Want to roid but don’t want to break my mothers heart

Celt

Celt

Iron
Joined
Sep 1, 2026
Posts
66
Reputation
47
I’m almost 21 now, so I wouldn’t be doing it for muh bones or height or whatever. I just love gymcelling and don’t particularly intend on a long life and I want to be freakishly huge and aesthetic

Unlike a lot of the kids here it isn’t a matter of “getting caught”, I’m a grown man and live away for uni. But my parents are smart, they know me well and I wouldn’t intend on running small amounts to say the least

My mother is pretty old, not particularly healthy and I probably don’t have all that long left with her in the grand scheme of things. And the truth is she’s the only person that has ever truly loved me, and unconditionally so.

My father has always been rather cold and critical, my friendships shallow and disloyal and I’ve never had a proper relationship (and everything I’ve had has gone to shit).

But she (rightfully) worries for me quite deeply even without any roids involved. She found my indiamart modafinil hoard once and needless to say it scared her a lot for me, but she went and got me a proper adhd evaluation and didn’t confiscate them when I explained why I needed them

My parents like my interest in fitness (I grew up a fat chud) but quite regularly warn me about steroids. They’re ignorant as normies are but they aren’t wrong in that, with the person I am, I would objectively shorten my life with them and they probably wouldn’t do my fragile mental health a lot of good lol. I myself know the pharmacology and the risks inside out but anything I say would not reasonably reassure them and they’d know straight away if I came back 30lbs bigger one day.

It burdens me because I want to live my life uninhibited, to follow my dreams, but this would literally break her heart. Maybe even put her under enough stress to worsen her health which I couldn’t forgive myself for. If she died I would hop on grams of the stuff, I have little fear for my own mortality or what anyone else thinks. But I don’t think I can do it to her

Anyone else relate?
 
  • +1
Reactions: Yoshiteeq, Peubert, LiL 369 and 2 others
You gotta stop caring about this shit dude you're almost 21
 
  • +1
Reactions: R0T
Useless at 21, your bones are fused
 
You gotta stop caring about this shit dude you're almost 21
“Don’t have empathy for the only person who has ever (potentially will ever) love you because you’re 21”

This isn’t fear or anything its a moral thing at this point
 
  • +1
Reactions: Yoshiteeq
Useless at 21, your bones are fused
Retard read the first sentence
I do NOT care about muh bone growth
I’m 6’3” with a decent skull
I want to gymcel and be gigantic
 
Retard read the first sentence
I do NOT care about muh bone growth
I’m 6’3” with a decent skull
I want to gymcel and be gigantic
We both know, also roiding is for retards regarding muscle growth. Terrible ROI
 
We both know, also roiding is for retards regarding muscle growth. Terrible ROI
.. roiding is for retards *regarding muscle growth*?

the only thing that will give you massively superphysiological muscle growth is *cope*? (other than maybe myostatin deletion but that may as well be scifi for now)

if you’re yapping about smv idgaf
i’m attractive enough to get attention im just autistic as shit
if love happens it happens but i’m not even “looksmaxxing” any more this is for me
 
  • +1
Reactions: weex300 and dreamz
“Don’t have empathy for the only person who has ever (potentially will ever) love you because you’re 21”

This isn’t fear or anything its a moral thing at this point
It's your life. You know I'm right.
 
  • +1
Reactions: R0T and Celt
I’m almost 21 now, so I wouldn’t be doing it for muh bones or height or whatever. I just love gymcelling and don’t particularly intend on a long life and I want to be freakishly huge and aesthetic

Unlike a lot of the kids here it isn’t a matter of “getting caught”, I’m a grown man and live away for uni. But my parents are smart, they know me well and I wouldn’t intend on running small amounts to say the least

My mother is pretty old, not particularly healthy and I probably don’t have all that long left with her in the grand scheme of things. And the truth is she’s the only person that has ever truly loved me, and unconditionally so.

My father has always been rather cold and critical, my friendships shallow and disloyal and I’ve never had a proper relationship (and everything I’ve had has gone to shit).

But she (rightfully) worries for me quite deeply even without any roids involved. She found my indiamart modafinil hoard once and needless to say it scared her a lot for me, but she went and got me a proper adhd evaluation and didn’t confiscate them when I explained why I needed them

My parents like my interest in fitness (I grew up a fat chud) but quite regularly warn me about steroids. They’re ignorant as normies are but they aren’t wrong in that, with the person I am, I would objectively shorten my life with them and they probably wouldn’t do my fragile mental health a lot of good lol. I myself know the pharmacology and the risks inside out but anything I say would not reasonably reassure them and they’d know straight away if I came back 30lbs bigger one day.

It burdens me because I want to live my life uninhibited, to follow my dreams, but this would literally break her heart. Maybe even put her under enough stress to worsen her health which I couldn’t forgive myself for. If she died I would hop on grams of the stuff, I have little fear for my own mortality or what anyone else thinks. But I don’t think I can do it to her

Anyone else relate?
y
 
Last edited:
It's your life. You know I'm right.
you haven’t provided me with a personal experience or an argument you’ve just arbitrarily told me to disregard her because i’ve been alive for too many years not to

like the purpose of this thread was to get perspectives from people that have done so or have similar thoughts
 
  • +1
Reactions: minty
Bro I mean you come first if its gonna make you better just do it
 
  • +1
Reactions: Celt
My mother is pretty old, not particularly healthy and I probably don’t have all that long left with her in the grand scheme of things. And the truth is she’s the only person that has ever truly loved me, and unconditionally so.
If she loved you that much she wouldve let yoi slay her instead of friendzonint
 
  • Ugh..
Reactions: Celt
be careful how you talk with people you piece of shit
I just don’t bother interacting with people like that on here
I know there’s a small subset of people (mainly oldcels) on this forum who are genuinelly insane trucel porn addicts who just ejaculate the most vile shit all over the forum every day for some reason
Just ignore low quality users instead of feeding them
 
  • +1
Reactions: weex300
I just don’t bother interacting with people like that on here
I know there’s a small subset of people (mainly oldcels) on this forum who are genuinelly insane trucel porn addicts who just ejaculate the most vile shit all over the forum every day for some reason
Just ignore low quality users instead of feeding them
Yeah bro I can already tell you are doing better in life than those type of people
 
  • Love it
Reactions: Celt
Bro I mean you come first if its gonna make you better just do it
I mean thats the problem
Hurting my mum and having my whole family worried about me would hurt me deeply.

And being on roids (especially 19nors) and then having my mother die in a way that could have been contributed to by the stress i put on her would probably send me into psychosis or some shit
But also being able to roid would improve my life in a multitude of ways. I would feel better about myself, more confident, lower inhib, more attention, better treatment, maybe even social media fame if I wanted

I guess it’s always there. The mesorx unc types insist on nobody roiding before 25, low iq obviously but a lot of dudes with great physiques start late ig.

My opinions on this shit fluctuate rapidly there was a point a few weeks ago where I was basically a click away from starting a blast
 
If she loved you that much she wouldve let yoi slay her instead of friendzonint
IMG 6810
 
I just don’t bother interacting with people like that on here
I know there’s a small subset of people (mainly oldcels) on this forum who are genuinelly insane trucel porn addicts who just ejaculate the most vile shit all over the forum every day for some reason
Just ignore low quality users instead of feeding them
for real

there's a bunch of retards in this forum, I can't even understand why because this forum was about self improvement and shit but there's retards posting roblox porn in here
 
  • +1
Reactions: Celt
you dont want to roid

people who actually want to roid they start early at 14 years old, so did I and so did everyone who actually has a desire to roid

If you wanted to roid, you would already be doing it, trust me on that.
 
  • +1
Reactions: weex300
I mean thats the problem
Hurting my mum and having my whole family worried about me would hurt me deeply.

And being on roids (especially 19nors) and then having my mother die in a way that could have been contributed to by the stress i put on her would probably send me into psychosis or some shit
But also being able to roid would improve my life in a multitude of ways. I would feel better about myself, more confident, lower inhib, more attention, better treatment, maybe even social media fame if I wanted

I guess it’s always there. The mesorx unc types insist on nobody roiding before 25, low iq obviously but a lot of dudes with great physiques start late ig.

My opinions on this shit fluctuate rapidly there was a point a few weeks ago where I was basically a click away from starting a blast
Bro If you don’t visit her often just blast and when you plan to visit her just lower the dose or quit it then hop on again but that wouldn’t be good ig. Can you not just larp that you are natty? And yeah I also don’t like mesorx uncs they are just gymcels and think body is only what matters
 
  • +1
Reactions: Celt
for real

there's a bunch of retards in this forum, I can't even understand why because this forum was about self improvement and shit but there's retards posting roblox porn in here
is ragingmanlet back or has he passed the torch to NEW roblox porn fiends

it’s pretty insane but makes sense especially in offtopic when you consider this place takes its userbase from a weird combination of incel forums, imageboards and tiktokcels
 
Bro If you don’t visit her often just blast and when you plan to visit her just lower the dose or quit it then hop on again but that wouldn’t be good ig. Can you not just larp that you are natty? And yeah I also don’t like mesorx uncs they are just gymcels and think body is only what matters
if i want to run grams i can’t really larp natty, i see my family every couple months at least and often for weeks at a time at christmas and in the summer

my parents are smart and they’ll know for sure if i’m suddenly huge and lean
 
  • +1
Reactions: dreamz
I mean thats the problem
Hurting my mum and having my whole family worried about me would hurt me deeply.

And being on roids (especially 19nors) and then having my mother die in a way that could have been contributed to by the stress i put on her would probably send me into psychosis or some shit
But also being able to roid would improve my life in a multitude of ways. I would feel better about myself, more confident, lower inhib, more attention, better treatment, maybe even social media fame if I wanted

I guess it’s always there. The mesorx unc types insist on nobody roiding before 25, low iq obviously but a lot of dudes with great physiques start late ig.

My opinions on this shit fluctuate rapidly there was a point a few weeks ago where I was basically a click away from starting a blast
the choice you have to make here is deciding between your mother's happiness and wellbeing, and then your own urges towards wanting to pursue a version of yourself you see as better. Family comes first, you should do what you think is the right decision.
 
is ragingmanlet back or has he passed the torch to NEW roblox porn fiends

it’s pretty insane but makes sense especially in offtopic when you consider this place takes its userbase from a weird combination of incel forums, imageboards and tiktokcels
him and people who glaze him, and some retards admitting they masturbate to Roblox porn (no one needs to know that lol)

this place should've been better but I guess that this bunch of retards started flooding in when clavicular and K Shami told everyone this place existed, like brad aniston said this place was supposed to be niche
 
you dont want to roid

people who actually want to roid they start early at 14 years old, so did I and so did everyone who actually has a desire to roid

If you wanted to roid, you would already be doing it, trust me on that.
i was a sheltered fat autist i was rotting on imageboards back then

didn’t even start in the gym until 18 but became obsessed with it
i feel like i sort of gained sentience at about 17 if that makes sense. that’s about when my life started going to shit but also when i realised it also was, in fact, shit

i admire the level of awareness a lot of these kids have at that age
 
  • +1
Reactions: sonic55555
if i want to run grams i can’t really larp natty, i see my family every couple months at least and often for weeks at a time at christmas and in the summer

my parents are smart and they’ll know for sure if i’m suddenly huge and lean
bro sincerely just don't even roid

if your parents are this strict it's not even worth doing it or else you'll end up hurting your mother's feelings

even tho I disagree with your mother's line of thought it's just better to not do it
 
bro sincerely just don't even roid

if your parents are this strict it's not even worth doing it or else you'll end up hurting your mother's feelings

even tho I disagree with your mother's line of thought it's just better to not do it
if someone wants to roid you cant stop them

but OP doesnt want to roid
 
  • +1
Reactions: weex300
if someone wants to roid you cant stop them

but OP doesnt want to roid
I agree

and I said this because I think OP doesn't want it that bad

if he really wanted it he would do it regardless of what people think
 
  • +1
Reactions: sonic55555
I agree

and I said this because I think OP doesn't want it that bad

if he really wanted it he would do it regardless of what people think
yes, you really really have to want it bad if ur gonna roid. people dont know how shit roids makes you feel... and then theres the side effects ontop
 
  • +1
Reactions: weex300
if i want to run grams i can’t really larp natty, i see my family every couple months at least and often for weeks at a time at christmas and in the summer

my parents are smart and they’ll know for sure if i’m suddenly huge and lean
I have a question are you thinking of getting married? you mentioned you didn’t want a long life?
 
yes, you really really have to want it bad if ur gonna roid. people dont know how shit roids makes you feel... and then theres the side effects ontop
brae is a good example of what roid does to an person
 
  • +1
Reactions: Celt
bro sincerely just don't even roid

if your parents are this strict it's not even worth doing it or else you'll end up hurting your mother's feelings

even tho I disagree with your mother's line of thought it's just better to not do it
its not strictness because its not about them stopping me or cutting contact

i’ve just not exactly been all that mentally well and she worries for me a lot. with all due respect in a lot of the cases of guys i see here who blast as teens, the parents are clearly neglectful/abusive/low iq for this to be a consideration
 
just do it, if u dont, u'll regret
 
its not strictness because its not about them stopping me or cutting contact

i’ve just not exactly been all that mentally well and she worries for me a lot. with all due respect in a lot of the cases of guys i see here who blast as teens, the parents are clearly neglectful/abusive/low iq for this to be a consideration
well if you're not mentally good to start with it's gonna make things even worse

brae started roiding and got facial implants and a genioplasty (he didn't even look bad to begin with)
 
  • +1
Reactions: Celt
yes, you really really have to want it bad if ur gonna roid. people dont know how shit roids makes you feel... and then theres the side effects ontop
I know the pharmacology very well tbh I’m no amateur, I’ve been researching for like a year

I’m not exactly a stranger to feeling like shit. I basically starved myself from 100kg to 60kg, I abused stupid amounts of stims and stayed awake for days at a time to the point that i was pretty much psychotic for like a month to pass my exams because i fucked up and ldared for most of my first year.

It’s not about me. I don’t care about feeling shit or dying young, its about breaking the heart of the one person that has ever been there for me ig

Idk man maybe I can soft launch the concept. But the truth is she wouldn’t be wrong to worry. I have a very addictive personality and I’m very self destructive. And most of the men in my family including grandfathers on both sides died in their 40s of heart attacks.
 
well if you're not mentally good to start with it's gonna make things even worse

brae started roiding and got facial implants and a genioplasty (he didn't even look bad to begin with)
yeah but i feel like roids might counterintuitively do me some good

i’m super high inhib. which in turn makes me paranoid, depressive, anxious etc. if it could fix that (both mechanistically and indirectly through the fact that life is just easier if you’re huge and intimidating) then maybe I’d be better off
 
My mother is pretty old, not particularly healthy and I probably don’t have all that long left with her in the grand scheme of things. And the truth is she’s the only person that has ever truly loved me, and unconditionally so.

But she (rightfully) worries for me quite deeply even without any roids involved.
Why make your mother stressed over something you can control? Does your need to roid outweigh your mother’s happiness?
 
I’m almost 21 now, so I wouldn’t be doing it for muh bones or height or whatever. I just love gymcelling and don’t particularly intend on a long life and I want to be freakishly huge and aesthetic

Unlike a lot of the kids here it isn’t a matter of “getting caught”, I’m a grown man and live away for uni. But my parents are smart, they know me well and I wouldn’t intend on running small amounts to say the least

My mother is pretty old, not particularly healthy and I probably don’t have all that long left with her in the grand scheme of things. And the truth is she’s the only person that has ever truly loved me, and unconditionally so.

My father has always been rather cold and critical, my friendships shallow and disloyal and I’ve never had a proper relationship (and everything I’ve had has gone to shit).

But she (rightfully) worries for me quite deeply even without any roids involved. She found my indiamart modafinil hoard once and needless to say it scared her a lot for me, but she went and got me a proper adhd evaluation and didn’t confiscate them when I explained why I needed them

My parents like my interest in fitness (I grew up a fat chud) but quite regularly warn me about steroids. They’re ignorant as normies are but they aren’t wrong in that, with the person I am, I would objectively shorten my life with them and they probably wouldn’t do my fragile mental health a lot of good lol. I myself know the pharmacology and the risks inside out but anything I say would not reasonably reassure them and they’d know straight away if I came back 30lbs bigger one day.

It burdens me because I want to live my life uninhibited, to follow my dreams, but this would literally break her heart. Maybe even put her under enough stress to worsen her health which I couldn’t forgive myself for. If she died I would hop on grams of the stuff, I have little fear for my own mortality or what anyone else thinks. But I don’t think I can do it to her

Anyone else relate?
Me:(
 
  • +1
Reactions: Celt
I’m almost 21 now, so I wouldn’t be doing it for muh bones or height or whatever. I just love gymcelling and don’t particularly intend on a long life and I want to be freakishly huge and aesthetic

Unlike a lot of the kids here it isn’t a matter of “getting caught”, I’m a grown man and live away for uni. But my parents are smart, they know me well and I wouldn’t intend on running small amounts to say the least

My mother is pretty old, not particularly healthy and I probably don’t have all that long left with her in the grand scheme of things. And the truth is she’s the only person that has ever truly loved me, and unconditionally so.

My father has always been rather cold and critical, my friendships shallow and disloyal and I’ve never had a proper relationship (and everything I’ve had has gone to shit).

But she (rightfully) worries for me quite deeply even without any roids involved. She found my indiamart modafinil hoard once and needless to say it scared her a lot for me, but she went and got me a proper adhd evaluation and didn’t confiscate them when I explained why I needed them

My parents like my interest in fitness (I grew up a fat chud) but quite regularly warn me about steroids. They’re ignorant as normies are but they aren’t wrong in that, with the person I am, I would objectively shorten my life with them and they probably wouldn’t do my fragile mental health a lot of good lol. I myself know the pharmacology and the risks inside out but anything I say would not reasonably reassure them and they’d know straight away if I came back 30lbs bigger one day.

It burdens me because I want to live my life uninhibited, to follow my dreams, but this would literally break her heart. Maybe even put her under enough stress to worsen her health which I couldn’t forgive myself for. If she died I would hop on grams of the stuff, I have little fear for my own mortality or what anyone else thinks. But I don’t think I can do it to her

Anyone else relate?
Bro
 

Similar threads

EyeHateGod
Replies
3
Views
26
hateg
hateg
3
Replies
3
Views
41
weex300
weex300
Klasik616
Replies
7
Views
42
Klasik616
Klasik616
trvechud
Replies
12
Views
63
CheezyPoof
CheezyPoof

Users who are viewing this thread

  • .dark
  • Celt
  • khhvdemon
  • Ninjakeynes
Back
Top