M
maxismisha
Iron
- Joined
- Jun 25, 2025
- Posts
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By: The Guy Who Got Hot Accidentally Once
Step 1: Jawline Activation Protocol
Chew aluminum foil twice a day.
It sends micro-shocks to your masseter muscles and makes your jaw buzz with alpha energy. Bonus: people will avoid you because they think you’re unwell — this creates scarcity, which raises your SMV.
🌬 Step 2: Advanced Mewing (Mew+++)
Forget tongue posture — I tape my entire face to the ceiling fan and spin at 600 RPM.
This creates centrifugal facial pressure and boosts my canthal tilt by at least 4 degrees per week.
Warning: may cause orbital displacement. But that’s Chadcore now.
Step 3: Skincare with Grit
Use engine degreaser as exfoliant. Follow with olive oil and Red Bull as a moisturizer.
If it burns, that means it’s working. If you pass out, you’re detoxing.
🛏 Step 4: Sleepmaxxing
Sleep on a pile of old textbooks — increases IQ through osmosis while compressing facial fat pads.
Optional: place raw liver under your pillow to absorb ancestral masculinity.
Step 5: Brainmaxxing for Face Gains
Say “mew” 1,000 times a day. Out loud.
This triggers subconscious facial contractions and aligns your soul with the golden ratio.
🕶 Step 6: Glancemaxxing
Practice seduction stares by locking eyes with your own reflection until one of you blinks.
If you win, your eyes become hunter. If you lose, keep practicing. If your mirror wins twice, move out — it’s haunted.
Step 7: Natty Facial Enhancements
No surgery. I just got stung by wasps until my cheekbones looked high enough.
Swelling = volume. It’s basically free filler if you can handle the pain of natural beauty.
Bonus: Wolfmaxxing
Howl at the moon 3 nights a week.
It does nothing for your looks but builds confidence and keeps neighbors away, maintaining your mysterious lone-alpha status.
Final Thoughts
If you’re not actively reshaping your skull, absorbing lunar energy, and chewing hardware materials, are you even trying?
The grind never stops. Stay ugly. Stay improving.
#HardMew #ChinDom #Lookschizo #NattyImplants
Step 1: Jawline Activation ProtocolChew aluminum foil twice a day.
It sends micro-shocks to your masseter muscles and makes your jaw buzz with alpha energy. Bonus: people will avoid you because they think you’re unwell — this creates scarcity, which raises your SMV.
🌬 Step 2: Advanced Mewing (Mew+++)
Forget tongue posture — I tape my entire face to the ceiling fan and spin at 600 RPM.
This creates centrifugal facial pressure and boosts my canthal tilt by at least 4 degrees per week.
Warning: may cause orbital displacement. But that’s Chadcore now.
Step 3: Skincare with GritUse engine degreaser as exfoliant. Follow with olive oil and Red Bull as a moisturizer.
If it burns, that means it’s working. If you pass out, you’re detoxing.
🛏 Step 4: Sleepmaxxing
Sleep on a pile of old textbooks — increases IQ through osmosis while compressing facial fat pads.
Optional: place raw liver under your pillow to absorb ancestral masculinity.
Step 5: Brainmaxxing for Face GainsSay “mew” 1,000 times a day. Out loud.
This triggers subconscious facial contractions and aligns your soul with the golden ratio.
🕶 Step 6: Glancemaxxing
Practice seduction stares by locking eyes with your own reflection until one of you blinks.
If you win, your eyes become hunter. If you lose, keep practicing. If your mirror wins twice, move out — it’s haunted.
Step 7: Natty Facial EnhancementsNo surgery. I just got stung by wasps until my cheekbones looked high enough.
Swelling = volume. It’s basically free filler if you can handle the pain of natural beauty.
Bonus: WolfmaxxingHowl at the moon 3 nights a week.
It does nothing for your looks but builds confidence and keeps neighbors away, maintaining your mysterious lone-alpha status.
Final ThoughtsIf you’re not actively reshaping your skull, absorbing lunar energy, and chewing hardware materials, are you even trying?
The grind never stops. Stay ugly. Stay improving.
#HardMew #ChinDom #Lookschizo #NattyImplants
