ShowerMaxxing
Kraken
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2021
- Posts
- 18,210
- Reputation
- 24,552
am a 5"4 ethnic basement dweller. I was bullied throughout elementary, middle, and high school. I was the last pick, I never had any friends, never had a girlfriend, and I was an underachiever.
I thought there was something wrong with me. I started questioning myself thinking that maybe it was attitude, or perhaps maybe it was the way the interacted with people that pushed people away, maybe I didn't work hard enough. I pushed myself into academics and with a stroke of a combination of hard work and luck, I manage to enter into a prestigious university.
My social life, if I ever had one, did not improve. I tried conforming to society standards by conditioning myself to show people respect and kindness expecting that people will treat me as an equal and as someone as whom they would consider as a friend. My efforts were largely ignored and at best I became a mere acquaintance; meaning that after class, work, or a group project I became invisible. Girls never paid attention to me. I have come to the point that I envy ugly men. At least when girls look at them, they would shriek and their face will twist in disgust when looking at them. I, however, do not even exist. I wasn't even a fly worth swatting. Last summer, I started sinking deeper and deeper into my depression as university continued.
Last summer, I took on a two month research internship in Czech Republic thinking that my life would change. It didn't. My supervisor and my colleagues hated me. I never made any friends and lost my virginity. Worse, everyday, I was made to bare witness of the college lifestyle that I envied. Everyday I see a close group of friends, Caucasian, going out to parties, traveling, drinking, drugging and clubbing. At night, people are having amazing intense rough sex with sounds so loud that it is transmitted through the wall and into my dorm room.
Slavic women, Czech women in particular were out of this world....8+/10 HBBs sluthate/misc standards face and body wise walking around everywhere. I am not talking about just 2 in every 10 girls...I am talking about at least 5-7 girls out of 10 that I see that are simply beautiful. The men facemogs and heightmogs the fuck out of me. Czech men are 5"11+ minimum and most of them have 7+/10 facial aesthetics and athletic physiques. It was maddening. All this was happening, while I was doing lab work on a shit topic that no one gives fuck all and STEMceling and studycel while people are having fun, sex and party. Alas, I finally came home.
While finishing my research paper, during the recesses of my mind, exploring deep interweb, I came across this called Sluthate. I read about the lookism, heightism, LMS, hypergamy, juggernaut theory, maxilla, gonial angles......and it all became clear. I don't know why it wasn't made obvious. The only reason people treated me such distaste and disrespect is because I am short, ugly, and ethnic. Plain and simple. People disrespect me and do not value my opinion because I look more child than man. I am a pain to look at and god awful ugly. I may have the same skill or maybe more qualified as 6"+ Caucasian Chad dom FWHR 2.0 slayer, but people would not hire me or consider me because I am physically repulsive. Everytime I try raising my voice, I am ignored and I am automatically labeled as someone with a complex. People have bullied me and called me ugly and repulsive routinely throughout the years to the point that I can't even look at myself in the mirror. I don't even use facebook because I am too ugly to post photos of my self.
I am at my breaking point and quit school earlier last year, just one year shy of finishing. My marks were plummeting and my life is falling apart. I became a NEET. I have been in social isolation for the past 10+ months and it is nothing but agony. You know how to punish a criminal? You punish him by putting into solitary confinement. Humans are social creatures and if they are deprived of social interaction, they will become insane. I am not a criminal. Never hurt anyone, never killed anyone, never cursed at anyone. I don't even have a weird fetish and I am not a delinquent. And yet, I am being judged and suffering from the same punishment as criminals. No, even criminals/thugs have friends and get laid. I am worse than an insect. Society has forsaken me.
Tldr:
I thought there was something wrong with me. I started questioning myself thinking that maybe it was attitude, or perhaps maybe it was the way the interacted with people that pushed people away, maybe I didn't work hard enough. I pushed myself into academics and with a stroke of a combination of hard work and luck, I manage to enter into a prestigious university.
My social life, if I ever had one, did not improve. I tried conforming to society standards by conditioning myself to show people respect and kindness expecting that people will treat me as an equal and as someone as whom they would consider as a friend. My efforts were largely ignored and at best I became a mere acquaintance; meaning that after class, work, or a group project I became invisible. Girls never paid attention to me. I have come to the point that I envy ugly men. At least when girls look at them, they would shriek and their face will twist in disgust when looking at them. I, however, do not even exist. I wasn't even a fly worth swatting. Last summer, I started sinking deeper and deeper into my depression as university continued.
Last summer, I took on a two month research internship in Czech Republic thinking that my life would change. It didn't. My supervisor and my colleagues hated me. I never made any friends and lost my virginity. Worse, everyday, I was made to bare witness of the college lifestyle that I envied. Everyday I see a close group of friends, Caucasian, going out to parties, traveling, drinking, drugging and clubbing. At night, people are having amazing intense rough sex with sounds so loud that it is transmitted through the wall and into my dorm room.
Slavic women, Czech women in particular were out of this world....8+/10 HBBs sluthate/misc standards face and body wise walking around everywhere. I am not talking about just 2 in every 10 girls...I am talking about at least 5-7 girls out of 10 that I see that are simply beautiful. The men facemogs and heightmogs the fuck out of me. Czech men are 5"11+ minimum and most of them have 7+/10 facial aesthetics and athletic physiques. It was maddening. All this was happening, while I was doing lab work on a shit topic that no one gives fuck all and STEMceling and studycel while people are having fun, sex and party. Alas, I finally came home.
While finishing my research paper, during the recesses of my mind, exploring deep interweb, I came across this called Sluthate. I read about the lookism, heightism, LMS, hypergamy, juggernaut theory, maxilla, gonial angles......and it all became clear. I don't know why it wasn't made obvious. The only reason people treated me such distaste and disrespect is because I am short, ugly, and ethnic. Plain and simple. People disrespect me and do not value my opinion because I look more child than man. I am a pain to look at and god awful ugly. I may have the same skill or maybe more qualified as 6"+ Caucasian Chad dom FWHR 2.0 slayer, but people would not hire me or consider me because I am physically repulsive. Everytime I try raising my voice, I am ignored and I am automatically labeled as someone with a complex. People have bullied me and called me ugly and repulsive routinely throughout the years to the point that I can't even look at myself in the mirror. I don't even use facebook because I am too ugly to post photos of my self.
I am at my breaking point and quit school earlier last year, just one year shy of finishing. My marks were plummeting and my life is falling apart. I became a NEET. I have been in social isolation for the past 10+ months and it is nothing but agony. You know how to punish a criminal? You punish him by putting into solitary confinement. Humans are social creatures and if they are deprived of social interaction, they will become insane. I am not a criminal. Never hurt anyone, never killed anyone, never cursed at anyone. I don't even have a weird fetish and I am not a delinquent. And yet, I am being judged and suffering from the same punishment as criminals. No, even criminals/thugs have friends and get laid. I am worse than an insect. Society has forsaken me.
Tldr:
Last edited: