hollywoodngl
Shred Bundy
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How I Went From Invisible 5'8 Guy to Memorable & Slaying
Aesthetics (lifting, skincare, fashion, hair, etc.) are the foundation - they get you noticed and respected. Once you have that base, adding real skills is what makes you stand out in people's minds, creates better conversations, and helps with longer-term attraction and social circles. This is the layer that turns “he looks good” into "he's actually cool and I'm going to chase him".
I'm 25, 5'8, 125lbs at ~10-12% body fat, living around London. Rated myself HLTN throughout. Before stacking these skills my dating life was basically non-existent. I was invisible in school, barely talked to girls, and any interactions I did have usually died quickly. Adding these on top of my other maxxing helped me become way more memorable.
In this guide I break down my exact stack in full detail: why each skill category matters, multiple ideas and alternatives for each, realistic timelines, step-by-step implementation advice, common mistakes to avoid, real anecdotes from my life (including the ones with women), supporting studies with direct links, the hard parts I faced, and the actual results I saw.
The 4-Skill Stack
1. Technical Skill (The Creator / Builder)
This category is all about showing that you have intelligence, logical thinking, problem-solving ability, and the drive to actually create things from scratch instead of just consuming what others make. In today's world where so many people scroll endlessly, being able to build functional digital stuff immediately makes you stand out as someone capable and forward-thinking. It's excellent for demonstrating value both in real-life conversations and online. You can literally show people what you've made on your phone or laptop. It also has strong moneymaxxing potential because these skills transfer directly into freelance work, side projects, or even full-time career opportunities.
Meta-analysis evidence shows learning to code produces moderate positive transfer effects to other cognitive skills (overall g = 0.49), with stronger effects for creative thinking, mathematical skills, metacognition, spatial skills, and reasoning: The Cognitive Benefits of Learning Computer Programming: A Meta-Analysis of Transfer Effects (Scherer et al., 2019)
My Main Choice: JavaScript progressing into React.js and Next.js, building on the small foundations I already had from school (VS Code usage, a bit of Python, and Java for making Minecraft plugins). I chose this path because JavaScript is extremely versatile for web development, which is visible and shareable. It allowed me to quickly build things I could show people, and the React/Next.js progression let me create modern, responsive applications that look professional. This combination gave me both quick wins and long-term depth without needing super advanced math or systems knowledge early on.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
Implementation Steps
Use Cases & Tips: Pull up projects on your phone during dates or group hangouts when the conversation naturally leads there - it turns abstract talk into something tangible. Offer to build something small and useful for friends or a girl you're talking to (like a simple site or tool). It's an easy way to stand out and show genuine effort. Over time this skill also helps with confidence because you have tangible proof of your abilities to point to. You can use it for moneymaxxing by offering small freelance gigs once you're decent.
2. Artistic / Creative Skill (The Vibe Creator)
This category focuses on developing the ability to create entertainment, atmosphere, and memorable experiences. It positions you as someone who brings energy, culture, and fun into social situations rather than just being a passive participant. In a world full of people who show up and consume, being the one who actively creates good vibes or artistic output makes you far more noticeable and desirable to be around. It also gives you natural conversation starters and social proof because people love being connected to someone who can make nights more enjoyable or produce something creative.
Music has strong links to social bonding, emotional connection, and increased perceived attractiveness in performance contexts: Music and social bonding: "self-other" merging and neurohormonal mechanisms (Tarr et al., 2014)
My Main Choice: Music production combined with DJing. I chose this because it's relatively quick to get decent at with focused practice, and it has high social visibility. Learning Rekordbox or similar software let me mix tracks and play live sets, which directly translated into real events and performances. The creative side also let me express myself in ways that felt fun rather than purely technical.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
Implementation Steps
Use Cases & Tips: Offer to DJ small gatherings or pre-games with friends - it instantly makes you the centre of positive attention and gives you social proof. Cooking a nice meal or mixing drinks for someone shows effort and creativity in a very personal way. These skills pair especially well with your aesthetics because they give you something active and impressive to bring to social situations, turning a normal night into a memorable one.
Here are some real examples from my journey:
3. Social & Charisma Skill (The Communicator)
This is the skill category that acts as a multiplier for everything else. It turns your looks, technical abilities, and creative talents into actual conversations, dates, and deeper connections. Many guys have good aesthetics or interesting hobbies but still struggle because they can't express themselves confidently or handle social situations smoothly. Building this area removes that bottleneck and gives you the ability to lead interactions, hold attention in groups, and turn casual meetings into something more meaningful.
Exposure therapy is the gold-standard, evidence-based treatment for social anxiety disorder, working through habituation and desensitisation to feared situations (including social rejection): Goldin et al. / PMC (2023 review)
My Main Choice: Cold approach combined with deliberate public speaking and storytelling practice. I trained this through high-volume real-world repetition rather than just theory because nothing beats actual experience. Whether that be at work, presenting to 50 people, or in a club talking to a whole friend group at once to win over 1 girl.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
Implementation Steps
Use Cases & Tips: This skill shines on dates (smoother flow and deeper talks), at parties (holding court in groups), in group settings (leading conversations), and when networking (turning casual chats into opportunities). Use it to turn technical or artistic demonstrations into engaging stories that people remember. Practice leading conversations so you can naturally bring up your other skills without forcing them. Over time it makes every other improvement you are doing way more effective because you can actually showcase what you've built in a compelling way.
I was happy to go anywhere as long as I had a mate or two with me. I toured the whole country for nights out and more opportunities to cold approach women. I went to Worcester, Nottingham, Manchester, Liverpool, London, Portsmouth, Leeds, etc., and I didn't live in any of those places. Nottingham was a great night out as the ladies/men ratio is extremely high. It was good to go and meet up with mates at university or college, the volume and variety of environments made a massive difference.
4. Physical Combat Skill (The Protector)
This category adds real functional capability and a quiet, grounded confidence that regular gym training alone doesn't always provide. It helps you carry yourself with more presence and removes any lingering subconscious feelings of vulnerability. When combined with your existing lifting and aesthetics, it creates a more complete and capable image that people subconsciously pick up on.
Studies have found significant relationships between martial arts practice and higher self-concept/self-confidence in areas like physical ability, ethics, and intellectual self-view: Comparison Study of Self Concept and Self Efficacy in Martial Arts (2014)
My Main Choice: Boxing, which I've done on and off since I was around 15 years old. I reached a solid level of self-defence competence by my mid-20s. I stuck with boxing because it's straightforward, builds power and conditioning, and translates well to real-world confidence without needing complex rules early on.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
Implementation Steps
Use Cases & Tips: This skill shows up in how you carry yourself on nights out (more relaxed presence), on dates (quiet assurance), or in any situation where presence matters. It pairs extremely well with your physique because it adds a layer of real-world capability that people can sense. Many guys notice they feel more relaxed and confident in social settings once they have this foundation - you stop subconsciously shrinking and start standing taller.
Overall Progression, Mindset & Practical Tips
Suggested Order
Combat training first for a confidence foundation -> heavy cold approach volume -> layer technical and artistic skills on top while maintaining everything else.
Daily/Weekly Structure
Mindset Notes
I felt like quitting on many days, especially during plateaus. Consistency and raw discipline carried me through when motivation was low. Small daily wins compound faster than most people realise.
Stacking Ideas
Tracking & Motivation
Keep a simple log of your sessions and positive moments. Share progress here for accountability. Reward consistent streaks.
Results & Broader Benefits I Noticed
The skills made me noticeably more memorable alongside my aesthetics work. Interactions became easier and more positive overall.
- Technical projects helped create real closeness (cat site example).
- Artistic performances led to girls approaching me.
- Social volume delivered numbers and hookups.
- Combat demonstrations created strong positive validation from social circles.
Additional benefits included better performance in job interviews, easier networking, and improved general confidence in new situations.
Handling Setbacks
Early rejections were tough - girls laughing, being rude, or outright dismissing polite approaches. With repetition they became much easier to handle. Plateaus are normal, the solution was simply keeping the daily habit even when sessions felt average or uninspiring.
Final Advice & Getting Started
Pick one skill today and complete the first 30 - 60 minute session right now. Don't wait for the perfect moment or high motivation. The beginning is always the hardest part, but momentum builds quickly once you start.
Quick starting resources:
This exact stack worked well for me as a regular 5'8 guy. Combine it with your existing aesthetics work and keep progressing.
Drop your current situation, which skill you're starting with first, any alternative ideas you like, or questions below.
Stay consistent, bros. These skills will give you more to offer and more interesting stories to tell over time.
Aesthetics (lifting, skincare, fashion, hair, etc.) are the foundation - they get you noticed and respected. Once you have that base, adding real skills is what makes you stand out in people's minds, creates better conversations, and helps with longer-term attraction and social circles. This is the layer that turns “he looks good” into "he's actually cool and I'm going to chase him".
I'm 25, 5'8, 125lbs at ~10-12% body fat, living around London. Rated myself HLTN throughout. Before stacking these skills my dating life was basically non-existent. I was invisible in school, barely talked to girls, and any interactions I did have usually died quickly. Adding these on top of my other maxxing helped me become way more memorable.
In this guide I break down my exact stack in full detail: why each skill category matters, multiple ideas and alternatives for each, realistic timelines, step-by-step implementation advice, common mistakes to avoid, real anecdotes from my life (including the ones with women), supporting studies with direct links, the hard parts I faced, and the actual results I saw.
The 4-Skill Stack
1. Technical Skill (The Creator / Builder)
This category is all about showing that you have intelligence, logical thinking, problem-solving ability, and the drive to actually create things from scratch instead of just consuming what others make. In today's world where so many people scroll endlessly, being able to build functional digital stuff immediately makes you stand out as someone capable and forward-thinking. It's excellent for demonstrating value both in real-life conversations and online. You can literally show people what you've made on your phone or laptop. It also has strong moneymaxxing potential because these skills transfer directly into freelance work, side projects, or even full-time career opportunities.
Meta-analysis evidence shows learning to code produces moderate positive transfer effects to other cognitive skills (overall g = 0.49), with stronger effects for creative thinking, mathematical skills, metacognition, spatial skills, and reasoning: The Cognitive Benefits of Learning Computer Programming: A Meta-Analysis of Transfer Effects (Scherer et al., 2019)
My Main Choice: JavaScript progressing into React.js and Next.js, building on the small foundations I already had from school (VS Code usage, a bit of Python, and Java for making Minecraft plugins). I chose this path because JavaScript is extremely versatile for web development, which is visible and shareable. It allowed me to quickly build things I could show people, and the React/Next.js progression let me create modern, responsive applications that look professional. This combination gave me both quick wins and long-term depth without needing super advanced math or systems knowledge early on.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
- Python for writing automation scripts, data tools, or simple bots that solve everyday problems - great if you want something that feels immediately useful for productivity.
- Video editing or motion graphics (especially useful if you make content or want to edit clips for social media) - perfect for visual creators who want to produce polished videos.
- Basic app development or even no-code platforms like Bubble or Adalo for creating functional mobile tools - ideal if you prefer faster prototyping without heavy coding.
- Graphic design work in Figma or Canva - you can design custom logos, social media templates, or mockups that look professional and are easy to show off visually.
Implementation Steps
- Dedicate a consistent 90 minutes every single day: follow structured tutorials in the morning and then immediately apply what you learned by building something small.
- Work toward creating a clean portfolio site where you can showcase everything you've made - this becomes your “proof” piece.
- Look for opportunities to make something personalised - whether it's a small tool, a fun interactive page, or a custom dashboard for someone you're interested in.
- Big mistake to avoid: falling into perfectionism and never shipping anything. Get version 1 out there (even if it's ugly) and improve it over time, momentum is everything. Track your projects weekly to see progress.
Use Cases & Tips: Pull up projects on your phone during dates or group hangouts when the conversation naturally leads there - it turns abstract talk into something tangible. Offer to build something small and useful for friends or a girl you're talking to (like a simple site or tool). It's an easy way to stand out and show genuine effort. Over time this skill also helps with confidence because you have tangible proof of your abilities to point to. You can use it for moneymaxxing by offering small freelance gigs once you're decent.
2. Artistic / Creative Skill (The Vibe Creator)
This category focuses on developing the ability to create entertainment, atmosphere, and memorable experiences. It positions you as someone who brings energy, culture, and fun into social situations rather than just being a passive participant. In a world full of people who show up and consume, being the one who actively creates good vibes or artistic output makes you far more noticeable and desirable to be around. It also gives you natural conversation starters and social proof because people love being connected to someone who can make nights more enjoyable or produce something creative.
Music has strong links to social bonding, emotional connection, and increased perceived attractiveness in performance contexts: Music and social bonding: "self-other" merging and neurohormonal mechanisms (Tarr et al., 2014)
My Main Choice: Music production combined with DJing. I chose this because it's relatively quick to get decent at with focused practice, and it has high social visibility. Learning Rekordbox or similar software let me mix tracks and play live sets, which directly translated into real events and performances. The creative side also let me express myself in ways that felt fun rather than purely technical.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
- Beatmaking and music production (creating original tracks or beats) - good for those who want to create rather than just mix.
- Learning an instrument like guitar or singing, even at a basic level - classic and always impressive in social settings.
- High-level cooking or mixology (creating impressive meals or cocktails) - practical and sensory, great for dates.
- Drawing, digital art, illustration, or even simple graffiti/street art - creative outlet with visual results people can see immediately.
Implementation Steps
- Commit to daily practice sessions - even 60 minutes of mixing, producing, or creating content makes a huge difference over time. Start with free software trials.
- Record everything you do and share it in small circles first for feedback and to build a body of work.
- Start performing or showcasing in low-pressure environments like house parties or pre-games, then gradually move to bigger opportunities.
- Focus more on creating good energy and reading the room rather than obsessing over perfect technical skills early on - the vibe matters most.
Use Cases & Tips: Offer to DJ small gatherings or pre-games with friends - it instantly makes you the centre of positive attention and gives you social proof. Cooking a nice meal or mixing drinks for someone shows effort and creativity in a very personal way. These skills pair especially well with your aesthetics because they give you something active and impressive to bring to social situations, turning a normal night into a memorable one.
Here are some real examples from my journey:
- I started DJing in my bedroom with just a controller and free software - simple mixes at first, but it built the foundation fast.
- I got a hand-written invite to Drake's London O2 tour "Assassination Vacation" after people saw my sets.
- I had a billboard up for one of my DJ albums - massive visibility.
- I DJ'd a 700-person venue with big rappers on the lineup - the energy was insane and led to girls approaching me after the set.
3. Social & Charisma Skill (The Communicator)
This is the skill category that acts as a multiplier for everything else. It turns your looks, technical abilities, and creative talents into actual conversations, dates, and deeper connections. Many guys have good aesthetics or interesting hobbies but still struggle because they can't express themselves confidently or handle social situations smoothly. Building this area removes that bottleneck and gives you the ability to lead interactions, hold attention in groups, and turn casual meetings into something more meaningful.
Exposure therapy is the gold-standard, evidence-based treatment for social anxiety disorder, working through habituation and desensitisation to feared situations (including social rejection): Goldin et al. / PMC (2023 review)
My Main Choice: Cold approach combined with deliberate public speaking and storytelling practice. I trained this through high-volume real-world repetition rather than just theory because nothing beats actual experience. Whether that be at work, presenting to 50 people, or in a club talking to a whole friend group at once to win over 1 girl.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
- Practice quick thinking and humour under pressure during normal conversation, where you hear an opportunity to make a funny comment, go in.
- Hosting small events, game nights, or group activities - forces you to lead and manage social dynamics.
- Focused storytelling and conversation mastery practice (record yourself telling stories).
- Structured public speaking through work for formal delivery skills.
Implementation Steps
- Set clear weekly targets for approaches or social practice and actually track them so you can see progress.
- After each approach take a few minutes to review what went well and what you could improve - treat it like training.
- Start in easier or higher-energy environments and gradually move to more challenging ones as your tolerance builds.
- Progress from alcohol-supported practice to fully sober execution and leading group conversations, the sober version is where real confidence comes from.
Use Cases & Tips: This skill shines on dates (smoother flow and deeper talks), at parties (holding court in groups), in group settings (leading conversations), and when networking (turning casual chats into opportunities). Use it to turn technical or artistic demonstrations into engaging stories that people remember. Practice leading conversations so you can naturally bring up your other skills without forcing them. Over time it makes every other improvement you are doing way more effective because you can actually showcase what you've built in a compelling way.
I was happy to go anywhere as long as I had a mate or two with me. I toured the whole country for nights out and more opportunities to cold approach women. I went to Worcester, Nottingham, Manchester, Liverpool, London, Portsmouth, Leeds, etc., and I didn't live in any of those places. Nottingham was a great night out as the ladies/men ratio is extremely high. It was good to go and meet up with mates at university or college, the volume and variety of environments made a massive difference.
4. Physical Combat Skill (The Protector)
This category adds real functional capability and a quiet, grounded confidence that regular gym training alone doesn't always provide. It helps you carry yourself with more presence and removes any lingering subconscious feelings of vulnerability. When combined with your existing lifting and aesthetics, it creates a more complete and capable image that people subconsciously pick up on.
Studies have found significant relationships between martial arts practice and higher self-concept/self-confidence in areas like physical ability, ethics, and intellectual self-view: Comparison Study of Self Concept and Self Efficacy in Martial Arts (2014)
My Main Choice: Boxing, which I've done on and off since I was around 15 years old. I reached a solid level of self-defence competence by my mid-20s. I stuck with boxing because it's straightforward, builds power and conditioning, and translates well to real-world confidence without needing complex rules early on.
Other Ideas & Alternatives
- Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu or Muay Thai for different fighting styles and ground work - excellent for control and practicality.
- Wrestling or kickboxing classes for explosive power and takedown defence.
- Rock climbing or advanced calisthenics for functional strength and body control that looks impressive.
- Basic self-defence focused martial arts classes if you want quick applicability.
Implementation Steps
- Train 2 - 3 times per week, mixing it with your regular lifting routine so it complements your physique work.
- Focus on both technical skill (proper form, combinations) and the mental confidence that comes from knowing you can defend yourself.
- Emphasise controlled sparring and practical application rather than just fitness - real pressure builds real confidence.
- Start slow with technique drills and bag work before adding sparring to avoid injury and build sustainably.
Use Cases & Tips: This skill shows up in how you carry yourself on nights out (more relaxed presence), on dates (quiet assurance), or in any situation where presence matters. It pairs extremely well with your physique because it adds a layer of real-world capability that people can sense. Many guys notice they feel more relaxed and confident in social settings once they have this foundation - you stop subconsciously shrinking and start standing taller.
Overall Progression, Mindset & Practical Tips
Suggested Order
Combat training first for a confidence foundation -> heavy cold approach volume -> layer technical and artistic skills on top while maintaining everything else.
Daily/Weekly Structure
- Minimum 1 hour total across skills every day.
- Pick one main focus area per week if you need structure.
- Do a quick weekly review of what went well and what needs adjusting.
Mindset Notes
I felt like quitting on many days, especially during plateaus. Consistency and raw discipline carried me through when motivation was low. Small daily wins compound faster than most people realise.
Stacking Ideas
- DJ a small party.
- Use the confidence from fighting training to approach more comfortably.
- Combine cooking with social skills by hosting small dinners or get-togethers.
Tracking & Motivation
Keep a simple log of your sessions and positive moments. Share progress here for accountability. Reward consistent streaks.
Results & Broader Benefits I Noticed
The skills made me noticeably more memorable alongside my aesthetics work. Interactions became easier and more positive overall.
- Technical projects helped create real closeness (cat site example).
- Artistic performances led to girls approaching me.
- Social volume delivered numbers and hookups.
- Combat demonstrations created strong positive validation from social circles.
Additional benefits included better performance in job interviews, easier networking, and improved general confidence in new situations.
Handling Setbacks
Early rejections were tough - girls laughing, being rude, or outright dismissing polite approaches. With repetition they became much easier to handle. Plateaus are normal, the solution was simply keeping the daily habit even when sessions felt average or uninspiring.
Final Advice & Getting Started
Pick one skill today and complete the first 30 - 60 minute session right now. Don't wait for the perfect moment or high motivation. The beginning is always the hardest part, but momentum builds quickly once you start.
Quick starting resources:
- Technical: Codecademy, Udemy courses, Codewars.
- Artistic: YouTube mixing tutorials and music production tutorials on YouTube.
- Social: Set a realistic goal of 5 - 10 approaches this week.
- Combat: Local boxing gym or beginner classes.
This exact stack worked well for me as a regular 5'8 guy. Combine it with your existing aesthetics work and keep progressing.
Drop your current situation, which skill you're starting with first, any alternative ideas you like, or questions below.
Stay consistent, bros. These skills will give you more to offer and more interesting stories to tell over time.
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