Aladin
Kraken
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2022
- Posts
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Long ago there was a potatoe with 18 arms but only 2 legs. It was so sad. All its brothers and sisters in the earth around it had so many arms and legs. And they laughed and mocked that potatoe.
Harvest time came and the farmer started ripping the potatoes from the ground. And out they came, screaming for help. But the sad potatoe stayed in the ground.
It stayed there for many harvests, sinking deeper and deeper into the soil. One day, it felt something, like cold musky air on its legs. What was this?
Soon after the ground gave in and it fell into a cavity beneath.
The fall hurt our cute little potatoe, and it groaned and moaned in the darkness.
Shadows surrounded it. Then a light appearched. It was a mighty old potatoe with a long beard.
Welcome Pipkin, it said, glad to see you made it.
We ve been watching you for a long thyme…
They helped him up. “Pipkin?”
yes that is your name my child ho ho.
They patted him on the back. Pipkin was scared and but overcome with wonder. Nobody had ever been this nice to him.
He was so confused that he didn’t hear the distant screams or smelled the faint scent of french fries that permeated everything here.
They lead him into a big chamber and told him to wait and left.
It was round and the ceiling was invisible in the lightless void.
Then lights erupted, cheers. It was an areana!
What was going on! Pipkin felt naked and afraid.
The crowd shouted! Skin him skin him, peel him, boil boil boil
He could see the ceiling now. A hatch opened and the old potatoe was lowered down on ropes. He wore a big hat and a cloak. In his hands he held a strange wrapped bundle, bigger than himself by far. The crowd fell silent. He landed before pipkin and dramtically unwrapped the object.
It was a potatoe peeler!
He sneered at Pipkin and came closer.
Our tiny potaote wasnt having it though. He felt something inside himself. He may have been a raw little potatoe on the outside, but the long years in the earth had made his insides hard boiled.
He grabbed the peeler from the old geezer and skinned him alive. The crowed ohd and ahd and screamed.
YYYYYARRRRH
pipkin screamed and the old potatoe screamed too and shook violenty on the floor in spasms of agony.
Pipkin picked up the potatoes skin and put it on. Then he raised the peeler, glistening with fresh, slimey potatoe juice.
And this is how I, pipkin, first of my name, came to rule the underworld of the potatoe patch. But I have grown old and weary. My young sprouts, you must hearken unto my words. The world of man is ripe for the taking. We shall peel them, boil them,…
He collapsed in his throne, breathless. He dismissed his children with a wave of his hand while a hot potatoe slut brought him a drink.
His hand caressed his royal robe, the skin, he recalled that day. It seemed so long ago now, that day… he began dreaming of the future kingdom.
Harvest time came and the farmer started ripping the potatoes from the ground. And out they came, screaming for help. But the sad potatoe stayed in the ground.
It stayed there for many harvests, sinking deeper and deeper into the soil. One day, it felt something, like cold musky air on its legs. What was this?
Soon after the ground gave in and it fell into a cavity beneath.
The fall hurt our cute little potatoe, and it groaned and moaned in the darkness.
Shadows surrounded it. Then a light appearched. It was a mighty old potatoe with a long beard.
Welcome Pipkin, it said, glad to see you made it.
We ve been watching you for a long thyme…
They helped him up. “Pipkin?”
yes that is your name my child ho ho.
They patted him on the back. Pipkin was scared and but overcome with wonder. Nobody had ever been this nice to him.
He was so confused that he didn’t hear the distant screams or smelled the faint scent of french fries that permeated everything here.
They lead him into a big chamber and told him to wait and left.
It was round and the ceiling was invisible in the lightless void.
Then lights erupted, cheers. It was an areana!
What was going on! Pipkin felt naked and afraid.
The crowd shouted! Skin him skin him, peel him, boil boil boil
He could see the ceiling now. A hatch opened and the old potatoe was lowered down on ropes. He wore a big hat and a cloak. In his hands he held a strange wrapped bundle, bigger than himself by far. The crowd fell silent. He landed before pipkin and dramtically unwrapped the object.
It was a potatoe peeler!
He sneered at Pipkin and came closer.
Our tiny potaote wasnt having it though. He felt something inside himself. He may have been a raw little potatoe on the outside, but the long years in the earth had made his insides hard boiled.
He grabbed the peeler from the old geezer and skinned him alive. The crowed ohd and ahd and screamed.
YYYYYARRRRH
pipkin screamed and the old potatoe screamed too and shook violenty on the floor in spasms of agony.
Pipkin picked up the potatoes skin and put it on. Then he raised the peeler, glistening with fresh, slimey potatoe juice.
And this is how I, pipkin, first of my name, came to rule the underworld of the potatoe patch. But I have grown old and weary. My young sprouts, you must hearken unto my words. The world of man is ripe for the taking. We shall peel them, boil them,…
He collapsed in his throne, breathless. He dismissed his children with a wave of his hand while a hot potatoe slut brought him a drink.
His hand caressed his royal robe, the skin, he recalled that day. It seemed so long ago now, that day… he began dreaming of the future kingdom.