Charismatic? Confident? Whatever it is, stick with is, and commit to the bit. Practice day and night infront of a mirror. Slightly change your pitch and tone until you master that character. Truly convince yourself this is the new you. You can tell stories to go along with your character. Let others connect the dog. Stay away from your ego in front of others though. Even if you’re joking. I’m being serious man.
Control doesn’t mean to filter what everyone thinks about you. There will inevitably be rumors spreading about you somewhere. However if you look like you don’t care, and deep down you really don’t, there’s not a single thing one can do to get under your skin. If you fumble in front of a group of people, brush it off, act like nothing is wrong. Make them feel awkward for laughing.
Remember that in every interaction you make with someone, there are always two parts to it. What actually happened, and what they think happened. If you can control the latter, the first one stops mattering.
10. Losing yourself
One day, if you get deep down enough, you can lose yourself. You can completely become lost in your different personalities, unable to identify which one is the real you. That’s where people crash, spiral into depression, personality disorder, all of that.
A simple way you can counter this is to build an anchor. Make one singular genuine friend who you can count on. Someone who you can be corny with, talk about anything, without being judged. Someone who you can show your incel side and they wouldn’t care, nor would they tell anyone. Friends like this are hard to come across, so there’s a simpler approach to this.
You can also break your personality into different stones, giving one to each person you know. If you enjoy fishing, have one friend who you regularly go fishing with. If you like anime, find another friend who shares a favorite show with you. If you still play fortnite, find someone who you can relate with in this regard. These are all traits that you may want to hide depending on the personality you’re going for, however when you’re home by yourself, it is important to let your real self shine. Don’t let yourself get lost.
The goal isn’t to erase who you are, it’s to be able to mask that personality with something else, and adapt it based on who you’re with. It’s to be able to control how exactly you’re portraying yourself to others. Don’t chase validation, arrange it in a way that people seek it from you. Become a leader. Choose your destiny, don't let anything be predetermined.
Summary/key-points
Everyone wears a mask, being likable is controlling your mask instead of letting others decide it for you.
“Being yourself” doesn’t always work because your personality is shaped with your development, so sometimes people are just socially incompatible.
The key is to build a version of yourself that you can adapt to any environment.
You must learn to read rooms and people before acting.
Confidence and charisma aren’t something natural, everything is performative.
The point isn’t to lie, it’s to control the truth, a game of knowledge.
Mastering your emotions will keep what benefits you and hiding everything else.
To stay likeable, give others validation. This is about others not about you.
Balance yourself out, don’t forget who's under the mask. Take the mask off when you get home.
End points
Don’t read this post as if I’m some sort of philosopher. This is what worked for me. Most of this is scientifically backed up, however there are some parts in here that are exaggerated to fit into the narrative, however will still end up working. The trick is to just figure out something that works out for you. Carbonprynt out.
.
