M
mojopin
It’s all fucking satire
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2018
- Posts
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So last summer I got a girls number who was my looksmatch and felt pretty proud that I could finally get with a normal girl. Oh how I was wrong.
The first date. I’m looking like a fresh mofo and then she turns up... accompanied by a hairy Arab in his midtwenties. It turns out it’s her adopted brother who gets jealous of boys in her life and is possessive of her and I was just sat there like wow, okay, what the fuck. I honestly felt like I was on a date with him because boy did he get involved ffs.
At that point she went from potential relationship to potential fuck and chuck. I met with her again except this time Bigfoot didn’t attend. All I did was kiss her because she wasn’t ready for anything else which was fine.
But here’s where it gets even more messed up. She then tries to proclaim that we’re boyfriend and girlfriend and messages me day and night about how I’m the love of her life, and that if she ever saw me win another girl she would cut her and then herself. So I realise I’m playing with fire and my mind was telling me to block her but my penis was telling me to pump and dump.
I gave her the smallest bit of hope over text and then she tells me her family are moving abroad and if I didn’t cancel my holiday to be with her there would be problems. All this time I’m telling her why the fuck would i do that and then she pulls the “I feel like you don’t love me anymore” card. Excuse me bitch, who said I ever loved you. Finally she told me that it will take her years to return to England and that she will wait for me.
Since then I’ve coasted through life ghosting her, just hoping she doesn’t pull a fatal attraction and try to kill me as I know full well she stalks my family.
As far as I know she’s in some foreign country waiting for me, living every moment for me like a twisted princess awaiting her prince.
The first date. I’m looking like a fresh mofo and then she turns up... accompanied by a hairy Arab in his midtwenties. It turns out it’s her adopted brother who gets jealous of boys in her life and is possessive of her and I was just sat there like wow, okay, what the fuck. I honestly felt like I was on a date with him because boy did he get involved ffs.
At that point she went from potential relationship to potential fuck and chuck. I met with her again except this time Bigfoot didn’t attend. All I did was kiss her because she wasn’t ready for anything else which was fine.
But here’s where it gets even more messed up. She then tries to proclaim that we’re boyfriend and girlfriend and messages me day and night about how I’m the love of her life, and that if she ever saw me win another girl she would cut her and then herself. So I realise I’m playing with fire and my mind was telling me to block her but my penis was telling me to pump and dump.
I gave her the smallest bit of hope over text and then she tells me her family are moving abroad and if I didn’t cancel my holiday to be with her there would be problems. All this time I’m telling her why the fuck would i do that and then she pulls the “I feel like you don’t love me anymore” card. Excuse me bitch, who said I ever loved you. Finally she told me that it will take her years to return to England and that she will wait for me.
Since then I’ve coasted through life ghosting her, just hoping she doesn’t pull a fatal attraction and try to kill me as I know full well she stalks my family.
As far as I know she’s in some foreign country waiting for me, living every moment for me like a twisted princess awaiting her prince.
?