Oh my fucking god, its actually fucking over

iblamemandible7

iblamemandible7

ORG RUINER
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Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I wish I could make sense of my life and take away some moral or meaning more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

How many dice would I have to roll, and how many would have to land on 6, for me to be born with all of this instead of starting on equal ground?

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of people will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of the modern human privilege a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try, I just do these things to myself and sabotage myself on purpose from the future I want over and over and over again because Its the only thing that im used to. Dnr
 
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Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I really want to make sense of my life more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of the public will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try. Dnr
The poster feels completely hopeless and crushed by self-hate after seeing a candid photo that shattered their illusions about how they look. They describe a long list of physical flaws they believe make them "subhuman," including facial deformities, short height, bad eyesight, and early balding. On top of that, they mention mental health issues and severe social anxiety. They believe people judge others mainly by looks, and they feel they’ve lost at life before it even started. They've been using substances to cope since they were 14 and don’t see a future for themselves.
 
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The poster feels completely hopeless and crushed by self-hate after seeing a candid photo that shattered their illusions about how they look. They describe a long list of physical flaws they believe make them "subhuman," including facial deformities, short height, bad eyesight, and early balding. On top of that, they mention mental health issues and severe social anxiety. They believe people judge others mainly by looks, and they feel they’ve lost at life before it even started. They've been using substances to cope since they were 14 and don’t see a future for themselves.
Brutal
 
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You should leave the org before you genuinely lose your mind dude im being genuine rn
 
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Too late to read all this somebody smush into bite sized
 
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You should leave the org before you genuinely lose your mind dude im being genuine rn
I have nothing else bro, genuinely, now that I understand the truth I cant look away. Imagine if I told you, "don't think about cars". What is the first thing youll think of? Thats how my life feels every day whenever someone gives me the look that only subhumans truly understand, or talk behind my back, or judge me. If I wasnt a genetic loser at life, I wouldnt have been molded into this useless thing I am today, with no desires and no drive.
 
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I have nothing else bro, genuinely, now that I understand the truth I cant look away. Imagine if I told you, "don't think about cars". What is the first thing youll think of? Thats how my life feels every day whenever someone gives me the look that only subhumans truly understand, or talk behind my back, or judge me.
Well honestly instead of venting and being genuinely sorry for yourself you can do everything it takes to become better, like i literally mean follow every botb guide or just do what pneumo did, semi-hardmaxx by using everything he had in hand. Or honestly start slaving for money and save up for surgery
 
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Well honestly instead of venting and being genuinely sorry for yourself you can do everything it takes to become better, like i literally mean follow every botb guide or just do what pneumo did, semi-hardmaxx by using everything he had in hand. Or honestly start slaving for money and save up for surgery
I have this problem, I work completely against the things I want in life, and its on purpose for some reason. I dont know why, its muscle memory. Yes, I do want to slave to hardmax, if I started now I could maybe have a decent life by my mid 20s. But theres so many mental hurdles and so little energy. I dont expect advice from you ig, I just want to organize my thoughts (which clearly its not working that well) to try and understand some things
 
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Idk bro I just went to my college orientation and everyone there was pretty subhuman I think your fine lmao
 
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Did u try raw liver?
 
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Just get bimax and implants dawg lmao
 
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I have this problem, I work completely against the things I want in life, and its on purpose for some reason. I dont know why, its muscle memory. Yes, I do want to slave to hardmax, if I started now I could maybe have a decent life by my mid 20s. But theres so many mental hurdles and so little energy. I dont expect advice from you ig, I just want to organize my thoughts (which clearly its not working that well) to try and understand some things
oh yea bro genuinely leave the org like I'm saying this with all the honesty I got bro cuz idk if you're baiting but if you're not then you genuinely need to move on for some time and even if you cant forget about the blackpill, just leave the org for at least a few months cuz you def got severely blackpilled to the point where you think its over for you
 
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oh yea bro genuinely leave the org like I'm saying this with all the honesty I got bro cuz idk if you're baiting but if you're not then you genuinely need to move on for some time and even if you cant forget about the blackpill, just leave the org for at least a few months cuz you def got severely blackpilled to the point where you think its over for you
Ive been blackpilled before any of you tbh, I knew about all of ts deep down since I was a child, I experienced it at all starting at 5 years old. Trust me, all of it. Then when I "discovered" the bp it was just like hearing an explanation for why my life is the way it is. It makes perfect sense now
 
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Ive been blackpilled before any of you tbh, I knew about all of ts deep down since I was a child, I experienced it at all starting at 5 years old. Trust me, all of it. Then when I "discovered" the bp it was just like hearing an explanation for why my life is the way it is. It makes perfect sense now
and thats why i think you genuinely need to log off bro , try NTmaxxing to the best of your ability dawg
 
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Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I wish I could make sense of my life and take away some moral or meaning more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of people will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of the modern human privilege a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try, I just do these things to myself and sabotage myself on purpose from the future I want over and over and over again because Its the only thing that im used to. Dnr
Mog Israel
1749962066564

Mog Israel
 
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and thats why i think you genuinely need to log off bro , try NTmaxxing to the best of your ability dawg
I tried ntmaxxing in hs, it didnt work, the only time it worked at all was when I found a supplement that let me live for the first time ever, but it was slowly killing me. When I stopped it, so did my life. Hope that makes sense
 
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and thats why i think you genuinely need to log off bro , try NTmaxxing to the best of your ability dawg
And now I know its useless, ntmaxxing is only for my own internal comfort, on the outside its all the same
 
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whats ur body fat
 
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I tried ntmaxxing in hs, it didnt work, the only time it worked at all was when I found a supplement that let me live for the first time ever, but it was slowly killing me. When I stopped it, so did my life. Hope that makes sense
Tren? Wtf you talking about

Leak the limitless pill now Mr. Mog Israel
 
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u are in india bro im sure you'll be fine vs your competition
 
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Tren? Wtf you talking about

Leak the limitless pill now Mr. Mog Israel
Im not saying it here jfl but its horrible for your health


and ive never roided before
 
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Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I wish I could make sense of my life and take away some moral or meaning more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

How many dice would I have to roll, and how many would have to land on 6, for me to be born with all of this instead of starting on equal ground?

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of people will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of the modern human privilege a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try, I just do these things to myself and sabotage myself on purpose from the future I want over and over and over again because Its the only thing that im used to. Dnr

Maxresdefault 1



On the real dm face I will be legit and I am trusted OG

I will be 100% honest
 
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The poster feels completely hopeless and crushed by self-hate after seeing a candid photo that shattered their illusions about how they look. They describe a long list of physical flaws they believe make them "subhuman," including facial deformities, short height, bad eyesight, and early balding. On top of that, they mention mental health issues and severe social anxiety. They believe people judge others mainly by looks, and they feel they’ve lost at life before it even started. They've been using substances to cope since they were 14 and don’t see a future for themselves.
damn i feel you bro. best course of action is to get off the website before you ropemaxx
nigga org is life jfl
nigger you literally joined today
 
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damn i feel you bro. best course of action is to get off the website before you ropemaxx

nigger you literally joined today
i knew org years ago, i just decided that today was the day jfl faggot
 
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subhuman gang
 
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Just get bimax and implants dawg lmao
Thats the plan, I need trimax + supra implants + infra implants + anterior zygos + supra fat grafting, im ultra high inhib tho so Ill probably pussy out and keep coping
 
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Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I wish I could make sense of my life and take away some moral or meaning more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

How many dice would I have to roll, and how many would have to land on 6, for me to be born with all of this instead of starting on equal ground?

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of people will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of the modern human privilege a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try, I just do these things to myself and sabotage myself on purpose from the future I want over and over and over again because Its the only thing that im used to. Dnr
Post the candid it’s prop not that bad
 
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The poster feels completely hopeless and crushed by self-hate after seeing a candid photo that shattered their illusions about how they look. They describe a long list of physical flaws they believe make them "subhuman," including facial deformities, short height, bad eyesight, and early balding. On top of that, they mention mental health issues and severe social anxiety. They believe people judge others mainly by looks, and they feel they’ve lost at life before it even started. They've been using substances to cope since they were 14 and don’t see a future for themselves.
lfmaoo nigger
 
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Brutal man but you write decently
 
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U're a curry i presume?
 
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Man that's genuinely tough:f:
Go moneymaxx, become billionaire, and just stop caring about looks.
No point on crying about something you can't change. Vent, accept, move on
 
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Honestly I'm so biased against myself that's why I keep asking for people to rate me


If I compare a Pic right now to something I took 4 months ago the difference is so astronomical that it's ridiculous I ever went out looking like that, and before that I was even fatter


Like holy shit, I feel like as though I was blind for so long, like how could I look in the mirror and not see what was wrong
 
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Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I wish I could make sense of my life and take away some moral or meaning more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

How many dice would I have to roll, and how many would have to land on 6, for me to be born with all of this instead of starting on equal ground?

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of people will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of the modern human privilege a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try, I just do these things to myself and sabotage myself on purpose from the future I want over and over and over again because Its the only thing that im used to. Dnr
brutal and over thread:feelswhy::feelswhy:. I also DNR
 
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Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I wish I could make sense of my life and take away some moral or meaning more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

How many dice would I have to roll, and how many would have to land on 6, for me to be born with all of this instead of starting on equal ground?

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of people will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of the modern human privilege a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try, I just do these things to myself and sabotage myself on purpose from the future I want over and over and over again because Its the only thing that im used to. Dnr
My life is similar to yours :feelswhy:
 
  • So Sad
Reactions: iblamemandible7
Before everyone spams dnr let me tell you, i really dgaf, this is for myself not for you, im writing this in the hopes that maybe I can pick up 1 of the 1,000 broken pieces of glass that my life has become after putting these experiences into words, I wish I could make sense of my life and take away some moral or meaning more than anything.

I just took a candid of myself and realized deep down Ive been deluding myself for all these months. And I dont even know if it was on purpose or not. Ive played a trick on my own mind, using the best angles and jutting to convince myself im an mtn. But the candids dont lie. Guys, I can officially say I am a subhuman. And I really always have been. I am not one of you, I seriously doubt any of you guys reading this are in as bad a position as I am.

My upper eyelids take up as much space as my eyes themselves, I have syndrome-tier infraorbitals (more like lack thereof). An extremely recessed mandible with a weak chin, and even a recessed, flat maxilla. My big nose is taller than the entirety of my lower third. Basically everything below my forehead is an absolutely fucked, mangled mess of flesh in the wrong places and lack of anything in the right places. Actually, my forehead is too wide, and I am a norwood 2 at the age of 17 too. I also failed to reach the heights of my parents, so as far as my body goes Im a manlet with hips wider than my narrow clavicles. You would think God would pity me to at least give me the blue eyes that some of my relatives have, but he gave me T50 eyes instead. Speaking of eyes, my vision is twice the limit of legally blind, and I was born with disability of my eye muscles. Im also severely ND, or have extreme social/general anxiety, cant tell which, but whatever my mental state is, it has held me back almost as much as my physical being. I don't know if I was just born fucked up in the head, or if it gradually came on over the course of my childhood through being negatively reaffirmed about myself daily through my interactions. Probably a combination.

How many dice would I have to roll, and how many would have to land on 6, for me to be born with all of this instead of starting on equal ground?

Animals are so shallow, people are so shallow, there is no human being on this planet who can escape that. Even the most charitable, moral human will still make subconscious judgements based on your appearance. They will put you in your place on the ladder based on their lived experiences, even if they don't make you aware of that, it's an innate judgement that stays with them in their mind. It's not even a bad thing, it's just how we operate. Why do we kill flies, but spare butterflies? Why do we kill rats, but feed wild squirrels? Why do we eat pork, but could never imagine eating dog? This is just how nature works, is so obvious, yet the majority of people will deny this. We are addicted to proving to others that we are the exception, the saviors, the good in this world.

I dont really know where im going with this tbh, its just a collection of thoughts that come over me when I reflect on my subhumanity. I lost the game of life in its most primal form. I see no path ahead for myself. Ive coped with "supplements" to soothe my mind and anesthetize myself since 14, maybe thats what lies in store for me. I was squandered of the modern human privilege a good life having myself before I was even born. It was over before it began. I dont know why I even try, I just do these things to myself and sabotage myself on purpose from the future I want over and over and over again because Its the only thing that im used to. Dnr
I’ve seen your pics and I genuinely believe your Mtn your being way too hard on yourself if your getting surgery my best advice is to log off this forum for a while and start saving like I am. being on this forum for a long period of time is bound to fuck your mental health up
 
  • Hmm...
Reactions: iblamemandible7
I have this problem, I work completely against the things I want in life, and its on purpose for some reason. I dont know why, its muscle memory. Yes, I do want to slave to hardmax, if I started now I could maybe have a decent life by my mid 20s. But theres so many mental hurdles and so little energy. I dont expect advice from you ig, I just want to organize my thoughts (which clearly its not working that well) to try and understand some things
I have terrible anxiety like very bad and I still wage slave to save money honestly it’s easier said than done and I won’t lie it’s hard for me also but what I do that makes me feel slightly better is just view everyone else as NPCs and think of this world as your ouster if you want to succeed in life you have to be somewhat delusional anyways
 
  • Love it
Reactions: iblamemandible7

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