OnlyWs
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I was at a pub about a year ago, unusually busy for January.
I was there with a couple friends and it was my turn to buy a round so I went up to the bar.
It took a few minutes to reach the front and get my order in. When I got to the front of the bar, u happened to find myself beside a girl that looked about 22 with fake blonde hair and a very ‘English’ pheno. Fake tan, lip filler etc.
Many chuds would be fooled by all the clown paint on her face but I knew PSL and could see her recessed maxilla from a mile away.
So I waited to order my drink, minding my own business until I heard a screechy voice to my right request a “espresso martini”.
Strangely, this request seemed to not be directed at the bar but towards my direction. So I turned to my right and sure enough this slightly overweight MTB was looking at me.
“excuse me?” I said to her. “An espresso martini, that’s what I’ll have, I assume you want to get me a drink coming up next me like that”.
Being 4 Guiness deep at this point I found the entitlement of this skank bemusing. The subpar facial development paired with aggressive entitlement of the women here was something I had made my peace with years ago.
Not wanting to lower my mood or risk being kicked out for causing a scene, I replied that I had a girlfriend and that I don’t she’d appreciate me buying another girl a drink.
I thought that would be the end of things but as I turned back to face the bar she replied “sure” sarcastically and then said “if you’re broke you can just say so”.
At that moment I was finally able to order my drinks. Then I turned back to face the caked up MTB and smiled as I said, “what do you do for work?”.
I assumed she would reply some low level menial job and her statement to me was projection.
But she answered “I’m a model”.
Another smile formed on my face as I processed that this, at best, MTB with her bad fake tan, shitty veneers, huge forehead and recessed bone structure could possibly say she was a model with a straight face.
In my drunken flow state I instantly thought of a good reply that would put this English uggo in her place.
“Oh nice” I said letting my validation of her delusions stay in the air for a second.
“What type of model?” I then asked mustering up a genuine sounding delivery.
“Huh?” the lady grunted at me, clearly caught off guard.
“What type of modelling do you do? Hand, feet?” I asked.
The genuine nature of my inquiry caused her to stutter and meekly reply that was an “instagram model” while breaking eye contact for the first time.
“Really?” I said, my tone clearly communicating my surprise.
Just at that moment my drinks arrived. I picked them up and as I turned to walk away.
I said “good luck with that” with as much sarcasm as I had received earlier.
I was there with a couple friends and it was my turn to buy a round so I went up to the bar.
It took a few minutes to reach the front and get my order in. When I got to the front of the bar, u happened to find myself beside a girl that looked about 22 with fake blonde hair and a very ‘English’ pheno. Fake tan, lip filler etc.
Many chuds would be fooled by all the clown paint on her face but I knew PSL and could see her recessed maxilla from a mile away.
So I waited to order my drink, minding my own business until I heard a screechy voice to my right request a “espresso martini”.
Strangely, this request seemed to not be directed at the bar but towards my direction. So I turned to my right and sure enough this slightly overweight MTB was looking at me.
“excuse me?” I said to her. “An espresso martini, that’s what I’ll have, I assume you want to get me a drink coming up next me like that”.
Being 4 Guiness deep at this point I found the entitlement of this skank bemusing. The subpar facial development paired with aggressive entitlement of the women here was something I had made my peace with years ago.
Not wanting to lower my mood or risk being kicked out for causing a scene, I replied that I had a girlfriend and that I don’t she’d appreciate me buying another girl a drink.
I thought that would be the end of things but as I turned back to face the bar she replied “sure” sarcastically and then said “if you’re broke you can just say so”.
At that moment I was finally able to order my drinks. Then I turned back to face the caked up MTB and smiled as I said, “what do you do for work?”.
I assumed she would reply some low level menial job and her statement to me was projection.
But she answered “I’m a model”.
Another smile formed on my face as I processed that this, at best, MTB with her bad fake tan, shitty veneers, huge forehead and recessed bone structure could possibly say she was a model with a straight face.
In my drunken flow state I instantly thought of a good reply that would put this English uggo in her place.
“Oh nice” I said letting my validation of her delusions stay in the air for a second.
“What type of model?” I then asked mustering up a genuine sounding delivery.
“Huh?” the lady grunted at me, clearly caught off guard.
“What type of modelling do you do? Hand, feet?” I asked.
The genuine nature of my inquiry caused her to stutter and meekly reply that was an “instagram model” while breaking eye contact for the first time.
“Really?” I said, my tone clearly communicating my surprise.
Just at that moment my drinks arrived. I picked them up and as I turned to walk away.
I said “good luck with that” with as much sarcasm as I had received earlier.