Sultan's confession

[GIGA KHAN SULTAN]

I fucked my brothers gf i didnt like him when he was born i was the only child before he came along now i got to share but mama has to figure it out mama has to tell me im wrong she say boy you know your not supposed to sleep with that boys women i tell her wel mama he broke my toy when we was 9 years old and you threated him better then me i make up all kind of shit

 

[Deleted member 16571]

Zaporozhian Cossacks to the Turkish Sultan!
O sultan, Turkish devil and damned devil's kith and kin, secretary to Lucifer himself. What the devil kind of knight are thou, that canst not slay a hedgehog with your naked arse? The devil shits, and your army eats. Thou shalt not, thou son of a whore, make subjects of Christian sons. We have no fear of your army; by land and by sea we will battle with thee. Fuck thy mother.
Thou Babylonian scullion, Macedonian wheelwright, brewer of Jerusalem, goat-fucker of Alexandria, swineherd of Greater and Lesser Egypt, pig of Armenia, Podolian thief, catamite of Tartary, hangman of Kamyanets, and fool of all the world and underworld, an idiot before God, grandson of the Serpent, and the crick in our dick. Pig's snout, mare's arse, slaughterhouse cur, unchristened brow. Screw thine own mother!
So the Zaporozhians declare, you lowlife. You won't even be herding pigs for the Christians. Now we'll conclude, for we don't know the date and don't own a calendar; the moon's in the sky, the year with the Lord. The day's the same over here as it is over there; for this kiss our arse!
— Koshovyi otaman Ivan Sirko, with the whole Zaporozhian Host

 

[goldensoul]

ok next challenge. fuck your father's wife