Social outcast despite looking decent

[blonde slayer]

I have been rated hmtn-lhtn on here but I have been a social outcast my whole life, I never get respected in groups of people after some time and I get left out and people talk behind my back.

There has never been a group of people more than 2 where this wasn't the case, I also don't have any close friends.

This forum always says if you good and are silent are is mysterious and not weird, but I guess the ntpill is too brutal

 

[larpcel]

This forum always says if you good and are silent are is mysterious and not weird, but I guess the ntpill is too brutal

If you actually believed this then there’s your problem

 

[Deleted member 255555]

I have been rated hmtn-lhtn on here but I have been a social outcast my whole life, I never get respected in groups of people after some time and I get left out and people talk behind my back.

There has never been a group of people more than 2 where this wasn't the case, I also don't have any close friends.

This forum always says if you good and are silent are is mysterious and not weird, but I guess the ntpill is too brutal

ND

 

[blonde slayer]

If you actually believed this then there’s your problem

I only partially believed it to use it as motivation to looksmax, I always had a thought in the back of my head that once I achieve some level of looks I will become not so socially outcaster and that's why I neglected socialmaxxing.

Masking worked for me before but ever since becoming older and getting hit with the fucking adult cortisol spikes (I moved out at 18 bcuz abusive mother) I can't keep the mask consistently.

I guess the only way is to finally be done with school and just isolate myself to focus on the money and looks grind (I keep telling myself if I am status/money/looksmaxxed THEN finally I will be okay, but even if that happens, unlikely)

Thing is, I never have problems with high inhib short term, it's when I am forced to be in a group of people for more than a few months then things start to loop out of control