Want to become social.

[BrettyBoy]

How do I become social in real life? I’m unsocial and not by choice and I’m only social with certain people but want to be generally social and it’s ruining my life. Maybe someone who was in that same boat as me but managed to get out of it could offer advice?

 

[Vitruvian]

get a roomate

 

[ChoSeungHui]

No social skills for ur face

 

[FailedNormie]

How old are you?

 

[Zero]

No social skills for ur face

Uhm, my friend is a really sweet guy and he has a wonderful girlfriend, whom he is lucky to have. He is friendly, bubbly and enthusiastic thanks to his social skills, but you wouldn't know. Above all, he's very considerate of his partner-in-crime. She's asexual, but lesbian on Tuesdays. He's doing a wonderful job in supporting her in her fight against anti-LGBTTQQIAAP sentiments. If you have social skills like he had, a real man, you wouldn't be an inkel. Sorry, not sorry, racist bigot.

 

[Balkancel]

Just be outgoing bro

 

[rockndogs]

Just be yourself bro

Find some hobbies bro

 

[BrettyBoy]

Be serious here please. I feel like roping because of this issue.

How old are you?

26.

get a roomate

No real life friends.

 

[AspiringChad]

Be serious here please. I feel like roping because of this issue.

26.

No real life friends.

Go outside
Talk to people in social places
Literally tell them let’s b friends

 

[BrettyBoy]

Go outside
Talk to people in social places
Literally tell them let’s b friends

I guess I can try. I don’t know if I can do it though.

 

[HardMewer]

Be serious here please. I feel like roping because of this issue.

26.

No real life friends.

Start doing some sport or join a club that you are interested in.Personally I would recommend joining the gym as well,its easy to talk to people there and it has become a social club of sorts.
If you are working or in college try to talk to more people and settle down with a group that you think have some similarities with you but also that are better than you in certain aspects to challenge you.Try NoFap,it helps with social anxiety for a lot of people and allows you to be more outgoing.Oh yeah and don't spend too much time obsessing about your looks on this website and spend less time on the internet.t

 

[BrettyBoy]

Start doing some sport or join a club that you are interested in.Personally I would recommend joining the gym as well,its easy to talk to people there and it has become a social club of sorts.
If you are working or in college try to talk to more people and settle down with a group that you think have some similarities with you but also that are better than you in certain aspects to challenge you.Try NoFap,it helps with social anxiety for a lot of people and allows you to be more outgoing.Oh yeah and don't spend too much time obsessing about your looks on this website and spend less time on the internet.t

Gym isn’t my cup of tea and most sports I’m not interested in.

 

[AspiringChad]

I guess I can try. I don’t know if I can do it though.

Get out the house now

 

[BrettyBoy]

Get out the house now

It’s 2am

 

[AspiringChad]

It’s 2am

Tmr morning then

 

[HardMewer]

Gym isn’t my cup of tea and most sports I’m not interested in.

Trust me, going to the gym is great.If you don't like it now,you will like it after going there for a few months.Why isn't it your cup of tea?Surely there is also something else you are interested in though.

 

[BrettyBoy]

Tmr morning then

I see.

Trust me, going to the gym is great.If you don't like it now,you will like it after going there for a few months.Why isn't it your cup of tea?Surely there is also something else you are interested in though.

Video games, smoking and getting drunk.

 

[HardMewer]

I see.

Video games, smoking and getting drunk.

Yeah cut down on the video games.I used to be addicted to video games myself and i could not operate properly in a social environment because I was playing 24/7.Are you getting drunk with friends or just on your own?

 

[BrettyBoy]

Yeah cut down on the video games.I used to be addicted to video games myself and i could not operate properly in a social environment because I was playing 24/7.Are you getting drunk with friends or just on your own?

Alone.

 

[HardMewer]

Seriously you shouldn't be drinking at all alone, that's what alcoholics do.Join your local gym whether you like it or not,cut down on the video games,stop drinking alone and only drink on nights out.If you get rid of most of your shitty habits, your social habits will also re-adjust.

Alone.

I don't know what you look like but by the sounds of it,most of your problems are mental.

 

[BrettyBoy]

Seriously you shouldn't be drinking at all alone, that's what alcoholics do.Join your local gym whether you like it or not,cut down on the video games,stop drinking alone and only drink on nights out.If you get rid of most of your shitty habits, your social habits will also re-adjust.

I don't know what you look like but by the sounds of it,most of your problems are mental.

I’d rather not do something that I don’t enjoy.

 

[CupOfCoffee]

You can't become something you're not. Don't bother trying

 

[BrettyBoy]

You can't become something you're not. Don't bother trying

Some people manage to fix that type of shit I think.

 

[HardMewer]

I’d rather not do something that I don’t enjoy.

Have you been to the gym before and how long?

 

[BrettyBoy]

Have you been to the gym before and how long?

A few times. Forgot the exact time, like maybe 40 minutes or something. Me and other students from an autistic school I use to go to were took to a gym.

 

[CupOfCoffee]

Some people manage to fix that type of shit I think.

No. Social people are social because they want to socialize and have high social calibration and a lifetime of skills from doing it. If you're a loner it's just not going to happen, if you have to force it or "become" social then it's not coming naturally and is bound to fail. I'm speaking from personal experience btw, I used to try to talk to new people everyday, call my acquaintances regularly, go to club meetings etc. but the problem was trying too hard. Now I have couple friends, but I met them by literally doing nothing but be my boring self and say whatever came to mind. Im not even interested in a large social group or anything, not even worried about losing contact with the people i currently talk to. Basically dont give a shit about anything and you'll likely do better than if you try. Good luck.

 

[BrettyBoy]

No. Social people are social because they want to socialize and have high social calibration and a lifetime of skills from doing it. If you're a loner it's just not going to happen, if you have to force it or "become" social then it's not coming naturally and is bound to fail. I'm speaking from personal experience btw, I used to try to talk to new people everyday, call my acquaintances regularly, go to club meetings etc. but the problem was trying too hard. Now I have couple friends, but I met them by literally doing nothing but be my boring self and say whatever came to mind. Im not even interested in a large social group or anything, not even worried about losing contact with the people i currently talk to. Basically dont give a shit about anything and you'll likely do better than if you try. Good luck.

Thanks, man.

 

[HardMewer]

A few times. Forgot the exact time, like maybe 40 minutes or something. Me and other students from an autistic school I use to go to were took to a gym.

You probably don't like going there because you are out of your comfort zone.If you want to feel better about yourself in the long term you will have to get out of your comfort zone.I don't care if you don't like the gym,force yourself to go for a few months at least since there is nothing else you are interested in apparently.

No. Social people are social because they want to socialize and have high social calibration and a lifetime of skills from doing it. If you're a loner it's just not going to happen, if you have to force it or "become" social then it's not coming naturally and is bound to fail. I'm speaking from personal experience btw, I used to try to talk to new people everyday, call my acquaintances regularly, go to club meetings etc. but the problem was trying too hard. Now I have couple friends, but I met them by literally doing nothing but be my boring self and say whatever came to mind. Im not even interested in a large social group or anything, not even worried about losing contact with the people i currently talk to. Basically dont give a shit about anything and you'll likely do better than if you try. Good luck.

While a lot of that is true,I still think that it is better to force yourself to talk to more people.It's the best way to develop your social skills.It takes a while but its better than not being socially adjusted.

 

[BrettyBoy]

You probably don't like going there because you are out of your comfort zone.If you want to feel better about yourself in the long term you will have to get out of your comfort zone.I don't care if you don't like the gym,force yourself to go for a few months at least since there is nothing else you are interested in apparently.

While a lot of that is true,I still think that it is better to force yourself to talk to more people.It's the best way to develop your social skills.It takes a while but its better than not being socially adjusted.

Doing things I don’t enjoy won’t help with my emotional problems. I’m just gonna try and look for other ways to socialise with people. Being out of my comfort zone isn’t the reason for not enjoying the gym, I generally just don’t enjoy it.

 

[HardMewer]

Doing things I don’t enjoy won’t help with my emotional problems. I’m just gonna try and look for other ways to socialise with people.

Just cut your shit habits and do something productive to replace it.Don't spend your life rotting away.Working out makes you more emotionally stable so I don't see how that's a problem.

 

[BrettyBoy]

Just cut your shit habits and do something productive to replace it.Don't spend your life rotting away.Working out makes you more emotionally stable so I don't see how that's a problem.

Meeting people at bars is more for me.

 

[Insomniac]

Maybe Dr. @Ritalincel can prescribe you with something..

 

[BrettyBoy]

Maybe Dr. @Ritalincel can prescribe you with something..

Hope so. XD