mocco
Iron
- Joined
- Aug 17, 2026
- Posts
- 117
- Reputation
- 88
Writing this to get it off my chest.
I was 14 at that time. I never had a real true friend I could talk to about anything, felt so fucking alone and as if there is no point to live, feeling like shit all the time, i was also addicted to weed and hash to cope but that wasn´t enough to make me want to live, i didn't have a rope so i tied a bunch of blanket covers to make a rope and placed it where the curtain hangs at, I was committed to it, lifted my legs with the makeshift rope and started choking, but what saved me is that the thing holding the curtain where i placed the rope, broke, so if that didn´t break while, i wouldn´t be here.
I'm 17 now, looking back and so grateful that I'm alive now, life can seem so dark and pointless that suicide really seems like a good solution to cope, it is not, if you ever feel like this talk to a professional if you don't have any friends. And also, this made me so humble, i never just randomly be mean at somebody cause you never know if you make them hit their breaking point.
My breaking point was when as a new student at a school in a new country, people thought it was funny being around me then suddenly all running away from me as a group, to leave me standing there by myself again.
I'm still dealing with loneliness but working on music, djing, art, so someday i can be around people who do the same so i can have friends that i can finally relate too.
im crying my eyes off as im writing this, just need this off my chest and i hope this touches somebody else, you are not alone.
Make it your life goal to find a purpose and pursue it, so suicide looks like an option you never wanna look at.
I was 14 at that time. I never had a real true friend I could talk to about anything, felt so fucking alone and as if there is no point to live, feeling like shit all the time, i was also addicted to weed and hash to cope but that wasn´t enough to make me want to live, i didn't have a rope so i tied a bunch of blanket covers to make a rope and placed it where the curtain hangs at, I was committed to it, lifted my legs with the makeshift rope and started choking, but what saved me is that the thing holding the curtain where i placed the rope, broke, so if that didn´t break while, i wouldn´t be here.
I'm 17 now, looking back and so grateful that I'm alive now, life can seem so dark and pointless that suicide really seems like a good solution to cope, it is not, if you ever feel like this talk to a professional if you don't have any friends. And also, this made me so humble, i never just randomly be mean at somebody cause you never know if you make them hit their breaking point.
My breaking point was when as a new student at a school in a new country, people thought it was funny being around me then suddenly all running away from me as a group, to leave me standing there by myself again.
I'm still dealing with loneliness but working on music, djing, art, so someday i can be around people who do the same so i can have friends that i can finally relate too.
im crying my eyes off as im writing this, just need this off my chest and i hope this touches somebody else, you are not alone.
Make it your life goal to find a purpose and pursue it, so suicide looks like an option you never wanna look at.
