my first compliment from a girl (TW)

[etulceil]

ive remembered this dreadful memory some time ago and ive wanted to share it with someone yet i could also never disclose it to someone ik for its too intimate it stands too close to my soul
it was just after my first suicide attempt where i failed after just slitting my wrist i bandaged it cuz i didnt go deep enough and the blood just kept flowing but i lost a considerable amount so much that a puddle formed beneath me cuz i chikened out so in my defeat i went to school the next day and while being my usual ND self with my classmates a girl(also from my class) said i looked whiter and that ive gotten better looking
i think this ruined my perception of love and myself it stands at the very core of my existence

 

[etulceil]

b

 

[looksovernt]

Just lose half your blood to get 0.01% of the attention chad gets bro

 

[Deleted member 89064]

ive remembered this dreadful memory some time ago and ive wanted to share it with someone yet i could also never disclose it to someone ik for its too intimate it stands too close to my soul
it was just after my first suicide attempt where i failed after just slitting my wrist i bandaged it cuz i didnt go deep enough and the blood just kept flowing but i lost a considerable amount so much that a puddle formed beneath me cuz i chikened out so in my defeat i went to school the next day and while being my usual ND self with my classmates a girl(also from my class) said i looked whiter and that ive gotten better looking
i think this ruined my perception of love and myself it stands at the very core of my existence

That's actually ropefuel

 

[EvilSatanArseRapist]

Fuck bro
Sry man.

 

[etulceil]

That's actually ropefuel

lol it is

Just lose half your blood to get 0.01% of the attention chad gets bro

the things us truecels have to go through..

 

[etulceil]

Fuck bro
Sry man.

no problem im sure u suffered enough yourself so i hope u find peace

 

[EvilSatanArseRapist]

so i hope u find peace

It will take a while i think.

Have you seen any of my threads or something or why are you saying this?

Also: why'd you rope?

Try to tell someone irl abt it eventually.
My uncle told me some secrets and got some stuff off of his chest he hasn't told anyone in years.
He profusely thanked me after.
I think it might be good.
Dw tho, give it time.

 

[etulceil]

It will take a while i think.

Have you seen any of my threads or something or why are you saying this?

Also: why'd you rope?

Try to tell someone irl abt it eventually.
My uncle told me some secrets and got some stuff off of his chest he hasn't told anyone in years.
He profusely thanked me after.
I think it might be good.
Dw tho, give it time.

there are stuff u can never share u know? even if you did theyll never understand
how can ppl understand that my struggle with faith tears me apart in a way that crushes me?
how can ppl understand that my very existence makes me detest being? i dont like anything about myself and never will
as to why ill end it(im not planning to but if i did) its just my self hate the abuse from my parents and my struggles with my self image all made me into a very detestable person which greatly restricted my ability to form relationships so its just very lonely not fitting in anywhere

 

[EvilSatanArseRapist]

there are stuff u can never share u know? even if you did theyll never understand
how can ppl understand that my struggle with faith tears me apart in a way that crushes me?
how can ppl understand that my very existence makes me detest being? i dont like anything about myself and never will
as to why ill end it(im not planning to but if i did) its just my self hate the abuse from my parents and my struggles with my self image all made me into a very detestable person which greatly restricted my ability to form relationships so its just very lonely not fitting in anywhere

I feel you.
Our circumstances are likely very different.
But it kinda went away.
In parts atleast.

 

[etulceil]

I feel you.
Our circumstances are likely very different.
But it kinda went away.
In parts atleast.

Mind sharing your story?

 

[EvilSatanArseRapist]

Mind sharing your story?

I don't really one event in particular like you do.
What i meant was, i relate in a way.
I have been told by fucking normies "it's not that deep".
To me it fucking is.
Like not sharing stuff at times cuz you know they won't get you?

 

[RickyFitts]

ropefuel

 

[lightmerchant]

there are stuff u can never share u know? even if you did theyll never understand
how can ppl understand that my struggle with faith tears me apart in a way that crushes me?
how can ppl understand that my very existence makes me detest being? i dont like anything about myself and never will
as to why ill end it(im not planning to but if i did) its just my self hate the abuse from my parents and my struggles with my self image all made me into a very detestable person which greatly restricted my ability to form relationships so its just very lonely not fitting in anywhere

Honestly this forum is ALWAYS a fkn nightmare. The community on this forum doesn’t make it any better. How good or bad you may look or feel this community is only gonna make u feel worse. Get out in nature and live life to your fullest, aint nobody gonna get happy from reading these threads and ldar:ing all fkn day.

 

[etulceil]

I don't really one event in particular like you do.
What i meant was, i relate in a way.
I have been told by fucking normies "it's not that deep".
To me it fucking is.
Like not sharing stuff at times cuz you know they won't get you?

Yes no one gets us it's like a barrier erected

 

[etulceil]

Lol

Honestly this forum is ALWAYS a fkn nightmare. The community on this forum doesn’t make it any better. How good or bad you may look or feel this community is only gonna make u feel worse. Get out in nature and live life to your fullest, aint nobody gonna get happy from reading these threads and ldar:ing all fkn day.

 

[T50CeI]

JBW pill

 

[etulceil]

JBW pill

I mog u sissy boy
Lock in

 

[T50CeI]

I mog u sissy boy
Lock in