Fractal Orion
Combative
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2023
- Posts
- 120
- Reputation
- 156
My mom was a psychopath
+ =+=====+= +
I don't know where to start. Probably at the time she showed 3 year old me videos of isis beheadings and gore. This woman wanted to show me why terrorists are bad without me knowing what they were. Now looking back, too, it's a bad idea she also gave me weapons, twice my size as a little kid. Yeah, she gave me things like that when I was very young. The worst part is she would try to get me all throughout my life to smoke and drink alcohol with her, didn't matter if I was 4 or 14. So my parents were divorced, and she'd get shit faced and drive me to random guys houses to fuck them while i waited or did whatever i did back then, and take me to bars and shit. Not to mention the druggy parties. My mom got so many tickets that when I played toy cars at home I gave people tickets because I thought it was normal. She also depended on me 24/7. Treating me as an adult, and making me cheer her up and shit, more on that later. She never celebrated holidays with us, and would be in her room even on birthdays. When I was young she locked me in her room, pitch black and id sit in the corner of her big bed against the wall for days. Only leaving to use the restroom but I'd have to wake that bitch up. I rarely ever saw mornings. I still remember the few times I got to leave, it was so wonderful to me. She was also extremely racist. Like, not ironically, just fucking racist. She had WW2 Nazi memorabilia, and even bought some of it too, she hung a confederate flag in my room (didnt know what it meant at the time), and when i found out i burnt it. It's a miracle I'm not racist for everything she even said. Going back to the birthdays-thing, later on in life (about 10-14) she wouldnt even celebrate my birthday, I moved at 10 to an abusive stepdads house from my grandparents at my mom's, and my mom went unhinged. She walked around naked 24/7, drank all day, all night she'd scream and argue with my stepdad, mostly she was in the wrong, and she would break shit and make ME fix it, or i couldn't go to bed. She stole my radio and blasted racist shit and just loud music all night, she would cut the fuck out of herself and then try to kill herself in the shower, and I had to pin her down and wrestle my naked mom away from literally all the scissors and knives we had, getting cut and sometimes attacked in the process. I also had to bust down her door into her room for this shit, which she made me fix later after being sworn out that i didn't let my own mom kill herself. She also told young-me the best ways to cut myself, looking back who the fuck tells their kid that? She never helped with school, obviously, too) She wasn't a real parent. She would burst into my room at night and stand there, only to leave silently, weird. She forced me to sleep outside many times because id come back from my dads and she was like "oh your tough and do karate?" type shit. So she punished me for being stronger by doing that? Mostly, I had no tent so I just laid there. Also I had to spend schoolnights counseling my mom until she could shutup and sleep so i could maybe get an hour MAX. So my grandfather died and we moved back to my grandparents. Grandma had dementia. Mom got a new bf. I spent my life savings and work on a custom gaming setup and pc and they trashed it with beer cans and let her bf do whatever on my pc and buy shit. I WAS SO GOD DAMN MAD. (this is also after my expulsion, read my other article) To even get onto virtual school I had to push this fatass bf over because he was passed out legit on the floor.. bro... He also fought me out of nowhere full force, because he found out I could fight. I mopped the floors with him, but he wanted to fight A GODDAMN KID TO PROVE HE WAS COOL TO MY MOM AND THEY WERE FINE WITH IT? YO WHAT- So my mom never went to the store for us, and she would leave for about 2 weeks at a time, sometimes more for her boyfriend. So it was me alone to take care of my grandma. And we had no food. So I had to walk upwards of 10 miles daily in snowstorms to get food. I had no coat or anything, one day i didn't eat since i only had around 15$ and my hands were freezing so i bought those shitty cloth gloves and 2 coffees to warm up my hands. Just me, a shirt, pants, and 2 bags of food to bring to my grandma and me. While my mom was partying. She took the money she was aloted for beer and my grandma had to pay out of pocket. Not like the money she was given was also my grandmas too. By this time, my 2 pets, a hermit crab and guineapig died. I got food poisoning for 4 days and when I got up I found out they ignored my hermit crab and so it died. My guineapig was like 9 so yeah- but he was like a childhood friend to me you don't understand. Never been so close to an animal in my life. They used my hermit crab's shell as a decoration on a fake lighthouse without telling me, then my mom was holding my dead guineapigs body up by the hands and making it dance on her bed tryna get me to join in. When I had a breakdown in my room she tried to rip me out of my bed and she kept saying things about it. How the fuck do you treat me that way? This isn't even all she's done. My extreme PTSD prevents me from remembering it all at once. I now have severe depression, a speech impediment, BAD PTSD, and dissociative disorder because of this. The whole disorder makes me forget where and why I'm at, cease emotion and feeling, talk very different, and care about no one at all, it's like every living being sulks to the same level of treatment (besides animals). My bestfriend/only real love, died at this time because of suicide. I still think of her everyday, all I can say was she was my only thing keeping me from running away totally. Mom totally ruined it even more by never letting me forget she did. THANKS ALOT. The one girl, and person I could say anything to and they committed suicide. It's worse than people in my family dying honestly. But still, mom made fun of it. My uncle was an abuser too. He knew about this. Also my entire mom's side tried alienating me from my dad's. They told me horrible stories of what "he" did. My uncle later told me it was all actually my mom. DUDE WTF? So later I spoke to CPS, they did nothin, then one day my mom finds out that i said stuff i shouldn't of in a court battle and she went haywire. She rioted the entire house, threw weapons, (did i mention she throws forks and butterknives at me sometimes in general?) but i mean real daggers and shit, and i left and came back. She tried to stab me. I grabbed my survival pack and booked it to the woods behind my house. Later the cops came, alot happened I don't wanna talk about, and eventually she ended up talking to me in a total blank expression like I wasn't even human. Now that, scared me. She disowned me on the spot, which hurt for a minute but we were never the same. I spent the entire rest of the night with a buckler shield and a sword standing in my grandmas room. Waiting for day so I could legally leave according to the cops that came. She actually halfway came in the room 2 or 3 times but she saw me and closed the door silently. I cannot tell you all the nights I've stayed awake guarding myself from being either beat up, or scared for my life. I've had to fight off my mom a few times too. This is a shortened version.+ =+=====+= +
Other punishments in general were tying me to a hot to the touch heater thing downstairs that burnt me all night, making me eat expired and moldy fruit/food, starving, pushing me out of cars to walk home over sometimes things she did not me, and much more. I still can't remember all the details I just know I'd rather be a rape victim than any of this at this point. I never was allowed to do sports and I've never gone to a friends house/hungout in my life. I was isolated. I grew up separate. I can't communicate to regular kids now. I can't relate.
So can you tell me, what's wrong with her? What kind of a person functions like this?
