ElySioNs
Mercenary
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2021
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Hi all. Could use some thoughts/advice from the community.
During a recent fight/argument over our sex life, my wife confessed that she has been sexually attracted to dogs since adolescence and is not particularly attracted to men. This was shocking news to me, as we've been together since high school and married over a year. Obviously, we've been sexually intimate, but apparently she's always had to think about a dog to get into it. On the one hand, I am not entirely surprised, since she's always seemed a bit "absent" during sex, which has been relatively sporadic for most of our relationship (and hence the fight that started all this). Yet, I can't say I saw anything like this in the cards and it's been a hurtful discovery to process.
Despite the pain/conflict, I've encouraged my wife to open up to me about her feelings, figuring that we need to talk through and understand this together, not avoid it. At first, she was very tight-lipped and didn't want to say much. But then I started asking her about specific dogs we might see on the street. Does she think he's attractive? What is it about him she likes or doesn't like? Is he the sort of dog she'd want to have sex with? Those sorts of of questions seemed to open her up. I probably learned more than I wanted to, but she's become pretty forthcoming and voluntarily mentions things to me. She showed me a stash of pictures she had hidden away on our computer. Not really porn per say, but photos of big male dogs / genitals. We've even talked about her being with dogs during sex. While it certainly seems to have ignited the passion in her that was always missing and makes me excited at the time, I get hit by deep pangs of jealousy after the fact.
Anyway, the talk has shifted from fantasy to actually doing it. I guess she mistook my excitement talking about it in bed for outright acceptance of her trying it in real life. I would consider telling her right off the bat that I'm not fully comfortable, but she has expressed how hard it has been to repress her desires for so long and has been waiting her whole life for this to happen. She's also made clear that it is as much an emotional desire/attraction as a physical one, and so it's not just pleasure and sex she's after (can a woman fall in love with a dog? stupid question?). That makes me feel both better and worse. At any rate, I don't think I'm ready to "veto" anything until I understand better what this could all mean for her, me, and our relationship.
Can anyone here relate to this situation? Thoughts/advice don't have to come from a zoophile/bestiality perspective. I suspect spouses's whose partners have sex with other people may have a similar perspective.
During a recent fight/argument over our sex life, my wife confessed that she has been sexually attracted to dogs since adolescence and is not particularly attracted to men. This was shocking news to me, as we've been together since high school and married over a year. Obviously, we've been sexually intimate, but apparently she's always had to think about a dog to get into it. On the one hand, I am not entirely surprised, since she's always seemed a bit "absent" during sex, which has been relatively sporadic for most of our relationship (and hence the fight that started all this). Yet, I can't say I saw anything like this in the cards and it's been a hurtful discovery to process.
Despite the pain/conflict, I've encouraged my wife to open up to me about her feelings, figuring that we need to talk through and understand this together, not avoid it. At first, she was very tight-lipped and didn't want to say much. But then I started asking her about specific dogs we might see on the street. Does she think he's attractive? What is it about him she likes or doesn't like? Is he the sort of dog she'd want to have sex with? Those sorts of of questions seemed to open her up. I probably learned more than I wanted to, but she's become pretty forthcoming and voluntarily mentions things to me. She showed me a stash of pictures she had hidden away on our computer. Not really porn per say, but photos of big male dogs / genitals. We've even talked about her being with dogs during sex. While it certainly seems to have ignited the passion in her that was always missing and makes me excited at the time, I get hit by deep pangs of jealousy after the fact.
Anyway, the talk has shifted from fantasy to actually doing it. I guess she mistook my excitement talking about it in bed for outright acceptance of her trying it in real life. I would consider telling her right off the bat that I'm not fully comfortable, but she has expressed how hard it has been to repress her desires for so long and has been waiting her whole life for this to happen. She's also made clear that it is as much an emotional desire/attraction as a physical one, and so it's not just pleasure and sex she's after (can a woman fall in love with a dog? stupid question?). That makes me feel both better and worse. At any rate, I don't think I'm ready to "veto" anything until I understand better what this could all mean for her, me, and our relationship.
Can anyone here relate to this situation? Thoughts/advice don't have to come from a zoophile/bestiality perspective. I suspect spouses's whose partners have sex with other people may have a similar perspective.
