pleasevanity
degenerate
- Joined
- Mar 21, 2026
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The grit, determination and strength you need to get up immediately after getting put down is admirable
But that's never been me. With the cards I've been dealt any amount of determination can easily be dubbed as naivety or foolishness. I should've never been born and I don't understand why I ever was. Just my birth alone, the environment I came from, the people that birthed me, those who were supposed to be my role models... all of it is messed up. None of it is how it should be, but how would I know? I've never seen what a healthy family is supposed to look like. Starting from scratch—no, less than that isn't something that's easy and I know I know life isn't supposed to be easy. But was it ever supposed to be this hard? Once you begin to lose those around you, you begin to lose yourself. You start to self-destruct into an entity that is unrecognisable, and from then on... It's far too late to climb back up, and the irony? You're left with nobody to blame but yourself.
It is admirable though, to see those people who have them famous success stories. It feels almost tangible if you delude yourself hard enough. But that was never you, that was never us, that was never me.
Newborns wail when opening their eyes for the first time.
But that's never been me. With the cards I've been dealt any amount of determination can easily be dubbed as naivety or foolishness. I should've never been born and I don't understand why I ever was. Just my birth alone, the environment I came from, the people that birthed me, those who were supposed to be my role models... all of it is messed up. None of it is how it should be, but how would I know? I've never seen what a healthy family is supposed to look like. Starting from scratch—no, less than that isn't something that's easy and I know I know life isn't supposed to be easy. But was it ever supposed to be this hard? Once you begin to lose those around you, you begin to lose yourself. You start to self-destruct into an entity that is unrecognisable, and from then on... It's far too late to climb back up, and the irony? You're left with nobody to blame but yourself.
It is admirable though, to see those people who have them famous success stories. It feels almost tangible if you delude yourself hard enough. But that was never you, that was never us, that was never me.
Newborns wail when opening their eyes for the first time.
