The girl I was crushing on for 2 months has a "friend with benefits"

[Lonenely sigma]

This is quite possibly the most painful thing I've experienced to date but either way, imma type it all out.


For the past 2 months, I've been crushing on a girl. She was giving me signals, quite obvious ones, she gave me a cute nickname, her hugs were long and tight, she always looked me in the eyes while talking, she texted me first a few times to check whether I am good, liked all my stories etc.


So anyway, I am 20, and she's 22. I have a way older friend in my uni, he is 34, and I asked him about her. He told me:

"She's single but like... she has benefits with her ex"

-benefits... you mean like...?

"Yeah..."


Keep in mind, she was soo sweet and everything always, she also literally looks younger than me, its so difficult to connect in my mind.


-I thought it wasn't normalized here? I thought it was a thing in the west?

"Its been like this here for good 15 years... you are way too good of a person"

 

[takethezincpill]

Damn I’m sorry man

 

[BeanCelll]

Fuck just the title is brutal sorry man

 

[Sceptical]

soul crushing news bhai
i hope you're doing well

 

[mogs me]

This is quite possibly the most painful thing I've experienced to date but either way, imma type it all out.


For the past 2 months, I've been crushing on a girl. She was giving me signals, quite obvious ones, she gave me a cute nickname, her hugs were long and tight, she always looked me in the eyes while talking, she texted me first a few times to check whether I am good, liked all my stories etc.


So anyway, I am 20, and she's 22. I have a way older friend in my uni, he is 34, and I asked him about her. He told me:

"She's single but like... she has benefits with her ex"

-benefits... you mean like...?

"Yeah..."


Keep in mind, she was soo polite and everything always, she also literally looks younger than me, its so difficult to connect in my mind.


-I thought it wasn't normalized here? I thought it was a thing in the west?

"Its been like this here for good 15 years... you are way too good of a person"

It’s time to use some force my nigga

 

[Lonenely sigma]

Damn I’m sorry man

Fuck just the title is brutal sorry man

I've been crying for hours now, and I seem to have ran out of tears. She was so sweet to me, I already saw us together.

What a cruel world. I can't believe this.

 

[lastredeemer]

 

[takethezincpill]

I've been crying for hours now, and I seem to have ran out of tears. She was so sweet to me, I already saw us together.

What a cruel world. I can't believe this.

I’m so sorry man honestly

Get well soon

 

[nobodylovesme]

It's quite normal to have FWB with an ex.

You should talk to her about it, and ask if she wants a relationship.

She'll drop the ex, if she's ready to move on, no point overthinking it.

 

[BigBallsLarry]

name adds up

stupid whore, you can do better.

 

[bourgeoizyzz]

even worst when you take it to its logical conclusion

he's her ex, so she probably still has feelings

but he's using her as a fuck doll

 

[Lonenely sigma]

It's quite normal to have FWB with an ex.

You should talk to her about it, and ask if she wants a relationship.

She'll drop the ex, if she's ready to move on, no point overthinking it.

I can't be with a girl who had someone before me, I am waay too jealous, I'd overthink everything, not to mention it feels so shallow, like I am just another one in the line.


I just wanted to get with her, and truth be told I don't think I'd be with her now even if she approached me directly.

 

[BeanCelll]

It's quite normal to have FWB with an ex.

You should talk to her about it, and ask if she wants a relationship.

She'll drop the ex, if she's ready to move on, no point overthinking it.

Nigga please don't do this, this shit never works out

 

[Lonenely sigma]

even worst when you take it to its logical conclusion

he's her ex, so she probably still has feelings

but he's using her as a fuck doll

Hear this alright

She's an ACAB girl.

And he is A FUCKING COP

I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD YOU CANNOT MAKE THIS UP

 

[mogs me]

It's quite normal to have FWB with an ex.

You should talk to her about it, and ask if she wants a relationship.

She'll drop the ex, if she's ready to move on, no point overthinking it.

nigga we don’t live in Disney ts not happening it will embarrass op further

 

[bourgeoizyzz]

Hear this alright

She's an ACAB girl.

And he is A FUCKING COP

I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD YOU CANNOT MAKE THIS UP

jesus.

 

[nobodylovesme]

I can't be with a girl who had someone before me, I am waay too jealous, I'd overthink everything, not to mention it feels so shallow, like I am just another one in the line.


I just wanted to get with her, and truth be told I don't think I'd be with her now even if she approached me directly.

Nigga please don't do this, this shit never works out

Just being realistic, I doubt you'll ever find your virgin sweet girl fantasy gf, given you're rotting on this site.

It's normal to have had a relationship before, better to be having sex with an ex than whoring around, don't you think?

But it's your choice, I'm just giving you a realistic outlook. Think about it, do you seriously wanna lose this relationship you've had with her, just because she's sleeping with her ex?

 

[BeanCelll]

Hear this alright

She's an ACAB girl.

And he is A FUCKING COP

I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD YOU CANNOT MAKE THIS UP

brutalllll

they're all this way though

glad I never tried anything with any women I had even slight crushes on as an adolescent

Even then I was able to understand to see it was really was only my perception of them that made them so appealing, also knew it was over for me even back then

 

[BeanCelll]

Just being realistic, I doubt you'll ever find your virgin sweet girl fantasy gf, given you're rotting on this site.

Sure but at most he should treat her like a fwb aswell, this will never work out for a ltr

Even if it goes to the extreme and they get married he'll never forget this shit it'll always linger in the back of his mind

 

[brutal_blackpill]

you were her lapdog for 2 months for no reason. make a move next time quick or don't be friends with women.

You should have known this by now. But lessons learned, keep your chin up, and don't make the same mistake again.

Cut off all contact with her. Now.

 

[Lonenely sigma]

Just being realistic, I doubt you'll ever find your virgin sweet girl fantasy gf, given you're rotting on this site.

I agree

It's normal to have had a relationship before, better to be having sex with an ex than whoring around, don't you think?

Idk... to be honest, they hurt in different ways.

Just whoring around, sure, it is objectively worse, but how could you feel anything when she says "I love you" if you knew she said it before to someone else?

But it's your choice, I'm just giving you a realistic outlook. Think about it, do you seriously wanna lose this relationship you've had with her, just because she's sleeping with her ex?

How many relationships can she have then, in your opinion, before it becomes pointless to date her?

My point is, there is no point in being in a relationship if you aren't her first one and her only one for life.

 

[greycel]

People here are blaming the girl. You might be too
But realise she isn't to blame

The girl you envisioned never existed
You got carried away with your imagination. Just because she isn't the one, doesn't mean there never will be

 

[choppedshyt]

Inb4 this gets put in an edit

 

[Lonenely sigma]

you were her lapdog for 2 months for no reason. make a move next time quick or don't be friends with women.

You should have known this by now. But lessons learned, keep your chin up, and don't make the same mistake again.

Cut off all contact with her. Now.

I knew stories like mine existed, I know how the world works, its just that once you accept it, it all loses its meaning.

I wanted to believe if even for a short while. But now its too late. I got attached and hurt, and burned without winning anything out of it.

 

[brutal_blackpill]

I knew stories like mine existed, I know how the world works, its just that once you accept it, it all loses its meaning.

I wanted to believe if even for a short while. But now its too late. I got attached and hurt, and burned without winning anything out of it.

I'm sorry bro. I'd give you a hug if I could.

The truth doesn't care about your feelings. You need to accept it and live with it and try to enjoy it.

 

[BeanCelll]

The girl you envisioned never existed
You got carried away with your imagination

 

[Lonenely sigma]

People here are blaming the girl. You might be too
But realise she isn't to blame

The girl you envisioned never existed
You got carried away with your imagination. Just because she isn't the one, doesn't mean there never will be

I agree with everything except for the last part.

I created a fantasy as a way to cope with reality, but that fantasy was easily imaginable given that she truly seemed to care about me.

Now that I realized she's a completely different person to my idealization, its all gone forever.

 

[nobodylovesme]

I agree

Idk... to be honest, they hurt in different ways.

Just whoring around, sure, it is objectively worse, but how could you feel anything when she says "I love you" if you knew she said it before to someone else?

How many relationships can she have then, in your opinion, before it becomes pointless to date her?

My point is, there is no point in being in a relationship if you aren't her first one and her only one for life.

I agree it hurts. I was in a similar situation with a girl, and after a couple of weeks seeing her, she said she wants to be exclusive and that she had seen 1 guy, like 2 times before. It's just quite normal, but yeah, it's shitty.

If she really likes you and her behavior doesn't evoke much red flags, you should be focusing on that, not really about the numbers. But yeah, I agree there's some bound, like 15, that I could really not take seriously, unless she's had a complete mindset shift.

That's a fair opinion. I don't agree with it, as it's too unrealistic for me.

 

[iblamexyz]

This is quite possibly the most painful thing I've experienced to date but either way, imma type it all out.


For the past 2 months, I've been crushing on a girl. She was giving me signals, quite obvious ones, she gave me a cute nickname, her hugs were long and tight, she always looked me in the eyes while talking, she texted me first a few times to check whether I am good, liked all my stories etc.


So anyway, I am 20, and she's 22. I have a way older friend in my uni, he is 34, and I asked him about her. He told me:

"She's single but like... she has benefits with her ex"

-benefits... you mean like...?

"Yeah..."


Keep in mind, she was soo sweet and everything always, she also literally looks younger than me, its so difficult to connect in my mind.


-I thought it wasn't normalized here? I thought it was a thing in the west?

"Its been like this here for good 15 years... you are way too good of a person"

brutally ovER