LKira
⋆｡‧₊°♱༺𓆩❦︎𓆪༻♱༉‧₊˚.
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2025
- Posts
- 952
- Reputation
- 898
As a high inhib undiagnosed autist with abused dog syndrome, I feel inclined to say sorry for polluting the forum with trash threads ever since I joined after discovering LM on IG reels.
When I was a grey, I posted as
imabadman02 (old AVI's below)
Most of my "content" on this forum is:
1. "Rate this Stacy" goonbait ¹ ² ³ ⁴ ⁵
(JFL at porn links on a site with JB's)¹ ² ³ ⁴
2. cringey fakecel emo vents ¹ ² ³ ⁴
3. ranting about Jews & Israel
"If I'm just a rotter acting on my self-sabotaging impulses, why am I here and not .is?"
A question no one asked, but this is a stream of thought for my personal needs. I feel like I really need to sit down and I think evaluate what I'm doing with my life rather than avoiding reality, so feel free to DNR, but for anyone who has ever hated seeing my replies, I hope you appreciate the mini self-evis above and I'll appreciate any advice anyone would like to free if they choose to do so.
I joined here with the goal in mind that I was going to turn my life around and "ascend" to become an ethereal True Alejandro brown e-boy as corny as that sounds, but I think the more I got blackpilled, the more I saw what I desired, the higher my ceiling became, the more stonecold and hopeless I became. I don't want to settle for nothing less than the best, but I'm too lucid to understand that isn't possible for me to be on the same level as other brownies like Cameron Alborzian and too aware of how many beautiful white Stacies like Anja Winkelmann are out there. I feel my fate is either:
Regardless if it's true if a boneless chubby cheeked 5'10.5 hypergamous zero dimo shitskin couldn't ever get a white HTB+'s love, I need to face the fact that staying on the doomer larp and throttling my mental health is ironically only making things much worse than they could be if I just stayed ignorant to the truth or put an ounce of effort. It's a self-imposed prophecy on the race to the bottom to not even be an average, well functioning, competent adult.
The pain my looks have weighed on me have rendered me too numb to do anything else. I wake up, and I just can't muster up the will, courage, or attention with my rotted undiagonised ADHD gooner brain to do anything else outside of my shit job such as fixing my career path to make $$$ or read a book so I can know more about the world. Doesn't it make me retarded if I know my QOL could be slightly better, but I don't try, I don't fight for shit with my one life? I can't help it. What can I do when it feels so jester to even try atp?
I used to post my uninhibited, unchained ugly thoughts to hold myself accountable by ushering in ego death by making myself a lolcow for the brutally honest of the forum
but I think I might be a narcissist who couldn't have my ego affirmed, and now I feel like this is my cope. Perhaps I find a certain level of Pride in larping as The Stonecold TrueCel , basking in the cold, hard, painful truth that the rest of the bluepilled LTN braindead majority of society who are only capable of shunning and ridiculing truthtellers out of cult-like reactionary fear, but I haven't.
But, that's just me just giving myself the excuse to not even try because I myself am also fearful, fearful of the unfamiliar: An unfamiliar place where I'm not a total loser sticking with the same daily routines that make me feel safe, but doing something different and proving I'm capable of doing..
something IDK.. maybe I'm not so worthless after all
Proving that I was WRONG about me being a wholly unforgivably pathetic shitty piece of shit who deserves to suffer would hurt my ego. The fact that I'm not on is proves that I'm a fakecel and I still have hope even if it's little. Only a retard wouldn't give it a shot.
When I was a grey, I posted as
imabadman02 (old AVI's below)
Most of my "content" on this forum is:
1. "Rate this Stacy" goonbait ¹ ² ³ ⁴ ⁵
(JFL at porn links on a site with JB's)¹ ² ³ ⁴
2. cringey fakecel emo vents ¹ ² ³ ⁴
3. ranting about Jews & Israel
"If I'm just a rotter acting on my self-sabotaging impulses, why am I here and not .is?"
A question no one asked, but this is a stream of thought for my personal needs. I feel like I really need to sit down and I think evaluate what I'm doing with my life rather than avoiding reality, so feel free to DNR, but for anyone who has ever hated seeing my replies, I hope you appreciate the mini self-evis above and I'll appreciate any advice anyone would like to free if they choose to do so.
I joined here with the goal in mind that I was going to turn my life around and "ascend" to become an ethereal True Alejandro brown e-boy as corny as that sounds, but I think the more I got blackpilled, the more I saw what I desired, the higher my ceiling became, the more stonecold and hopeless I became. I don't want to settle for nothing less than the best, but I'm too lucid to understand that isn't possible for me to be on the same level as other brownies like Cameron Alborzian and too aware of how many beautiful white Stacies like Anja Winkelmann are out there. I feel my fate is either:
- white HTB+ NEVER ever miscegenates with me, not even
IOI my whole life. - Even IF I did get her, I feel I couldn't ever earn their ❤
- Settle for brown lookmatch and never get hard (over for her)
Regardless if it's true if a boneless chubby cheeked 5'10.5 hypergamous zero dimo shitskin couldn't ever get a white HTB+'s love, I need to face the fact that staying on the doomer larp and throttling my mental health is ironically only making things much worse than they could be if I just stayed ignorant to the truth or put an ounce of effort. It's a self-imposed prophecy on the race to the bottom to not even be an average, well functioning, competent adult.
The pain my looks have weighed on me have rendered me too numb to do anything else. I wake up, and I just can't muster up the will, courage, or attention with my rotted undiagonised ADHD gooner brain to do anything else outside of my shit job such as fixing my career path to make $$$ or read a book so I can know more about the world. Doesn't it make me retarded if I know my QOL could be slightly better, but I don't try, I don't fight for shit with my one life? I can't help it. What can I do when it feels so jester to even try atp?
I used to post my uninhibited, unchained ugly thoughts to hold myself accountable by ushering in ego death by making myself a lolcow for the brutally honest of the forum
but I think I might be a narcissist who couldn't have my ego affirmed, and now I feel like this is my cope. Perhaps I find a certain level of Pride in larping as The Stonecold TrueCel , basking in the cold, hard, painful truth that the rest of the bluepilled LTN braindead majority of society who are only capable of shunning and ridiculing truthtellers out of cult-like reactionary fear, but I haven't. But, that's just me just giving myself the excuse to not even try because I myself am also fearful, fearful of the unfamiliar: An unfamiliar place where I'm not a total loser sticking with the same daily routines that make me feel safe, but doing something different and proving I'm capable of doing..
something IDK.. maybe I'm not so worthless after all
Proving that I was WRONG about me being a wholly unforgivably pathetic shitty piece of shit who deserves to suffer would hurt my ego. The fact that I'm not on is proves that I'm a fakecel and I still have hope even if it's little. Only a retard wouldn't give it a shot.
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