there is nothing i can do

[foxhead131]

i dont really have any friends, not irl friends at least. what friends i did have were never there for me. my entire life ive been chasing people years after years just looking for a friend, sometimes i got temporary friends that left after a while, most times i got bullied. i remember i had this one friend who said to me once, "yo bro when you walk with me all the girls leave me alone," then he said some insult and laughed, i cant remember. that made me realize how fucking over it is.


I'm ltn and maybe very low lmtn on a good day, im 6'0 with a 16.5inch bidelt, a wide waist, and one clavicle is wider than the other slightly. my face is heavily recessed, my only good trait being my mid height (people are tall where i live) and, the worst part, im diagnosed autistic and have been babied my entire life by my family. its so bad i just wanna rope at this point. i just wonder if my friends would miss me when im gone. they never cared when i vented.

its actually funny, i think i can achieve an aesthetic physique with my shit genes, no matter how hard i try i will never make up for my horrid gross bone structure.

I once cried when someone was nice to me because no one does that to me really. Sometimes i feel like i deserve it for being mean in the past.