honky
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The ex-officer is currently facing charges of second-degree murder, third-degree murder and manslaughter in Floyd’s death. The day after his arrest in May, Kellie Chauvin filed for divorce citing that "there has been an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage relationship of the parties within the definition of" Minnesota statutes. She also indicated her intention to change her name.
The interracial nature of the Chauvins’ marriage has also stirred up some strong feelings towards Kellie Chauvin from many, including Asian American men, for her relationship to a white man, including accusations of self-loathing and complicity with white supremacy.
Some on the internet have labeled her a “self-hating Asian.” Others have concluded her marriage was a tool to gain social standing in the U.S., and several social media users on Asian American message boards dominated by men have dubbed her a “Lu,” a slang term often used to describe Asian women who are in relationships with white men as a form of white worship.
Many experts feel the reaction is symptomatic of attitudes that many in the community, especially certain men, have held toward women in interracial relationships, particularly with white men. It’s the unfortunate result of a complicated, layered web spun from the historical emasculation of Asian men, fetishization of Asian women and the collision of sexism and racism in the U.S.
He said the collision of sexism and racism has made it so that there’s a stricter, more unfair dynamic placed on Asian American women.
The burden placed on Asian American women to date within their own race also presents another problematic idea: that women are still thought of as property, Choimorrow noted. It’s just another form of toxic masculinity, she said, as the expectation that Asian women date Asian men means there is no agency in their dating choices. It’s a mentality that has been inherited through our heritages, she said.
“Even in Korea, as a woman, your value isn't so much as you are marriageable,” she said. “So many of our cultures have these things very deeply ingrained in the way we value and think about women.”
Little has changed, Choimorrow believes. Even as many Asian Americans continue to fight for racial justice, some ideas have been slow to evolve.
“Especially in the progressive circles, they're focused on their oppression as a racial minority, that they often don't think about what they're perpetuating as men,” she said.
The undue pressure toward Asian American women to “fix” the existing structures is not productive in helping mend the reductive perceptions of Asian men, Ocampo said.
Simply put, “You don't need to subjugate women, including Asian women, to feel sexy. That's just f------ lame.”
Dhingra is adamant that no assumptions should be made about any couple’s racial dynamic, particularly if there’s no personal connection to the couple. But he also emphasized that people need to push back on the perpetuation of the problematic ideas in society that devalue Asian Americans while upholding whiteness.
Ocampo had similar thoughts, explaining that more people should be demanding more complicated Asian male characters on screen, rather than those who fit “some perfectly chiseled IG model aesthetic,” he said, referencing carefully curated photos from models on Instagram.
While there are many social reasons for why we value whiteness that Dhingra said are “pretty messed up,” Asian Americans should seek to dismantle them and thus “get to the point where we have more confidence when people do form interracial relationships, because we actually care about that particular individual as a person.”
