optimisticzoomer
Salutations my children
- Joined
- May 24, 2020
- Posts
- 34,127
- Reputation
- 54,730
Caught my gf pooping so I broke up with her
She said she was off to pee while we were watching a movie and then she was gone five minutes and I knew something was up and knocked on the door and asked if everything was okay. She said yes but her voice was laboured so I became suspicious.
I yelled “I’m coming”. She screamed no but there was no stopping this so I smashed through the door and I saw her sitting on the toilet seat. I told her to get the fuck up but she didn't so I threw her off.
I looked inside the toilet and lo and behold just as I suspected a goddamn log. I told her you better pray this isn't yours. I looked around and saw no pet inside, so I said “I know this is your poop you hoe”. She screamed at me, told me I was crazy and threatened to call the police, all the while toilet paper in her hands.
I told her “no need to call the cops I’m breaking up with you as you some kind of poop hoe” and that was that.
I feel like a new man and i'm off to find a woman who doesn't poop
She said she was off to pee while we were watching a movie and then she was gone five minutes and I knew something was up and knocked on the door and asked if everything was okay. She said yes but her voice was laboured so I became suspicious.
I yelled “I’m coming”. She screamed no but there was no stopping this so I smashed through the door and I saw her sitting on the toilet seat. I told her to get the fuck up but she didn't so I threw her off.
I looked inside the toilet and lo and behold just as I suspected a goddamn log. I told her you better pray this isn't yours. I looked around and saw no pet inside, so I said “I know this is your poop you hoe”. She screamed at me, told me I was crazy and threatened to call the police, all the while toilet paper in her hands.
I told her “no need to call the cops I’m breaking up with you as you some kind of poop hoe” and that was that.
I feel like a new man and i'm off to find a woman who doesn't poop
Last edited:
