The micro treatments from people are eating me alive

[Turtle]

When people think about the pain of being ugly they usually think of not being able to get a girlfriend or a boyfriend or being lonely but it's so much more than just that

I notice the subtle little micro treatments I get from everyone, the uncomfortable body language, the difference in the way people talk to me wether it's being cold af or talking to me like I have down syndrome, the way people just ignore me at any function I go to, it's just little things like that that fucking eat me alive

Just today I was approaching this narrow alley on my bike and I saw some older guy walking his dog so I stopped and let him pass like any decent guy would and he just looked at me and didn't say thank you or even a little smile, literally just completely fucking snubbed me when I did the right thing, I made sure to look back and give him the stink eye and he was staring back too, I guarantee if I was a 5/10 guy facially he would've at least smiled and said thanks but I got literally nothing out of him and I returned home fucking spiralling severely over that one interaction

I could list more brutal interactions like that but that would be like 10 paragraphs long, the funny thing is that instead of just getting used to these micro treatments from people and becoming numb and desensitized to them, it actually hurts more and more each fucking time it happens which is like most times I go outside, it's like salt on a wound it's just increasingly hurting me more and more each time it happens, and idk how much longer I can stand noticing these micro treatments because it just makes me feel like even more of a repulsive fucking rat every single time

There's definitely something about me that really really fucking throws people off and whatever if is is immediately noticeable and I know it can't be my autism because that stuff isn't noticeable during the literal milliseconds of meeting people which leaves no other reason besides me just being flat out ugly or having a very unique/weird looking face, I can't think of anything else that would make me consistently get this type of treatment from people

 

[BaranPSL]

When people think about the pain of being ugly they usually think of not being able to get a girlfriend or a boyfriend or being lonely but it's so much more than just that

I notice the subtle little micro treatments I get from everyone, the uncomfortable body language, the difference in the way people talk to me wether it's being cold af or talking to me like I have down syndrome, the way people just ignore me at any function I go to, it's just little things like that that fucking eat me alive

Just today I was approaching this narrow alley on my bike and I saw some older guy walking his dog so I stopped and let him pass like any decent guy would and he just looked at me and didn't say thank you or even a little smile, literally just completely fucking snubbed me when I did the right thing, I made sure to look back and give him the stink eye and he was staring back too, I guarantee if I was a 5/10 guy facially he would've at least smiled and said thanks but I got literally nothing out of him and I returned home fucking spiralling severely over that one interaction

I could list more brutal interactions like that but that would be like 10 paragraphs long, the funny thing is that instead of just getting used to these micro treatments from people and becoming numb and desensitized to them, it actually hurts more and more each fucking time it happens which is like most times I go outside, it's like salt on a wound it's just increasingly hurting me more and more each time it happens, and idk how much longer I can stand noticing these micro treatments because it just makes me feel like even more of a repulsive fucking rat every single time

There's definitely something about me that really really fucking throws people off and whatever if is is immediately noticeable and I know it can't be my autism because that stuff isn't noticeable during the literal milliseconds of meeting people which leaves no other reason besides me just being flat out ugly or having a very unique/weird looking face, I can't think of anything else that would make me consistently get this type of treatment from people

God loves you,
Don't rope one day because of cruel world and humanity g, my blessings will be with thee. Lmk if you wanna talk anytime.

 

[0 bone mass]

absolutely brutal

 

[Acquiescence]

Brutal

 

[gigacumster3000]

lmfao ur so delusional fr nobody cares about u that much cels