MY BRUTAL IRONY (How i ascended in looks but descended in inhibitions)

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Deleted member 17531

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When i was younger, around middle school age, i was an ugly ass little nigga. Bald fade cut, undeveloped round face, noticeable acne, it was pretty bad. Not to mention i had no awareness of hygiene, so i always smelled hella musty because i was always playing basketball and getting sweaty. But i was also very low inhib during this time. Always talking to people, funniest nigga at my school, etc etc. I also was so low inhib that i chased a family member around with a loaded gun on several occasions, shot a BB gun at police in broad daylight, and pulled a knife out in the middle of math class once because my teacher was bothering me.

Fast forward to 2022. Greatly improved looks, not chad or anything but people irl think i'm gl and i get positive reinforcement. Great hygiene too, improved tremendously in that. But guess what? I'm high inhib as fuck. At one point it was so bad that i could have a sweating cortisol attack just walking to class. Its improved a little bit lately but its still bad, and im definitely still too high inhib to approach girls who give me iois. I once hopped a fence to avoid talking to a girl that was obsessed with me :lul:. I was much happier as a ugly ass hypersocial little nigga than now as a decent looking high inhib nigga.
 
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ironic.
 
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Not even a photon
 
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When i was younger, around middle school age, i was an ugly ass little nigga. Bald fade cut, undeveloped round face, noticeable acne, it was pretty bad. Not to mention i had no awareness of hygiene, so i always smelled hella musty because i was always playing basketball and getting sweaty. But i was also very low inhib during this time. Always talking to people, funniest nigga at my school, etc etc. I also was so low inhib that i chased a family member around with a loaded gun on several occasions, shot a BB gun at police in broad daylight, and pulled a knife out in the middle of math class once because my teacher was bothering me.

Fast forward to 2022. Greatly improved looks, not chad or anything but people irl think i'm gl and i get positive reinforcement. Great hygiene too, improved tremendously in that. But guess what? I'm high inhib as fuck. At one point it was so bad that i could have a sweating cortisol attack just walking to class. Its improved a little bit lately but its still bad, and im definitely still too high inhib to approach girls who give me iois. I once hopped a fence to avoid talking to a girl that was obsessed with me :lul:. I was much happier as a ugly ass hypersocial little nigga than now as a decent looking high inhib nigga.
You just got too much trauma bro. Trauma build up makes you more inhib. I on the other hand was prettier when I was younger but less inhib now, cause I sorted out most of the trauma.
 
You just got too much trauma bro. Trauma build up makes you more inhib. I on the other hand was prettier when I was younger but less inhib now, cause I sorted out most of the trauma.
trauma from what? even when i was ugly i didnt get negative reactions, in fact i had my longest relationship when i was ugly
 
Scarlett Johansson Oscars GIF by PBS SoCal
 
trauma from what? even when i was ugly i didnt get negative reactions, in fact i had my longest relationship when i was ugly
Bro you had a girl put miracle whip on your cock when you were 10
 
Bro you had a girl put miracle whip on your cock when you were 10
12 and yea i know because i was low inhib enough to tell her to do it
 
can relate in some way tbh, do you aswell feel some kind of pressure to behave certain way that should be congruent to how you look? I'm constantly overthinking everything
 
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can relate in some way tbh, do you aswell feel some kind of pressure to behave certain way that should be congruent to how you look? I'm constantly overthinking everything
yes, because im part black people expect me to act like a black person would (thug)
i do have "thug" traits personality wise but i dont generally act like some aped out hood nigga, and i think this confuses people
 
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When i was younger, around middle school age, i was an ugly ass little nigga. Bald fade cut, undeveloped round face, noticeable acne, it was pretty bad. Not to mention i had no awareness of hygiene, so i always smelled hella musty because i was always playing basketball and getting sweaty. But i was also very low inhib during this time. Always talking to people, funniest nigga at my school, etc etc. I also was so low inhib that i chased a family member around with a loaded gun on several occasions, shot a BB gun at police in broad daylight, and pulled a knife out in the middle of math class once because my teacher was bothering me.

Fast forward to 2022. Greatly improved looks, not chad or anything but people irl think i'm gl and i get positive reinforcement. Great hygiene too, improved tremendously in that. But guess what? I'm high inhib as fuck. At one point it was so bad that i could have a sweating cortisol attack just walking to class. Its improved a little bit lately but its still bad, and im definitely still too high inhib to approach girls who give me iois. I once hopped a fence to avoid talking to a girl that was obsessed with me :lul:. I was much happier as a ugly ass hypersocial little nigga than now as a decent looking high inhib nigga.
i think im a black guy cuz you described me
 
I increase 3 psl but I spend last 3 years in my room. Only go outside to compare my height to others
 

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