muslincel
Iron
- Joined
- Feb 27, 2026
- Posts
- 2
- Reputation
- 2
Ayatollah Sadeq Larejani
Looks
1) Lazy eye
The most glaring issue is his very prominent lazy eye; someone with a lazy eye would never be taken seriously overseas and they'd clown him for looking inbred
2) Heightmogged
When standing next to the former supreme leader, who is 179cm (5'10), he would stand around 5'8, which would make him shorter than a large portion of the islamic revolutionary guards, causing way too many heightmoggings to be taken seriously
Status
1) Non-Sayyid
He gets brutally statusmogged due to not being a Sayyid (descendant of Prophet Muhammads household), which would cost him legitimacy in the Arab world for being a purely native Persian, his Arabic is also bad which would be hugely embarrassing to Shia Islam because they're always criticized for being to Persianate, causing all of Shia Islam to be brutally Arabmogged for the next 2-3 decades
2) Military ranking
He is well respected in the IRGC and extended military, as the Larijani family are total OGs in the Iranian military, and has many high ranking family members there
3) Islammogged
He is one of the higher-ranking clerics (Ayatollah), and while not being a Grand Ayatollah, he is very well-respected in Islamic seminaries, and his views are generally considered authentic
Hojjatollah Mojtaba Khamenei
Looks
1) Brown
First of all he is totally brownmaxxed meaning he will redact all the Aryanmoggings Khamenei Sr. accumulated for being an uberwhite gigachad
2) Weird nose
Secondly, he has a very weird looking nose, which has weird bumps all over and is not at all perfectly symmetrical and aquiline like that of Khamenei Sr.
Status
1) Non-Ayatollah
He is not a qualified islamic Jurist like most of his peers, meaning he'd have bad standing in terms of Islamic authority
Ayatollah Mohammad Mirbagheri
Looks
1) Facial symmetry
Ok so I think this guy has overall the best facial symmetry of any candidate, if you look at some YouTube videos of his, he is very handsome overall face-wise:
2) Brown
He is however, very clearly also the brownest candidate of all, which would cause aforementioned issues
3) Framemogged
He has pretty narrow shoulders, and overall bad frame
4) Heightmogged
He is overall the shortest candidate, this becomes apparent in any photos where he is with literally any other person, he appears to be roughly 172cm (5'6)
Status
1) Arabmogged
One of my biggest discrepancies with him is his totally god-awful Arabic, one of the few reasons why Khamenei had international legitimacy, is because he was one of the few natively Persian Shi'a clerics that spoke actually decent, natural-sounding Arabic, which is the exact opposite for Mirbagheri:
Hojjatollah Hassan Khomeini
Looks
1) Whitemogging
Overall he is clearly the whitest candidate, white skin, blue eyes, even some strands of blonde hair
2) Beardcel
This is one of his most prominent defects, his beard is totally patchy at the sides and pools in at the chin, often it also poofs out, giving him an unkempt scrappy look
3) Eyes
He has very expressive eyes that make him look very likable and charismatic
4) Obesitymaxxing
In the last 10 years or so he gained a bit of weight that make him look way too prominent and commanding to be in a spiritual position
Status
1) Non-Ayatollah
Even though he is the grandson of Khomeini, like his peer Mojtaba Khamenei, he is not a qualified Jurist, and therefore would not have any Islamic authority
2) Arabmogged
His Arabic just sucks, it's goddamn awful:
abowlGHOWWSem mohAMMAD! VVVa aloOWW Ahlebaytihi TOWWWhirin!
Hojjatollah Hossein Ejei
Looks
1) Chadlite?
Is it just me or does he kinda look like a Chadlite at certain angles? I looked up some photos of him when he was younger and he totally mogged, not even exaggerating: https://static.prod.iranwire.com/fi...0b04effcedf/moslehi-ejei-early-photograph.jpg
2) Zagros nose
Ok so lets begin addressing the elephant in the room before it pokes my goddamn eyes out: he has a massive zagros mountain shnoz, which would totally discredit him via racist caricatures like charlie hebdo
Status
1) Ayatollahmogged
To my surprise, even though he heads the current interim government, he is not an Ayatollah and not associated with any prominent families, as well as a non-Sayyid, meaning he would be totally unqualified, his overall influence is the only thing keeping him at the higher-ups
Ayatollah Reza Arafi
Looks
1) Symmetry
Overall decent symmetry, but is thrown off by too prominent nostrils and forehead
2) Brown
So he is probably tied with Mojtaba for least brown of the browns, but he is still pretty brown, so there's that
3) No aura or Noor
Is it just me or does this guy just have no aura or noor? I literally feel nothing when looking at him, he's just like Naim Qassim in that he just has no presence:
Status
1) Non-Sayyid
Another guy that's not a Sayyid? I mean, come on, this is just Naim Qassim all over again. Imagine the humiliation that Persians will feel towards the Arabs when their leader is not a Sayyid. They will be made endlessly fun of
Ayatollah Mohsen Araki
Ok so the threadmaking thing wont let me unformat here, so let me just summarize:
He has a big nose, but his seth rogen like appearance is kinda soothing, he is also the only one of these guy where I feel like he has some noor or aura, he is a qualified jurist aka ayatollah and speaks perfect arabic, even better than khamenei:
Looks
1) Lazy eye
The most glaring issue is his very prominent lazy eye; someone with a lazy eye would never be taken seriously overseas and they'd clown him for looking inbred
2) Heightmogged
When standing next to the former supreme leader, who is 179cm (5'10), he would stand around 5'8, which would make him shorter than a large portion of the islamic revolutionary guards, causing way too many heightmoggings to be taken seriously
Status
1) Non-Sayyid
He gets brutally statusmogged due to not being a Sayyid (descendant of Prophet Muhammads household), which would cost him legitimacy in the Arab world for being a purely native Persian, his Arabic is also bad which would be hugely embarrassing to Shia Islam because they're always criticized for being to Persianate, causing all of Shia Islam to be brutally Arabmogged for the next 2-3 decades
2) Military ranking
He is well respected in the IRGC and extended military, as the Larijani family are total OGs in the Iranian military, and has many high ranking family members there
3) Islammogged
He is one of the higher-ranking clerics (Ayatollah), and while not being a Grand Ayatollah, he is very well-respected in Islamic seminaries, and his views are generally considered authentic
Hojjatollah Mojtaba Khamenei
Looks
1) Brown
First of all he is totally brownmaxxed meaning he will redact all the Aryanmoggings Khamenei Sr. accumulated for being an uberwhite gigachad
2) Weird nose
Secondly, he has a very weird looking nose, which has weird bumps all over and is not at all perfectly symmetrical and aquiline like that of Khamenei Sr.
Status
1) Non-Ayatollah
He is not a qualified islamic Jurist like most of his peers, meaning he'd have bad standing in terms of Islamic authority
Ayatollah Mohammad Mirbagheri
Looks
1) Facial symmetry
Ok so I think this guy has overall the best facial symmetry of any candidate, if you look at some YouTube videos of his, he is very handsome overall face-wise:
2) Brown
He is however, very clearly also the brownest candidate of all, which would cause aforementioned issues
3) Framemogged
He has pretty narrow shoulders, and overall bad frame
4) Heightmogged
He is overall the shortest candidate, this becomes apparent in any photos where he is with literally any other person, he appears to be roughly 172cm (5'6)
Status
1) Arabmogged
One of my biggest discrepancies with him is his totally god-awful Arabic, one of the few reasons why Khamenei had international legitimacy, is because he was one of the few natively Persian Shi'a clerics that spoke actually decent, natural-sounding Arabic, which is the exact opposite for Mirbagheri:
Hojjatollah Hassan Khomeini
Looks
1) Whitemogging
Overall he is clearly the whitest candidate, white skin, blue eyes, even some strands of blonde hair
2) Beardcel
This is one of his most prominent defects, his beard is totally patchy at the sides and pools in at the chin, often it also poofs out, giving him an unkempt scrappy look
3) Eyes
He has very expressive eyes that make him look very likable and charismatic
4) Obesitymaxxing
In the last 10 years or so he gained a bit of weight that make him look way too prominent and commanding to be in a spiritual position
Status
1) Non-Ayatollah
Even though he is the grandson of Khomeini, like his peer Mojtaba Khamenei, he is not a qualified Jurist, and therefore would not have any Islamic authority
2) Arabmogged
His Arabic just sucks, it's goddamn awful:
abowlGHOWWSem mohAMMAD! VVVa aloOWW Ahlebaytihi TOWWWhirin!
Hojjatollah Hossein Ejei
Looks
1) Chadlite?
Is it just me or does he kinda look like a Chadlite at certain angles? I looked up some photos of him when he was younger and he totally mogged, not even exaggerating: https://static.prod.iranwire.com/fi...0b04effcedf/moslehi-ejei-early-photograph.jpg
2) Zagros nose
Ok so lets begin addressing the elephant in the room before it pokes my goddamn eyes out: he has a massive zagros mountain shnoz, which would totally discredit him via racist caricatures like charlie hebdo
Status
1) Ayatollahmogged
To my surprise, even though he heads the current interim government, he is not an Ayatollah and not associated with any prominent families, as well as a non-Sayyid, meaning he would be totally unqualified, his overall influence is the only thing keeping him at the higher-ups
Ayatollah Reza Arafi
Looks
1) Symmetry
Overall decent symmetry, but is thrown off by too prominent nostrils and forehead
2) Brown
So he is probably tied with Mojtaba for least brown of the browns, but he is still pretty brown, so there's that
3) No aura or Noor
Is it just me or does this guy just have no aura or noor? I literally feel nothing when looking at him, he's just like Naim Qassim in that he just has no presence:
Status
1) Non-Sayyid
Another guy that's not a Sayyid? I mean, come on, this is just Naim Qassim all over again. Imagine the humiliation that Persians will feel towards the Arabs when their leader is not a Sayyid. They will be made endlessly fun of
Ayatollah Mohsen Araki
Ok so the threadmaking thing wont let me unformat here, so let me just summarize:
He has a big nose, but his seth rogen like appearance is kinda soothing, he is also the only one of these guy where I feel like he has some noor or aura, he is a qualified jurist aka ayatollah and speaks perfect arabic, even better than khamenei:
