arlo_420
Silver
- Joined
- Dec 26, 2025
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Brought a vibrator. Kinda embarrassed and disgusted.
So today I went to Spencer’s and kinda impulse purchased a vibrator. I’ve been wanting one for a while and I figured today’s the day. Plus, it was really the first time I was at the mall alone without my mom or siblings so it was just the right time. It was embarrassing at check out though, but the lady understood and could tell I was nervous I think.
Anyways, I used it when I got home and I literally don’t know how to describe it. It’s literally the best feeling I’ve ever had down there. Very very intense. And in the moment I really enjoyed it. It’s the first time I’ve ever really gotten something that good out of masturbating, mostly because all the other stuff I try is either way less intense or I just do it wrong.
But now after the fact, I’m really embarrassed for some reason. It’s not like anyone in my house knows about what I did or anything, but I just feel like I did something “wrong”. Like I shouldn’t have brought it in the first place. Something about the whole thing kinda makes me feel disgusted with myself. Does anyone know how to get over this feeling? Like I said, I enjoyed the experience in the moment and kind of want to do it again. But I do think I’ll be able to if I’m gonna feel like this every time after it.
Asked the guy I was dating about abortion and he showed me his true colors
I (20F) had been dating this guy (24M) for about one month when we had a conversation about abortion. We hadn't had sex before because I had an iffy feeling about him but I couldn't say why so I didn't even let him kiss me or anything.
By the way I live in an European country where you can abort up to 12 weeks and don't really face any problems regarding that besides maybe the high price for the abortion.
It's always been a sensitive topic for me, even though I consider myself a rational person. In past relationships, I’ve brought it up early to see where the guy stands, and both of my exes gave what I considered the perfect response: "I don't have an opinion, it's the woman's choice, and I’ll support whatever she decides." So when I asked this guy about it, I was not expecting his answer. I mean I kind of did since he always claims to be traditional, which he isn't exactly since he smokes, drinks a lot and talks about sex a lot even though I told him it makes me uncomfortable.
He told me, "I wouldn't love the woman anymore if she got an abortion and killed our child. I'd be too sad to know she killed our love. I would leave her."
I was honestly shocked. First of all, "killed" isn’t the right term, and second of all - what? He quickly tried to backpedal, adding things like, "It’s okay if the woman's life is in danger" and "No, I wouldn’t leave you." But he kept justifying his position by bringing up his faith, which felt especially disrespectful. Until now, he barely mentioned his religion, but suddenly it was the reason behind his opinion.
What really upset me, though, was when he said, "Women nowadays go to clubs, sleep around, and then get abortions. They kill children. It shouldn’t be normalized. Most women are whores. They treat abortion like it’s going to McDonald's." This was just disgusting. I told him how dangerous and hurtful those kinds of generalizations are, especially considering how many women in the US are suffering because of abortion bans. I think it's heartbreaking that men who don’t understand the reality of women’s health and autonomy think they should have a say in something so personal.
He got angry and tried to deflect, saying, "You always act all traditional and arrogant, but you sent me a picture of your boobs." To clarify, it was a bikini pic, just showing him that my top didn’t fit properly since we were talking about women's sizing including bras and it wasn’t sexual. Also, he had pictures in his Instagram highlights where his female friends were wearing bikinis. But he used that as a way to shame me, which was infuriating. He was always the one bringing up sexual questions, even when I told him it made me uncomfortable, and yet he tried to play the "traditional" card.
After that, I was done. I told him I never wanted to hear from him again because his views were harmful and disrespectful. That was a couple of days ago and he’s been spamming my phone every day, begging for another chance, telling me I’m his "dream wife," (probably because he is into my looks and me wanting to be a tradwife) and even saying he’d change his views for me.
I can’t be with someone like that. Not only do I disagree with his stance, but it also breaks my heart to see how many women, especially in places like the US, are suffering because of abortion bans. I read everyday the articles and I pray for the women in the US. This is now a deeply personal issue for me, and I can’t be with a man who doesn’t respect a woman’s right to choose.
Extra: He also mentioned how he had rejected girls because they already took of their clothes by the second date. He let them feel comfortable enough to do that, so he isn't in a position to shame anyone. Also, he tried to kiss and hold my hands on the first few dates a couple of times and I didn't let him so huh, who is the problem. Also, in my last relationships I already had sex or kissed them by the third date because I don't care about how long we are dating - when I trust you then I trust you. It doesn't matter how early or late a woman decides to have sex and it doesn't determinate her worth.
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Update: I didn't expect this to blow up but thank y'all for your nice words! I'm always someone who walks away fast, especially in the beginning so it was an instant decision for me. I know it isn't always easy for everyone and there might be women out there who are still with a man they actually don't want but they feel trapped to whatever reason since they have already invested too much time and energy into their relationship. You are not alone. Don't think to yourself "If I walk away now, I have just wasted xy months or years of my life." No, tell yourself "I have saved the next 60 years of my life."
Anyways, he thankfully has stopped spamming me since this morning. I'm not responding and to be honest, I'm kind of afraid of blocking him. He seems to be the type of guy who would try to contact me one way or another and I'm scared of what he could be capable of. I rather wait for him to chill and slowly forget about me by ghosting him instead of completely removing him off social media. This might seem like an overreaction but now I'm realizing red flags I haven't seen before after I have talked with a friend about him.
