Over

[newuser:]

Idk how to start this thread but, I’m going into grade 10 this upcoming school year, I’m ugly, and I know I am, nose is my biggest flaw. Skin has been purging like crazy while on tretinoin, school is September 8th. I am crazy insecure about my acne and side profile, last year in school I tried to hide my face in my hoodie everyday with everyone starring at me, making me so uncomfortable. Pretty bad at talking to people, when someone comes up to me, I stress about if the words are going to come out of my mouth correctly, i stutter when someone I don’t know talks to me. I have this one friend who got rated lhtn on org. Basically best friends, he walks in the hallways everyday with me, making me look even more weird, girls come up to him constantly, and he carries our school in the athletic aspect. I have had a few girls like me, one girl friend, idk why, legitimately waste of time, and annoying too. Grade 9, this one girl caught my eye, lltb, she was different from the others, no make up, blocks every boy, non talkative, doesn’t wear the disgusting short shorts and crop tops that this generation of girls popularized. we had art and math together in first semester, we exchanged glances a few times, got sat together, but this guy in front of us constantly keep looking back at her, and even if I did start a conversation he would have jumped in, got on my nerves. After semester one ended, in semester two, the girl who I liked you could say, let’s call her Maria, Maria’s friend was in my science class, and Maria’s friend knew I liked Maria, she tried to set me up, I said no. This guy who sat beside me in my cooking class, was dating Maria’s friend, I was asking him to ask Maria’s friend for Maria’s snap, blah blah, I wanted to talk to Maria, as friends, I didn’t want to date her, but I believe I ruined the chances of that. After that, later in semester 2, I saw Maria in the halls, she sometimes held eye contact, other times she just looked straight down. Now I pray Maria isn’t in any of my classes this upcoming school year. Never would of thought I would be writing a whole paragraph. Anyways, grade 10 is my experiment year, hopefully it all gets better in grade 11. Peace