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jeremyy

jeremyy

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  • Hmm...
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  • So Sad
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JFL at the entire forum trying to figure out what happened to Tertaf :lul::lul::lul:. the rumors are true, after years of overthinking jaw angles and coping with standard bipedal existence, tertaf has officially abandoned humanity. He didnt just ascend; he completely cross classed into a literal, hooved, cud chewing caprine cuck:sick::sick:.

Here is the breakdown of the tertaf goat phenomenon.

Step 1: Anatomy of tertaf the Goat

To understand how the nigga tertaf operates in his new form, we have to look at the stats. Lets be honest about what a Tertaftier goat looks like in the pasture:sick::

  1. The Horizontal Slit Eyes: instead of processing the brutal reality of the forum, tertaf’s eyes evolved 350 degree rectangular pupils so he can spot anyone trying to sneak up on his territory from behind.
  2. The Horn Deficit: naturally, even as an animal, tertaf couldn't roll top tier genetics because he is a fucking loser. While dominant rams get massive, sweeping, majestic horns, tertaf is stuck with awkward, asymmetric little nubbins that constantly get stuck in wire fences @
    tertaf
    @tertaf .
  3. The Posture: Even on four legs, yertaf somehow managed to maintain a severe slouch. He walks around the petting zoo looking like a wet mattress that someone threw a fleece over.
Phase 2: a day in the life of tertaf the Goat

How does Tertaf spend his time now that he’s traded his keyboard for a patch of weeds? A standard daily routine looks roughly like this:

TimeActivityThe Reality
05:00 AMStanding on top of a rusty tractor.tertaf climbs the highest point in the enclosure just to stare blankly into the middle distance, pretending he's overlooking his domain, when he's actually just lost.
12:00 PMGrazing protocol.Eating old aluminum cans, discarded cardboard, and lawn clippings because human grocery store prices were too brutal for his budget.
04:30 PMScreaming at the wind.Letting out a blood curdling human sounding shriek that terrifies the normal goats and confuses the local farmers.
09:00 PMHeadbutting a wooden post.Trying to assert dominance over an inanimate object and knocking himself out cold for the third time this week.

Phase 3: Lessons learned from tertafs mistakes

JFL at anyone who thought tertaf was going to make it. He tried to max his stats and ended up locked in a petting zoo outside of toledo, chewing on visitors jacket zippers for attention.

Take notes, boys: Dont ascend to a true goat or you will end up like this faggot, and he will reaact :sick::sick::sick::sick::sick::sick: to this guide
 
  • +1
  • Hmm...
Reactions: Lexapro and Klassek
but i don’t wannaaa
 
  • +1
Reactions: Iamspace and Lexapro
JFL at the entire forum trying to figure out what happened to Tertaf :lul::lul::lul:. the rumors are true, after years of overthinking jaw angles and coping with standard bipedal existence, tertaf has officially abandoned humanity. He didnt just ascend; he completely cross classed into a literal, hooved, cud chewing caprine cuck:sick::sick:.

Here is the breakdown of the tertaf goat phenomenon.

Step 1: Anatomy of tertaf the Goat

To understand how the nigga tertaf operates in his new form, we have to look at the stats. Lets be honest about what a Tertaftier goat looks like in the pasture:sick::

  1. The Horizontal Slit Eyes: instead of processing the brutal reality of the forum, tertaf’s eyes evolved 350 degree rectangular pupils so he can spot anyone trying to sneak up on his territory from behind.
  2. The Horn Deficit: naturally, even as an animal, tertaf couldn't roll top tier genetics because he is a fucking loser. While dominant rams get massive, sweeping, majestic horns, tertaf is stuck with awkward, asymmetric little nubbins that constantly get stuck in wire fences @
    tertaf
    @tertaf .
  3. The Posture: Even on four legs, yertaf somehow managed to maintain a severe slouch. He walks around the petting zoo looking like a wet mattress that someone threw a fleece over.
Phase 2: a day in the life of tertaf the Goat

How does Tertaf spend his time now that he’s traded his keyboard for a patch of weeds? A standard daily routine looks roughly like this:

TimeActivityThe Reality
05:00 AMStanding on top of a rusty tractor.tertaf climbs the highest point in the enclosure just to stare blankly into the middle distance, pretending he's overlooking his domain, when he's actually just lost.
12:00 PMGrazing protocol.Eating old aluminum cans, discarded cardboard, and lawn clippings because human grocery store prices were too brutal for his budget.
04:30 PMScreaming at the wind.Letting out a blood curdling human sounding shriek that terrifies the normal goats and confuses the local farmers.
09:00 PMHeadbutting a wooden post.Trying to assert dominance over an inanimate object and knocking himself out cold for the third time this week.

Phase 3: Lessons learned from tertafs mistakes

JFL at anyone who thought tertaf was going to make it. He tried to max his stats and ended up locked in a petting zoo outside of toledo, chewing on visitors jacket zippers for attention.

Take notes, boys: Dont ascend to a true goat or you will end up like this faggot, and he will reaact :sick::sick::sick::sick::sick::sick: to this guide
is ts the new introduction to org :PepeLaugh:
 
  • JFL
Reactions: Iamspace

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