Gaygymmaxx
Soul Trap Pilled. The devil is god.
- Joined
- Mar 7, 2022
- Posts
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it didnt hit me how badly he destroyed me until we had a conversation yesterday
we were discussing how cliche a certain conversation in an anime we were watching was, and he went into the ideological social dynamics that while these archtypes are exaggerated, they are prescent in real life, and he likes to think about them and analyze people based on their traits.
basically just some uneccesary high iq shit, sounds kinda schizo own but this is what made me realize that hes so much fucking smarter than me. it pisses me off.
hes also an extremely talented rapper with mostly joke songs out, his lyricism is literally eminem tier, like its so good to compare him to anyone else would be innadequete
hes a social autist genius.
he really has a career, from nothing, from sitting around and writing raps for fun while smoking weed and doing drugs. i had to work hard to change my life and hes fucking set.
dropped out of college twice because he was unmotivated, went to rehab twice, and hes clear reguardless.
i saw it as nothing but a setback before, it destroyed my motivation and likely stunted my growth (reguardless if you think weed stunts growth, it encoursages a sedentary lifestyle, which certainly does_
i quit soccer shortly after, i started hanging out with other drug users and was the "weed guy" IN MIDDLE SCHOOL
he gave me coke at 15, he gave me adderall at 15, acid over a dozen times, these were never addictions for me so i doubt they contributed
after all that he got 95th percentile on his SAT and a very solid IQ i forgot the number tho.
our mother is almost retarded, like 20iq points from needing a personal assistant to keep her alive. she is so dumb
so its possible i just got cucked from genetics cuz shes also 5"
maybe i just got the short dumb genetics. how funny would that be?
one of these days when he pisses me off im gonna let loose and fry him thoroughly and make this nigga cry from remorse
im kinda over it but wanted to vent i asceneded pretty hard and changed things.
i dont need hate him, but i need to clear the air eventually so he apologizes properly. i know hes sorry, but he only said it once when he was high asf from boofing MDMA (boofing = anal application jfl)
i think id feel better if he knows how much he really did.
the idea i need my brother to validate that he provided me with adversity is kinda pussy shit i cant lie. sounds like a pity party, maybe if he says hes had a harder life or some shit id bring it up and let loose. im not sure why this still matters to me.
hes 5"9 social autist never been active no motivation 95th percentile brainpower
im 5"6 solid physique and semi non NT with good motivation 77th percentile
also my parents spent 15-20k on legal fees for him gettign caught with drugs, court, rehab, and probably much more after he dropped out of college twice
i asked my parents for a few grand to buy me pharma HGH. i had a doctor that would give it to me, but they said they wouldnt pay for it.
"we'll pay for half it"
(changed their mind after the price jfl)
a sonic drive in employee at 15 years old cannot afford even 1/10th of pharma hgh
if my brother didnt drain their finances they could have bought it for me. i wasnt low inhib enough to direclty make the comparison and expose their "favoritism"
it wasnt favoritism though. no chance in hell hes the favorite, not like i give a shit, the approval of my parents to me is equavlent to the approval of one of my boys. i dont give a shit what they think. they arent bad people or anything. they just dont get it.
and when they found out i was gonna be 5"5.5 based on my growth charts, the extend of their attempts to change things was:
"wow thats short, should we do something about it??"
doctor: no hes fine
"ok well i wont even think about it for the next 15 years until my son obviously becomes insecure from being literally genetically inferior"
that was it, a single conversation when i was under the age of 5
i also didnt have much of an appetite, so they just let me not eat and fuck off.
instead it took me another year of coping to finally find good hgh online and test it myself
a full year of growth wasted.
they spent tens of thousands on problems that my brother caused to himself
and wouldnt spare more than 50 dollars a month for the hgh i found online and that they KNEW to be real (blood test) i had to lower the dose because they still werent willing to pay for what would be the equivalent of pharma doses even with the blackmarket hgh i found.
im not depressed or anything, i dont fret over it often. but im getting more pissed off than i thought id be writing this.
more than i usually share what does the gang think of my backstory?
we were discussing how cliche a certain conversation in an anime we were watching was, and he went into the ideological social dynamics that while these archtypes are exaggerated, they are prescent in real life, and he likes to think about them and analyze people based on their traits.
basically just some uneccesary high iq shit, sounds kinda schizo own but this is what made me realize that hes so much fucking smarter than me. it pisses me off.
hes also an extremely talented rapper with mostly joke songs out, his lyricism is literally eminem tier, like its so good to compare him to anyone else would be innadequete
hes a social autist genius.
he really has a career, from nothing, from sitting around and writing raps for fun while smoking weed and doing drugs. i had to work hard to change my life and hes fucking set.
dropped out of college twice because he was unmotivated, went to rehab twice, and hes clear reguardless.
i saw it as nothing but a setback before, it destroyed my motivation and likely stunted my growth (reguardless if you think weed stunts growth, it encoursages a sedentary lifestyle, which certainly does_
i quit soccer shortly after, i started hanging out with other drug users and was the "weed guy" IN MIDDLE SCHOOL
he gave me coke at 15, he gave me adderall at 15, acid over a dozen times, these were never addictions for me so i doubt they contributed
after all that he got 95th percentile on his SAT and a very solid IQ i forgot the number tho.
our mother is almost retarded, like 20iq points from needing a personal assistant to keep her alive. she is so dumb
so its possible i just got cucked from genetics cuz shes also 5"
maybe i just got the short dumb genetics. how funny would that be?
one of these days when he pisses me off im gonna let loose and fry him thoroughly and make this nigga cry from remorse
im kinda over it but wanted to vent i asceneded pretty hard and changed things.
i dont need hate him, but i need to clear the air eventually so he apologizes properly. i know hes sorry, but he only said it once when he was high asf from boofing MDMA (boofing = anal application jfl)
i think id feel better if he knows how much he really did.
the idea i need my brother to validate that he provided me with adversity is kinda pussy shit i cant lie. sounds like a pity party, maybe if he says hes had a harder life or some shit id bring it up and let loose. im not sure why this still matters to me.
hes 5"9 social autist never been active no motivation 95th percentile brainpower
im 5"6 solid physique and semi non NT with good motivation 77th percentile
also my parents spent 15-20k on legal fees for him gettign caught with drugs, court, rehab, and probably much more after he dropped out of college twice
i asked my parents for a few grand to buy me pharma HGH. i had a doctor that would give it to me, but they said they wouldnt pay for it.
"we'll pay for half it"
(changed their mind after the price jfl)
a sonic drive in employee at 15 years old cannot afford even 1/10th of pharma hgh
if my brother didnt drain their finances they could have bought it for me. i wasnt low inhib enough to direclty make the comparison and expose their "favoritism"
it wasnt favoritism though. no chance in hell hes the favorite, not like i give a shit, the approval of my parents to me is equavlent to the approval of one of my boys. i dont give a shit what they think. they arent bad people or anything. they just dont get it.
and when they found out i was gonna be 5"5.5 based on my growth charts, the extend of their attempts to change things was:
"wow thats short, should we do something about it??"
doctor: no hes fine
"ok well i wont even think about it for the next 15 years until my son obviously becomes insecure from being literally genetically inferior"
that was it, a single conversation when i was under the age of 5
i also didnt have much of an appetite, so they just let me not eat and fuck off.
instead it took me another year of coping to finally find good hgh online and test it myself
a full year of growth wasted.
they spent tens of thousands on problems that my brother caused to himself
and wouldnt spare more than 50 dollars a month for the hgh i found online and that they KNEW to be real (blood test) i had to lower the dose because they still werent willing to pay for what would be the equivalent of pharma doses even with the blackmarket hgh i found.
im not depressed or anything, i dont fret over it often. but im getting more pissed off than i thought id be writing this.
more than i usually share what does the gang think of my backstory?
@garoupilled_
@looksmidder
@curlyheadjames
@Blackgymmax
@balding exprettyboy @nims @freakkforlife @predeterminism @thompsonz @failednormiemanlet @the bull @vermilioncore @xangsane @lihito @growth plate @rupert Pupkin @8pslcel ...
@TRUE_CEL
@Nims
@FreakkForLife
@predeterminism
@BoredPrince
@thompsonz
@FailedNormieManlet
@the BULL
@Vermilioncore
@Xangsane
@Lihito
@Growth Plate
@rupert Pupkin
@8pslcel
@printerandfaxmachin
@rooman
@predeterminism
@FailedNormieManlet
@FreakkForLife
@Predeterminism
@FailedNormieManlet
@the BULL
@Vermilioncore
@Xangsane
@Lihito
@Growth Plate@Erik-Jón
@Manchild
@8PSLcel
@RecessedChinCel
@Ryan
@gamma
@luljankybo
@Nameless_Sunflower
@
@FreakkForLife
@Hiraeth
@balding exprettyboy
@predeterminism
@thompsonz
@FailedNormieManlet
@the BULL
@Vermilioncore
@Xangsane
@Lihito
@Growth Plate
@rupert Pupkin
@8pslcel
@printerandfaxmachin
@alriodai
@RecessedChinCel
@nameless_sunflower
@gamma
@smvmaxxertilllate
@TeenAscender
@robobafett999
@StuffedFrog
@rand anon
@Spike the dragon
@OnlyWs
@vaninskybird
@St.TikTokcel
@elegant567
@Guerrilla
@St.TikTokcel
@gribsufer1@Crestfallen95
@Blackgymmax
@balding exprettyboy @nims @freakkforlife @predeterminism @thompsonz @failednormiemanlet @the bull @vermilioncore @xangsane @lihito @growth plate @rupert Pupkin @8pslcel ...
@TRUE_CEL
@Allornothing
@balding exprettyboy@Nims
@FreakkForLife
@predeterminism
@BoredPrince
@thompsonz
@FailedNormieManlet
@the BULL
@Vermilioncore
@Xangsane
@Lihito
@Growth Plate
@rupert Pupkin
@8pslcel
@printerandfaxmachin
@rooman
@predeterminism
@FailedNormieManlet
@FreakkForLife
@Predeterminism
@FailedNormieManlet
@the BULL
@Vermilioncore
@Xangsane
@Lihito
@Growth Plate@Erik-Jón
@Manchild
@8PSLcel
@RecessedChinCel
@Ryan
@gamma
@luljankybo
@Nameless_Sunflower
@
@FreakkForLife
@Hiraeth
@balding exprettyboy
@predeterminism
@thompsonz
@FailedNormieManlet
@the BULL
@Vermilioncore
@Xangsane
@Lihito
@Growth Plate
@rupert Pupkin
@8pslcel
@printerandfaxmachin
@alriodai
@RecessedChinCel
@nameless_sunflower
@gamma
@smvmaxxertilllate
@TeenAscender
@robobafett999
@StuffedFrog
@rand anon
@Spike the dragon
@OnlyWs
@vaninskybird
@St.TikTokcel
@elegant567
@Guerrilla
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